Page 88 of Playing to Win

Lost, but also found.

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Colin returned from the bathroom, expecting to find Andrew sitting up in bed sipping wine, or perhaps even away to the kitchen assembling dinner.

But he was still lying where Colin had left him, only now he was half under the duvet instead of atop it. With an arm draped over his head, he stared at the ceiling with that same dazed look he always had after sex (though never for this long).

“Hey.” Colin went over and picked up one of the wine glasses, unsure which was his. “All right?”

Andrew turned his head to gaze at him, and the sight—those blissful silver-blue eyes, the rampantly tousled hair, and one long, tan, bare leg stretching out from beneath the white sheet—nearly brought Colin to his knees. He wished he were a photographer, so he could capture the utter artistry of this moment.

“Come here,” Andrew said, just above a whisper.

Colin held up the other wine glass, but Andrew shook his head.

“Just you,” he said, lifting the edge of the covers. “Lie with me.”

Colin obeyed. Andrew shifted next to him, then slowly rested his arm across Colin’s chest.

“Oh.” Colin carefully moved his own arm aside and looped it over Andrew’s shoulders, half expecting to be pushed away. But Andrew settled his head upon Colin, tucking his face into his neck.

Hiding his shock, Colin pulled him close with both arms. “Are we cuddling, then?” he had to ask.

“We are sharing a moment of quiet repose,” Andrew murmured, his breath brushing Colin’s skin. “Call it whatever you like.”

I call it paradise.Colin fought the urge to cling, and instead merely stroked his thumb against the impossibly smooth skin of Andrew’s elbow.

“Did you mean it,” Andrew asked, “when you said you won’t leave? I feel like you’re always on the verge of walking out forever.”

Apparently Colin had done a poor job of hiding his instincts. “I never wanted to leave. I just didn’t want to be asked to leave.”

“Oh Colin.” Andrew tightened his embrace for a long moment. Then he shifted his other arm up to rest his elbow on Colin’s pillow. “If you stay, I can’t promise it’ll be easy. This world will not be kind to us as a couple. I can’t shield you from all the prejudice we’ll face, but I can promise I won’t abandon you. I won’t walk away.” He took Colin’s hand and kissed his knuckles. “Will you make me that same promise?”

“I—sorry, I’m not sure what you’re asking.”

“I want us to be boyfriends,” Andrew blurted. “Publicly. I don’t mean to make an announcement or anything crass like that. But I don’t want to hide you anymore.”

Colin’s tongue felt stuck to the roof of his mouth. He managed a shaky nod.

“Is that a yes?” Andrew asked.

“Aye.” Colin took Andrew’s face in his hands and kissed him. “Aye, it’s a yes. Aye, I want this. It’s fucking terrifying, but aye, I want it.”

“Oh, thank God. I was about to pass out there for a moment.” He reached across Colin for the wine glasses. “Really need that drink now.”

They sat up to toast their new status, then sipped side by side, legs pressed together, holding tight to each other’s free hand. Colin’s heart was still slamming his chest. He felt like he was about to dive into the biggest rave crowd of his life, a crowd that might not catch him.

“It’ll be a challenge,” Andrew said, “introducing you to society.” He gave Colin a sly smile. “But I know just where to start.”

CHAPTERTWENTY-TWO

“YOU’REMEETINGHISparents!!?” Katie grabbed Colin’s shoulders so hard, he feared he’d have bruises. “The Marquess and Marchioness of Kirkross?”

“Aye, tomorrow night.” He still couldn’t believe it himself. But every moment this week seemed unreal.

Having finished the day’s canvass, he and Katie moved through Glasgow’s George Square, where hundreds of people were milling about, their Scottish Saltire flags and Yes banners waving in the brisk wind. It wasn’t an official rally, just like-minded people coming together to share this feeling of jittery hope. Most were near his age, but there were older people as well, including parents with children, who played tag among the fenced-off monuments or danced to the guitarist and bongo players camped out on the grassy area to their left.

“This is amazing!” Katie twirled around, arms extended, looking more like a winsome hippie than a fearsome fullback. “I’m so lucky to be here to witness history.”

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