Page 6 of How to Write a Rom-Com

“That’s the spirit,” Elle says sarcastically. I stick my tongue out at her.

“So, Lucy goes to a small town? To do what,exactly?” Terri asks.

“Why are we assuming that I would have to be the one to go? Maybe we should focus our attention on Elle,” I offer.

“I’m not asbitteras you,” Elle replies, scrunching her perfect button nose. I scratch my temple with my middle finger.

“Plus, Elle is not as much of a strong-armed city girl,” Anne rebuts, winking.

“I’m not disagreeing with you, but I did elbow a guy in the gut on the subway yesterday,” Elle interjects, raising her finger like she’s making a valid point.

“Yeah, alright, settle down over there, Rocky,” Anne mocks. She turns her gaze back to me. “I’m more interested in the idea of a bitter—”

“Hey!” I whine.

“Sorry—allegedlybitter, hardcore city girl going to a small town.”

“And what would that actually entail?” I ask skeptically.

“Getting to know the locals, scoping out the romance scene, appreciating nature, all that shit,” Anne adds.

“And you’re somehow going to turn that into a romance novel?” I ask.

“Well, I’mhoping, Miss Tinder-Never-After,you’regoing to turn it into a small-town rom-com. You might be inspired by the scenery, or some charming townies,” she muses. “And from there, you’ll have a whole universe to base a series around.”

“Maybe there will even be a single, handsome local who will lure you away from the big city for good,” Elle muses.

“I’m sure there won’t be,” I say seriously.

“So, you’ll do it?” Anne practically jumps out of her chair.

“Do what? This is all hypothetical!”

“Listen, my in-laws have a house upstate. They rent it out most of the year. Let’s say you go up there and work remotely from—” Anne pauses for a moment, glancing down at the calendar in her notebook. “Memorial Day to July 4th. See what you can come up with.”

I look at her like she has seventeen heads. “Let me get this straight,” I say taking a deep breath. “You want to pay me to spend a month at your in-laws’ lake house?” Anne grins. I look around at the rest of the team. All eyes are on me. “No one else thinks this is crazy?”

“Frankly I’m bummed that I don’t qualify for this work trip. I sure didn’t get an offer like that when I was an assistant,” Nicole mumbles.

“Ditto,” Elle adds.

“Lucy, you still have quite a few vacation days to use,” Anne reminds me. I mentally grumble about how far it’s gotten me. “You can roll them in with the trip, take some time for yourself. And anyway, we need to demonstrate that we’re doing everything we can to get Ruby her next bestseller. It’s going to take a big gesture of commitment, and this might be it.”

“And what would you do without an assistant for a month?” I ask Anne, tilting my head knowingly.

“I did work in the industry for a number of years before you came along, Lucy,” Anne says with a sassy tone.

“You can’t even use the printer,” I deadpan.

“Irrelevant,” she scoffs. “And I’m not suggesting that I wouldn’t have an assistant. You would be working remotely.”

“I think a break from the city would be good for you,” Elle says, probably thinking about our conversation from this morning. “And I would happily do any printing for Anne while you’re gone.” Elle and I lock eyes and it is so clear how excited she is for me. It almost doesn’t make me mad at her for supporting this idea and making me the center of attention at this meeting. She knows how much I hate that.

“We’ll iron out all the details before you go, but the summer is slow for us. The timing is perfect.” I turn my head back to Anne and try to think of some way to respond. “Just promise me you’ll think about it.”

I’m not sure what to say. A month alone in a lakeside cabin? Anne has shown me pictures of her and her wife Penny at her parents’ place, and it’s cute, but I haven’t spent time at a lake well—ever. The last boat I went on was a Carnival cruise.

I take a beat to consider this. Anne wants to pay me to basically work from vacation? Has she completely forgotten all the unspoken rules of publishing?

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