Page 21 of Infected By Virus

That was a difference, a connection to his past behavior that just clicked. He’d been an adult, but not a man.

“I didn’t—” Rae spoke at the same time; he spoke almost the same words.

“Wait, Virus, let me go first, please? I should’ve said it the other day.”

He wanted to scream it’s all water under the bridge, that she didn’t need to explain anything, but instead he nodded, because he could see how important it was to her.

“First, let me apologize for how I approached things the other day. I went about it all wrong and that led you to make assumptions, rightfully so. So, I should’ve told you then that I didn’t know about Adam. I found out when Celeste was dying less than a month ago.”

When the words penetrated his brain, his jaw dropped.

“How?”

She dropped her gaze and tucked her hair behind her ear, staring at her lap.

“I gave her the same treatment I gave you. I blocked you both when I left that night. I drove until I was too tired to do anything else. I found a hotel to hole up and cry. After a few days, I had a plan, and I put it into action and refused to look back.”

She looked repentant.

“Hey.” When she didn’t meet his gaze, he used one knuckle to lift her chin. “Sun Rae, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed. Should have given you a chance to explain.”

She gave him a watery smile. “I guess we’re even because I didn’t?—”

“Don’t.”

“Don’t what—speak the truth?”

“Just … don’t.”

“No. I did don’t for over six years and it damn near killed me. It’s time we lay it all out on the table. Time we, I, accept it for what it was and what it wasn’t.”

“What it was and wasn’t?” He didn’t mean to raise his voice. Outlaw clearing his throat from a nearby table alerted him to that fact.

“Do you really want to do this here and now, Rae? Would you prefer some place more private? I have a lot to atone for.”

She grasped his hand in both of hers and the touch sent a zing through his bloodstream. He’d touched her, but this was the first time in years that she’d touched him voluntarily.

“That’s just it, Darrin. It’s the perfect time and place because neither of us can run away, and you aren’t the only one needing to apologize.”

His scoff seemed to spark a fire in her eyes.

“Do you remember what happened back then?”

Virus gave her an incredulous look. “How could I not?”

“No, I mean really remember it?”

Was she really going to make him say it out loud? He would, if that’s what she needed.

“Yea, Sunny, I do.” He didn’t mean to call her that, it just slipped out, but he didn’t want to take it back. “I cheated on you. With your sister of all people. Then I said some ugly things as you ran away crying. I could give you a million excuses, but it doesn’t matter. I did what I did, and I’ll be sorry about it for every second of my life. There’s no number of apologies or candy or anything that can make up for it or change it.”

His eyes drifted to the ball pit where his son was playing and laughing with June.

“For years I thought if I could only change things, done things differently … but now, because of Adam, I wouldn’t want to change it.”

He felt guilty and disloyal to her for even saying those words aloud, but they were true.

“That’s just it, Darrin. You didn’t cheat on me.”

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