Page 331 of Redeemed

“Up,” Colton says softly as he lifts me into his arms again. “You wanna sit at the counter?”

“Yes, please.”

Xander pulls out one of the stools, and Colton lowers me onto it. They both step away, and that panicky feeling comes back until they stop a few feet away. Colton is saying something to Xander that I can’t make out, and given the look on Xan’s face, it’s not a pleasant topic.

“Tonight?” he asks.

“Probably for the best,” Colton says.

Xander’s Aunt Josie is sitting at the table, and one of the chairs is pushed aside to make room for Phil’s wheelchair. Phil is watching me with his brows furrowed in concern, but when I glance his way, he quickly puts on a bright smile and waves.

“Glad you’re home, Haven,” he tells me.

“Thank you.” I turn so I’m facing him. “How, um… how are you doing?”

“Better every day. Been doing my physical therapy exercises while I’ve been here. Should be back on my feet by the end of summer.”

Phil’s statement is hopeful. Happy. Yet it sets off a chain reaction in my head that has my chest tightening to a painful point.

Pregnant by the end of summer.

You have your duties, and I have mine.

May God’s will be done.

God’s will.

God’s will.

God’s will.

“Haven?”

I jump so hard I almost fall off the stool, but Xander is already right in front of me with his hands on my waist. With a terrified sound, I grab onto his shirt. He keeps me steady as I regain my senses, and I go still when I realize everyone is watching me.

“Hey.” Xander ducks down so he’s at eye level. “You’re okay.”

“I’m sorry,” Phil says. “I didn’t mean to make you freeze like that, Haven.”

“No, it—it wasn’t you. I…”

But I can’t speak. It feels like my throat is closing up. I can barely get a breath in, let alone get words out.

A cold feeling hits my chest, and when I look down, I realize Colton is holding an ice pack to me. His body shields me from the view of everyone at the table, but it doesn’t make it any easier to get in a deep breath.

“There’s too many people in here,” Colton mutters to Xander.

Xander doesn’t say anything, but his eyes dart to the table for a split second.

“I’ve got her,” Colton says. “You need to be with your dad. I’ll get her out of here.”

“N-no.” I grab at Xander, and I frantically search the room until I find Lucas.

“Just going to the living room,” Colton tells me in a soothing voice. “You’ll still be able to see them.”

I want to tell him that it’s not about me being able to see Lucas and Xander. It’s aboutthembeing able to seeme.Even with Isaiah dead, it’s the only way I feel safe.

“You’ll be okay, doll. Just go with Colton.”

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