Page 40 of Still Made For You

“Oh, umm, is she expecting you?”

“No, she isn’t. Is there something wrong?” Before she could even respond, a little boy appeared out of nowhere, crawling in between her legs. The moment our eyes locked, I felt my soul leaving my body.

“Saint! Get your butt back in here and finish eating your food! Sienna, who’s at the door?” I heard her voice before I saw her face. My mind was still trying to process what I’d just witnessed. I wasn’t even sure how to feel about the visit anymore because I had more questions now than I did before I got out of the car.

“Umm, it’s for you.” When Saya said her name, it dawned on me why she seemed so familiar. This was her little sister. She was just a preteen the last time I saw her, and she’d changed quite a bit.

“Well, why are you standing there like you’ve seen a gho-” Her words faltered as tears welled in her eyes. This wasn’t the response I’d prepared for, so I was frozen in place. Sienna removed the little boy from the doorway as Saya stood there sobbing.

A part of me wanted to comfort her, but there was also a part of me that wasn’t sure how she’d react. When she started hyperventilating, that’s when I decided to step in. Walking up to her, I scooped her up in my arms and then walked inside of her house.

“Breathe.” I wasn’t sure what to do, but I knew I wasn’t going to get any answers if I couldn’t get her to calm down.

Walking over to her couch, I sat down with her in my lap as she continued to fall apart. My mind was reeling, and if I wasn’t so focused on her, I probably would have had a panic attack of my own. Saya wrapped her arms around my neck as she wept into my chest. Whatever she’d gone through, she was now releasing, so I allowed her a moment to get it all out. Afterward, there were a lot of things we needed to talk about. It took about ten minutes for her to finally calm down, but instead of us talking, she ended up falling asleep in my arms.

I hated how comfortable I felt having her this close to me, but I felt at peace in this moment. Laying back on the couch, I rubbed her back while she slept. I said a silent prayer because I had a feeling everything in my world was about to change. Whether it was for the good or bad had yet to be determined.

At some point, the little boy made his way back into the living room. Once he saw Saya in my arms, he walked right over to us, taking a seat next to me. He laid his head against my arm, causing my body to stiffen in return. My brain started doing the math in my head, and no matter how I tried to piece it together, nothing was adding up. The thoughts running through my mind were causing me to become angry, but I knew I needed to hear it from her before I reacted. What I did know was this little boy did not belong to me, and that alone caused my heart to shatter. Before long, the two of them were sleeping on me, leaving me to sit in place until they decided to wake up.

“Umm, when she wakes up, tell her to call me. It was nice seeing you again,” Sienna rushed out before throwing her purse over her shoulder. I still couldn’t believe I was really sitting here like this. Once the sun started to go down, I knew I needed to do something. Saya had some explaining to do, and her ass was not about to avoid it any longer. She’d have plenty of time to sleep after I left.

“Aye.” Gently, I shook her in my arms. I tried not to move my left side too much since baby boy was snoring peacefully.

“Hmmm?” Saya stretched in my arms until our eyes finally locked. When she glanced around and realized where she was, she immediately freaked out.

“Where’s my son?” The panic in her tone was clear, so I nodded my head to the other side of me. She breathed a sigh of relief and then stared back at me again.

“What are you doing here? How did you find me?” I eyed her curiously, wondering what was going through her mind right now.

“You don’t think we have some things we need to talk about?” I glanced down at her son, who lay curled up against my arm.

“It’s not what it looks like. You never came back for me when you got out, so I just figured it was for the best. Especially after everything went down the way it did.” My face frowned in confusion because I wasn’t sure what incident it was that she was referring to.

“Go put him to bed so we can talk,” I commanded. We were going to lay this shit out on the table once and for all.

“Okay,” sliding off my lap, she picked her son up and walked out of the room. She glanced back at me for a moment before heading down the hall. My phone had been going crazy, and I already knew it was more than likely Sidra. I’d never been in a situation where I needed to lie to her, so when she asked me where I was, I wasn’t sure what to say.

She normally wasn’t the type to trip, but I’ve never mentioned Saya to her. I mean, we’ve talked about our past, but I usually tried to downplay it, so it didn’t sound as if I was still hung up on her. I knew how insecure women could be, so since Saya wasn’t a factor in my life, there was no need to tell her anything.

Deciding to keep it simple, I texted her that I was out of town. Technically, it wasn’t a lie, as Saya lived in a different city. It took me two hours and some change to get here. She texted me back okay also making sure to tell me she loved me. I hated when she did that because I wasn’t there yet. A lot of men liked to throw that word around to get what they wanted from women, but not me.

We were taught to only use the word love if we were willing to kill for that person. There’s only been one person outside of my family who’s ever heard those words from me, and she was currently standing in front of me with her hands behind her back.

“Have a seat. You know I don’t like having people standing over me. That shit is weird,” I grumbled. She knew how I felt about that weird shit.

“Sorry. Umm, I wasn’t expecting you to show up like this so I’m sorry if I’m not prepared. When I saw you, it just brought back a bunch of memories I wasn’t ready for.”

“You know I don’t like to beat around the bush, so I need you to make all of this make sense to me. One minute, you were telling me you loved me, and the next minute, you were gone. My family reached out to yours to make sure you were straight, and they acted as if it were a secret to know your whereabouts.” She stared down at the carpet with her hands in her lap.

“I-that night we talked on the phone, you told me that someone was going to be bringing me some money,” I recalled the night in question. Since I was gone, my family had been making sure my portion of the bills were taken care of, so it wouldn’t be such a burden to her.

“Well, two men showed up and handed me a duffle back of what I assumed was the money. I thought they were going to turn around and leave after making sure I got it, but they didn't." She paused to wipe her face while my heart rate sped up uncontrollably. I knew she wasn’t saying someone in my family had hurt her because they wouldn’t do something like that.

“I don’t remember much from that night. All I remember was the first guy punching me in the face and then the other one climbing on top of me. He punched me again, knocking me out completely. The next thing I remember was waking up in a pool of blood while hearing sirens in the background. Our neighbors called the police, and I was rushed to the hospital. They sedated me for a couple of days due to the extent of my trauma.” My hand rubbed her back in a circular motion as she explained what happened to her.

My ears grew hot from the rage brewing inside of me. I didn’t want to alarm her, so I tried to keep my face as neutral as possible.

“Your father found out what happened, and he came to see me after I was released from the hospital. He apologized to me because he’d sent a couple of corner boys in his place that night and he felt terrible about what happened. My parents wanted to file charges but Prosper assured them he’d handle it. He kept his promise to me.” My chest was tight, being that this was the first time I’d heard anything like this. I’d basically been my father’s caregiver since I’d been home, and not once did he mention this to me.

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