Page 217 of Redeemed

Did we go too far?

“Doll, what’s wrong?”

“I think she just needs to go back to sleep,” Lucas whispers. “She’s exhausted, she’s high, and this… this was a lot.”

“You’re right.” I lower my head, murmuring, “We’re going to put you to bed now, all right?”

Her only response is to cling to me tighter. It takes both of us to coax her under the covers, and even then, she doesn’t let go of me. I keep her trembling body in my arms, and Lucas slides in and spoons her, his hand on her hip.

“You’re okay,” he tells her gently. “You’re okay, little fawn.”

She’s still shaking, but I feel her relax a little, and when Lucas’s eyes snap to mine, I know he noticed it, too.

“Say it again,” I whisper.

“Say what?” he whispers back.

“The little fawn part? All of it? I don’t know, just do it again.”

Lucas inches closer to Haven. His large body dwarfs hers, and I swear I feel her lean into him just a touch.

Kissing her temple, Lucas murmurs, “You’re safe, little fawn. You’re okay. Just breathe for us, okay? Nice and deep.”

She manages to take a shuddering breath, and Lucas and I share a look of relief.

“That was so good.” He kisses the shell of her ear. “Can you do it again for us?”

For the next few minutes, we stay just like that. As Lucas continues soothing Haven, the tension eases out of her body. Her hands fall away from where she was clutching my shoulders, and her breathing deepens to a normal, relaxed point.

Thank fuck.I’d say the words out loud, but she’s so close to falling asleep again, and I don’t want to disturb that.

But then Haven nestles her head into my chest, and a tortured whisper slips past her lips. “It’s never felt good before. It’s always hurt.”

Lucas’s face falls, and I can feel my ribcage tightening. No matter how hard Haven tries to run from that goddamn cult, she can’t escape it. The memories, the pain, Isaiah’s cruelty—it follows her everywhere.

“It’ll never hurt like that again,” Lucas promises her quietly.

A rage I’ve been trying to ignore curls around my heart like an iron fist. Haven begged us not to kill Isaiah, and I understand why. Killing him will cause a lot of pain and suffering for his family. But the more I learn about Haven’s past, the more I believe they alldeserveto feel that pain.

How many times did they turn a blind eye to what Isaiah was doing to her? How many of them thought it was justified? Normal?

Lucas’s hand slides onto my waist. “Xan. Calm down.”

It takes me a second to realize what he means. Tension riddles my muscles, and my breathing has turned harsh. There will be time for anger later, but right now, my focus needs to be on Haven.

Forcing myself to relax, I place a kiss to the top of her head. She lets out the tiniest of whimpers before fully drifting off. It only takes Lucas a few minutes to follow her.

I watch their dark, sleeping forms for hours. My mind goes in every direction—how Haven looked when she came in the front seat of my car, the specific ways I’d kill Isaiah to draw out his pain, the stupid paper I have due at the end of next week.

It’s not until the sky is beginning to lighten that I fall asleep. There really, truly is no rest for the wicked.

Xander

Christmas break

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“Xan! You’re home!” Rachel flies into my arms the second I step through the front door of my dad’s house.

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