Page 124 of The Order

“I’m not speaking to you!” Kai yells, his voice filled with emotion. I hear my mother angrily stomp away, overwhelmed and stressed. Her next shift is only a few hours away.

I shoot to my feet, feeling my brother's hand grasp my front.

“Don’t engage him,” Kai says fearfully.

I say nothing, but pull away from his grasp, making my way closer to the door. My father's banging has silenced, but I can hear him breathing heavily as he waits on the other side of the door.

“No one is going to speak to you when you're acting like that,” I say, finally giving him the acknowledgment he wants.

“Forest!” my father begins, once more jiggling the lock. “You can’t hide in there forever,” he says, his voice broken.

“You're drunk!” Kai yells, putting in his two cents.

“I just, I just want to speak to you,” my father says, his voice close to a sob. “Please.” My eyes shoot to Kai. My brother shakes his head at me, silently begging me not to give in.

“Go to your study, and I’ll meet you there,” I start, ignoring my brother’s silent “no’s.”

“Just you. Alone. Your brother stays.” he commands.

A part of me was terrified for what would happen when I got to his study; what words would fall between us, either tearing us further apart or bringing me closer to understanding the man I looked to for strength for so many years. I didn’t know if I had the strength to face him alone or to navigate the emotions hiding just beneath the surface of my flesh, threatening to take me over.

But then I remembered Fallan had promised me that I’d never be alone, and suddenly, crossing the threshold into the space beyond my room didn’t seem so terrifying anymore.

The hallway leading to my father’s study is chillier than usual, a draft lingering as we round the corner and reach our destination. Kai lingers in the doorway with me, struggling to let go of me to face our father without him. My mother watches me from the bedroom, trepidation written across her face.

“He’s waiting for you,” she says. My stomach is unsettled at the realization her chip blinks green.

“Why don't you take Mom and have some tea in the living room,” I whisper to Kai, giving him a look that begs him not to push me on this. He narrows his eyes as he observes her, noticing how unnaturally relaxed she seems. Someone has recently activated her chip. I’m not sure who stands in front of us now.

Kai nods, letting go of my hand with a gulp. I let our fingers part, staring at the closed door of the study.

“If I hear anything weird at all, I’m coming in there,” Kai whispers, giving the door one last look before pulling away.

I watch him gather my mother in his arms, guiding her to the kitchen. I watch the light fade behind her ear. I grab the door handle of my father's study, forcing myself inside and into the dimly lit setting.

He sits at one of the chairs in front of his desk, hunched over in its worn leather seat, and swirling his glass of scotch. He doesn’t raise his head as the door creaks on its hinges. The room is dimly lit, with shadows casting into every corner, creating long, eerie shapes along the walls. The small lamp sitting on a table beside the chair he’s in barely illuminates his face, making his features look drained. I close the door behind me, unsettled by the thick and heavy air around me. I watch him closely, clenching my fists to control my nerves.

“You cannot go back to that sector,” he whispers, placing his glass on the side table.

All of that for an empty warning?

“What are you worried I’ll see?” I question, watching his head slowly rise.

“I’m not worried what you’ll see,” his voice shutters. “I’m worried what will seeyou,” he says.

I feel Its presence enter my mind, unnerving and ready to speak. I give in and let It take over for me.

“What are you so afraid of?” It questions for me, using my voice with ease. He scoffs at the accusation, my mind already working to shove back Its presence.

“You know, the silver in your hair is brighter. Like the metal of a blade,” he says whimsically, pointing to the streaks with the same hand still wrapped around his glass of scotch.

“What are you afraid of, Dad?” I question again, ignoring his comment.

“There are people in this world who will use you, Forest,” he rises to his feet. “People who will take you and mold you into a weapon for them to control,” he continues, swaying on his feet. “They told me what's to come, what has already passed-”

"Who told him these things?”It asks into the recess of my mind.

“Who is hunting me?” I question, watching his mouth slowly curve downward.

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