Page 135 of Redeemed

“Stop deflecting,” I snap. “You took it too far, and she’s been having an ongoing panic attack ever since. She was even restless while she was asleep.”

Colton narrows his eyes. “Since when did you grow a conscience, Eldridge? It doesn’t suit you.”

“Since it suitsher.”

He clenches his jaw, looking away.

“I’m still on board with your plan,” I remind him. “But we need to cool it a bit. Hate or not, I know you don’t want to push her this far.”

“What are you suggesting?”

“Apologizing to her, for starters.”

Colton flashes me a deadly glare. “Like hell I will.”

“God fucking dammit, Colton! At the bare minimum, Haven needs to know her body is safe. That’s always been our number one rule. We could hurt her any way but physically. And you fucking broke that.”

“Things changed,” he growls.

“Why, because we’re supposed to be protecting her? Do I need to remind you from what?” I shove him, knowing the only reason he stumbles back is because he wasn’t expecting it.

“We were clear when we discussed our agreement that—”

“I don’t care! Some motherfucker wants to hurt her. Possiblykillher. We’re the only people she can turn to for help, and we’re going to treat her the same wayhewould? Do you not see how fucked up-that is?”

“She’s not going to open up on her own,” he snaps. “That’s what I got her to do. Some asshole raped her, god knows how many times. My best bet is that it’s the same guy who’s after her now, although she won’t fucking confirm it.”

“She told you that?”

He nods. “All those people we thought she fucked? She didn’t. Not a single one. She was too scared and couldn’t get past her fear. Taking it slow doesn’t work with her. Not for this.”

“So your solution is to rape her more,” I say flatly.

“If that’s what it takes.”

You’ve got to be kidding me.

“Do you hear yourself right now?” I shout.

“Don’t tell me you don’t want to,” he challenges. “I’ve seen it in your eyes. Lucas’s too.”

I rear back. He’s right. I know it’s wrong, wanting to force yourself on a person—even more wrong to act on the desire. But it’s there, and it always has been. I want Haven underneath me, fighting me, screaming and begging me to stop while I fuck her. I love the idea of her being completely helpless against me.

But not in the way Colton did.

“Not like this,” I seethe. “What you did was torture.”

I’m aware that maybe I’m drawing a line where there shouldn’t be one, but for me, it’s there. It’s still too far—I’m well aware—but I accepted the darker parts of myself ages ago. But I don’t think I’devergo as far as Colton went today.

“It worked,” Colton says. “We’re one step closer to uncovering what she’s hiding.”

I’m too pissed to think logically. Colton has his guard up now, so when I swing at him, he shoves me back so hard I slam into the wall. It knocks the breath out of me, but I’m lunging at him again immediately. He’s a wall of muscle, just like Lucas, but I have rage on my side.

When I slam into him, he stumbles back, but he’s ready with a counter blow. Just as he’s winding up to punch me, Lucas’s deep voice fills the room.

“Back the fuck off.”

Colton and I turn to find him halfway down the stairs. His hair is a mess, and the glare he has pointed at Colton is murderous.

---