Page 24 of Ti Amo

“Yes, you are the most feared man in all of southern Italy, we all know it.”

He cringed at the bite of sarcasm he heard in her voice. He asked for it.

“But you don’t fool me. I know this is all some wall of defense you’ve built around you. You’re using my betrayal to justify hiding your pain. That’s what’s so ironic. You already showed me your pain, Giovanni. When we visited Chianti and came here. Why do you think I gave myself to you? Why I fell in love with you. I see who you struggle to be, and it breaks my heart. You aren’t your father.”

“No shit.”

Mira exhaled another deep sigh. “Let’s start again. Evidently something more is between us. You need to tell me what it is. What is it you want to know? Ask me anything and I promise to answer you truthfully. Anything,” she said.

“I’m in no mood.” Giovanni sat forward to rise. One touch from her, and he couldn’t further the action.

“You keep pushing me away, I’ll stop trying to stay by your side. Can’t you see I don’t want to go away?”

He glanced over to her, and she met his stare. Even he didn’t think to challenge her statement. After all she had escaped him once with his daughter, and he knew firsthand how far a woman would go to protect her child. His mother had taught him that lesson.

“Ask me a question, Giovanni. Anything.”

“Eve.” He managed to say.

“What do you want to know?”

“Something. She’s a… baby. When did she take her first step?” he asked, surprised to hear himself say it. He just grasped the first thing to enter his mind.

Mira smiled. “She was ten months.”

“That’s early isn’t it?” Giovanni frowned.

“I think so. I didn’t know much about kids until Eve came along. I sure as hell didn’t expect my baby to stand and run to me.”

“Run?”

“Let me start over. One day I was sewing her dress and she was on the floor playing with some rolls of fabric. I glanced over to say something, not sure. I talk to her a lot. I guess because I spent so much time alone after… well I turned my head to say something and she stood.”

“She stood upright?”

“Yes. She did. She gripped this chair in my sewing room by the seat. She used it for balance. She did that often. When and wherever she could pull up on something she did. So I laughed and said her name to make her smile. She let go of the chair, wobbled a bit,” Mira demonstrated by sitting forward and extending her arms in the way Eve did to balance herself. “And then she ran straight for me.”

Giovanni’s eyes stretched in disbelief. “It didn’t happen that way,” he chuckled.

“Yes it did. I’m serious. Her little legs moved fast. No walking, she ran straight for me.”

Together they shared a laugh. He returned his gaze to the fire, smiling. He could see it all play out the way Mira described. The moment was between mother and daughter as it should be. He felt less cheated to know she hadn’t run to another man she called ‘poppy’. “She could run but not walk?” he asked.

“Well she could walk too, but toddlers prefer to move fast. You’ll see.” Mira winked. “What else do you want to know?” she again touched his knee. Giovanni rose. His abrupt stand made him a bit light headed but he managed to not drop down again. “Nothing,” he mumbled and headed for the stairs. He left her watching him from the sofa.

Her face grew hot with embarrassment. Did she imagine it? The brief moment when she felt them connecting was now gone. Mira couldn’t hide how much his rejection hurt. She felt her entire body seize with the threat of an emotional break. It was as if her touch repulsed him. She loved him so much, and he could barely stand the sight of her. Maybe he never truly loved her. She felt like a fool for trying so hard to connect to him. Sadly she rose and returned to the room her daughter slept in. Eve was trapped in the middle of the bed with pillows on either side of her to keep from rolling off the high raised mattress. She lay on her back with her arms and legs flung open. Mira stood near her bed staring down at her. She wiped both hands down her face and let go another sad sigh. Mentally she was done. There wasn’t much left to do or say tonight.

She walked over to her suitcase and found a pair of panties and nightshirt to sleep in. The bathroom was as tiny as the closet, with just a toilet, shower and sink. Mira turned on the water, and began to undress. As soon as she stepped in the shower she felt relaxed. The tepid water washed over her and the day’s strain drained from her bones and washed away.

Giovanni returned with a blanket. Mira of course had gone to bed. He was such a coward for running from her. There was no way in hell he could pretend that the last two years didn’t happen. He lived his life by a code, and she had broken more than one of them by her actions. And then came the questions that haunted him since he first heard the news she was alive. The answers he knew she’d give scared him too much to ask. Exhausted he readied to stretch out on the sofa but paused at the sound of running water. His gaze went to the hall that led to the back room and kitchen. Was she showering?

In the room he found his daughter asleep. He smiled down at her. When did they create a baby? Was it the first night in Bellagio or the last night they made love in Sorrento? Whenever it happened it was evident that their daughter possessed all of the good they shared during their short time together. Now it seemed that they disagreed on the very nature and meaning of love. And that was his fault.

The shower stopped.

His gaze shifted to the door. Mira probably thought the worst of him. He owed her some kind of explanation. When he went to the door and opened it a haze of warm steamy damp air drew him in. The rich creamy vanilla soap mixed with a hint of lavender she’d brought with her to bathe with overwhelmed him. Mira had a thick white towel patting her skin dry. Deep in thought she barely noticed him, but when her eyes lifted to his, their gazes locked. She didn’t cover her nudity from him. Instead the look of frustration in her eyes from his sudden appearance expressed how Giovanni felt. One look at her and the beast in him didn’t want to talk it over. He wanted to fuck her, claim her, and recapture all of what he’d lost the day she disappeared from his life.

“What now? I’m tired, Giovanni. I’m not arguing with you anymore.”

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