Page 25 of Must Love Christmas

“That’s literally what illness does.” Simon’s toss missed the target by a wide margin.

“You know what I mean.” Garen’s voice was growing raspier with each sentence. “Real strength is about character, and that’s something no illness can ever steal.”

Simon snorted, which hurt his head. “Can you actually hear the bullshit as it comes out of your mouth?”

“Usually, but it tends to be on a three-second delay.”

Simon gave a full laugh this time, resulting in a coughing fit. He unwrapped another cherry throat lozenge and popped it into his mouth. “I’ve been wondering, and tell me if this is none of my business, but…who ended the relationship between you and Luca?”

Garen hesitated. “I broke up with him. I left him cos I thought he was gonnae leave me.”

“Was he?”

Garen gave a long sigh, interrupted by a sniffle. “No, in retrospect I don’t think so. He just had a different way of showing feelings, and I…” He sniffled again. “Misinterpreted?”

Simon flipped the lozenge around in his mouth, contemplating what he’d just learned and wondering whether he’d said anything that could have touched off Garen’s sensitivity. “I’m sorry I lectured you about cleaning.”

“Och, nae bother.” Garen rolled onto his side, adjusting his pillow with a series of thumps and fluffs. “You weren’t wrong. I’ve got a lot to learn.”

“I didn’t have to be a dick about it.”

“You were just reeling from my accidental bait-and-switch, where one night I said we’d have some sort of relationship and then the next morning said, ‘Oops, no, that’s us just flatmates now.’”

Well, there it was. They were discussing it. “You’re saying I insulted you because I was bitter at being deprived of your body?”

“It is quite the deprivation.” Garen looked down at himself. “Not at the moment, of course, with all my phlegm and cold sweat.”

“I’ll not lie and say I wasn’t disappointed. But I’m over it.”

“Ah. Well.” Garen pulled his knees to his chest, rearranging the sky-blue duvet to keep his feet covered. “That makes one of us.”

Simon stared at him. “What are you saying?”

“That I still like you. I still want you.” He cleared his throat. “Not at the moment, of course, with all your phlegm and cold sweat.”

Simon’s heart started to pound. “So…”

“So nothing. I’ll get over it, same as you’ve done.” Garen tugged the covers up to his chin, then let out a full-body shiver. The bottom half of the duvet slipped onto the floor. “Shit.”

“I’ve got it.” Simon went over and picked up the duvet. He laid it across Garen’s quaking form, then secured it behind him and under his feet. “Better?”

“Much. Thanks.”

After one week with this man, Simon felt completely unmoored. It was hard enough moving to a new city and starting a new job without also wrangling feelings toward his flatmate. He was already juggling too many balls, and now Garen had tossed a flaming chainsaw into the mix to see if Simon could keep that aloft as well.

He leaned over and swept Garen’s damp hair from his face, tucking it behind his ear. “I think you might be an agent of chaos.”

“Naw.” Garen smiled, his eyes still closed. “More like a freelance chaos consultant.”

* * *

52 Days UntilChristmas

The evening air was damp with impending rain, but Simon happily breathed it in as he sped along the Kelvingrove Park jogging path. Wherever he went in the world, as long as he was in these shoes doing what he most loved, he felt at home.

Almost, anyway. While Garen had been right that Simon didn’t play team sports, he hadn’t always trained alone like this. Now he couldn’t help missing the friends he’d run with in Toxteth’s Prince’s Park. They could still encourage one another via text—usually in the form of shit-talking, of course—but there was no substitute for having a mate by his side.

Simon checked the heart monitor on his wrist to make sure he wasn’t overexerting himself in his first workout since the flu. The monitor reinforced what his lungs were already telling him: Apart from intermittent sniffles, he was brand new again. If he worked hard, he could still catch up on his training regimen. Maybe he’d even achieve a personal record at this month’s marathon in San Sebastián, Spain, where he’d reunite with three of his pals from “Tocky.”

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