Page 48 of Over and Above

It was nice to be needed, a thought I held on to as we made our way to my SUV a short while later.

“I don’t know what I’m more worried about,” Maren said as she carefully buckled the seat belt around her belly. “I want the baby to be okay, and I also really want to avoid a hospital birth if I can.”

“Sometimes—”

“I know.” She held up a hand. “And I know there are many amazing medical professionals who work in hospitals. I’ve met a lot of them. It’s the hospital itself—the sounds, smells, equipment.”

“It’s triggering for a lot of people, not just you.” I pitched my voice soothing as we drove to the medical complex. Outpatient radiology wasn’t in the hospital per se, but the adjacent building was likely close enough in Maren’s mind. “And if it comes to a hospital birth, we will all do everything we can to make it homey for you—music, blanket and pillow from home, anything else you want. And you’ll have Marissa and Diesel for support. Maybe Wren can teach us about aromatherapy to help with the smell issue too.”

“You’d learn about aromatherapy just for me?” She sounded skeptical but no longer despondent, which I’d take as a win.

“Of course. You’re my kid. If it means buying an essential oil diffuser and some portable speakers, I’m there.”

“Thanks,” she said softly as we arrived at the parking structure. For the first time in my life, I used aStork Parkingspot to minimize the need for Maren to walk.

Once inside, we were shown to a small ultrasound room, but our tech was summoned by another tech for a question, leaving Maren with far too much time to stew while lying on the narrow gurney.

“Distract me,” she ordered, rolling toward where I sat in the visitor’s side chair. “Tell me about that movie you and Magnus watched.”

“Which one?”

“I love that you guys are such good friends now you’ve got a list.”

“You do?” I’d been curious about her reaction to Magnus and me spending time together, and I was surprised at how genuinely upbeat she sounded.

“Of course. You’ve needed more friends for a while. Yours keep partnering up. If you’re going to be single, you might as well have a friend like Magnus, who’s a perma-bachelor.”

“Yeah.” Somehow, I managed to agree in a normal tone, even as each word pricked a different part of my soul. Worst of all, all the words were accurate. My friends did keep finding love while I stayed single, likely a permanent state, not unlike Magnus. “It’s not weird?”

“That you and my father-in-law share the same terrible taste in movies?” Maren snorted, then turned more thoughtful. “No. What’s weird is having a father-in-law. Like Diesel and his dad are forever parts of my life now. That’s wild.”

“Yeah.” I swallowed hard. Forever. That was how long I’d have to keep seeing Magnus, regardless of when our fling ended. He’d be at the wedding and every grandchild-related event from now until graduation. Why make that more awkward? He’d acted like it would be fine if others knew, but our interactions would likely be strained enough eventually. No point in adding others to the equation. And the idea of our easy, comfortable friendship turning stilted and stiff made me slump in the hard plastic chair, heels digging in against the tile floor.

“You okay?” Maren propped herself up on her elbow. “You seem down.”

“Just tired.” I forced a smile. “But here for you.”

Her frown deepened. “I shouldn’t have made that joke about how your friends are all falling in love.”

“It’s true though.” I shrugged. I’d had one happy ending. I was at peace, at least most days, with not getting a second. One only got to touch lightning so many times in a lifetime.

“Well, I doubt you have to worry about Magnus partnering up with someone else.” She reached out to pat my shoulder like I was the nervous one. And hell, the mere thought of Magnus dating someone else made me queasier than Maren had been in July. “He’ll stick around and be your movie buddy.”

“Here’s hoping.” I made my voice cheerful. And maybe that was indeed the best possible outcome, Magnus and I continuing some sort of friendship. Movie buddies. Hoping for anything more would be greedy.

“I’m back.” The fifty-something tech with ash-blonde hair and teal nails closed the exam room door behind her. Maren winced at the click, and I took her hand, squeezing tight as the tech took a seat on her rolling stool. “Okay. Let’s have a look at baby. Gender is a surprise, right?”

“Yep.” Maren was stiffer than a fence post in January, even before the tech started arranging drapes and getting out the ultrasound gel.

“I’m right here,” I reminded Maren. “You’re doing amazing.”

“You’re the dad?” The tech had seemingly just now noticed my presence, and her eyes narrowed with something close to disapproval.

“He’smydad. Not the baby’s dad. It’s confusing.”

“I’m the grandpa,” I said confidently for the first time. Maybe Magnus was right, and I was mellowing to the idea at last.

“Okay, Grandpa. And Mom.” The tech started the exam, flipping on a monitor in front of us. “Take a look right there.”

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