Page 4 of Eight Naughty Notes

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TORI

Iwoke up at five am ready to get my day started. I had made it to bed by ten with the help of my favorite vibrating wand, so I was well-rested and ready to face this day. I didn’t have appointments on Thursdays which allowed me to dedicate my day to making my rounds and following up with my patients that needed to speak with me and not my nurse. I was out of the house by six am and at the hospital within twenty minutes.

Some of the things I loved most about working at this Children’s Hospital were the staff and the overall work environment. Most people loved children and hated to see them suffer, so a plethora of measures was taken to ensure not only was the care top-notch, but the environment as well. Walking into this building was like walking into an adult’s friendly playground. Vibrant colors accentuated some of the basic ones, soft fabrics and pillows took up spaces on the floor in place of chairs and couches. Interactive technology was strategically placed around the building throughout the hospital wings, allowing children to engage in something as they waited for appointments or took their walks if in inpatient areas. Despite all of that, walking into this place every day came with mixed emotions. I loved my patients and loved seeing their faces light up for their Dr. Clark and their excitement over the treats I handed out for them doing well with their examinations, but it wasn’t always enough to camouflage the heaviness of sickness that plagued this place. More than half the children that came to this place, have lost the brightness in their eyes, having lost that innocence that said children deserved to be free, have fun, and have no worries. Their bodies took that away from them. They had to listen to adult-talk far too often to be just kids. They were medical experts, some of them, more versed in how much Heparin to administer to clear up blood clots, or how much saline fluid needed to push in order to flush their IVs. They weren’t just kiddos. They were miniature adults at this point. With tired, aching bodies, sad eyes eclipsed by their feeble smiles. All because they didn’t want us, the adults to worry. Here they were sparing us. While in pain, while worried about living a too-short life, about missing out on all the things they’d heard are important to one’s life. They tried to be strong for their parents, their siblings, their doctors and nurses. Everyone that came in contact with them, they put on a face for. So when I walked inside of this building, despite the décor and the festive decorations due to the holiday season, I was immediately reminded of the sadness that sometimes tainted my job and also my responsibility to help staunch it.

I walked brusquely through the lobby and passed the information desk to my right. Gave a quick wave to Ms. Betty who started her shift at 7 a.m. She had just arrived as well and would be headed to get her coffee from the coffee kiosk around the corner near the cafeteria before returning to her post and starting her day.

“Hi, Ms. Betty.”

“Hey Baby. You look busy already, so I won’t hold you. Stop by if you have time to chat later.”

Ms. Betty was never one for formality and didn’t call the doctors, doctor. Instead, everyone was baby to her, and I didn’t mind that one bit. I grew fond of her years ago when I started my residency here. It would take a few more years for me to stop and talk to her about things outside of patient care, but prior to that, even, she was always a kind face, and someone people put a lot of trust in to help start our visitors’ days right. Sometimes we were able to chat about what was happening around the hospital and who she had seen leaving the hospital with whom, but I had a meeting to head into this morning. Last night, I received a text from the medical director asking that I be present for an announcement at seven AM. I usually arrived about that time when not on call anyway, so it wasn’t an inconvenience. It only meant there was no time for gossip. So, I proceeded past the information desk and round the corner to get to the staff elevator. In the hallway stood, I-know-I’m-fine Chet Willis. Chet was a Pedes nurse that had been breaking hearts since he arrived at the Children’s hospital. Between the other nurses, some of the doctors and even the mothers of patients, Chet had them all up in arms. There had been quite a few dramatic moments over who was dating Chet and when it started and ended.

The Pediatric Internal Medicine Clinic where I worked was located within the hospital on the 8th floor. It was isolated from most of what was happening within the building, having its own staff, team of doctors, waiting area, and such. Yet the isolation did nothing to keep the gossip away. Chet and his harem of nurses were still the subject of conversation.

He looked over to me when I got closer and the way his eyes scanned me from head to toe reminded me of how many times I had to shake off his not-so-subtle advances.

“Hey Tori, you’re in early today.”

“Not really. I’m usually in at this time.”

Something about him always made me feel … I couldn’t explain it. But I didn’t like him. Too pretty, too smooth, too knowing of both of those things.

“Not right here. I’m here same time every day, and trust and believe I would have noticed you in this corridor,” he said before licking his bottom lip. Lord.

“Oh well, I usually make another stop before I arrive here. How are you, Chet?”

“I’d feel better if you’d finally let me take you out.”

Inside I was rolling my eyes. “Not gonna happen, Chet.”

“Never say, never.”

He sounded too confident. I didn’t respond because maybe by not responding he would understand there was no way I would be entrusted in him. When the elevator arrived, we both stepped on. Donny Hathaway’s version of This Christmas was playing and of course I want to sing along but unfortunately, I had company. Unpleasant, unwanted, company.

And then it dawned on me. Something that hadn’t been clear until now. That Chet, with his good looks, and his huge, muscled biceps, was a creep. Not with the children he helped?I’d heard he was great with the kiddos. But right here, right now, as he moved closer to me in the elevator, I recoiled. Luckily for me, we arrived on our floor within moments.

I could feel Chet hovering as we left off the elevator, but I sped up hoping that would detach us so that it didn’t look like we were arriving together. Ms. Betty wasn’t the only person that loved to gossip in this hospital and since I only liked to hear other people’s gossip, and not be the subject of it, I didn’t need anyone saying, “Chet and Dr. Clark arrived together.”

But when I walked around the corner and saw a crowd of staff waiting. I looked around and captured the attention of Stephanie Richards, one of the lead nurses for my clinic. When she saw me, she began looking at me strangely, and I knew Chet was still attached to me like glue. Damn!

I looked back to him and received a smirk from him in return. Shaking my head, I walked over to Stephanie and asked the question that had been burning in my mind.

“Good morning, Stephanie. You have any idea why they needed to call this meeting last minute like this?”

Stephanie looked around before leaning into a whisper, “Morning, dear. I was going to call you last night because I didn’t find out until after you left.”

“Find out what, Stephanie?”

“Well, you’re not going to li? …”

Her voice trailed off just as a hush came over the employees. Dr. Hughes, our medical director, slid down the hall with a finesse he was known for. He moved like a Romeo without a care in the world and not as if he managed a fifty million dollar a year budget with one hundred and thirty nursing, patient care support, and administrative staff, along with over thirty physicians and surgeons. He, in his navy double-breasted wool Brioni suit, salt and peppered beard and great looks, gave off the appearance of a tycoon, but Dr. Hughes was one of the sweetest of medical Directors in this hospital. He got mixed emotions from his staff because he himself was a puzzle. Diane, the administrative director, who seemed starstruck at this moment, always acted like she wanted to solve that puzzle and one day I would encourage her because it was obvious she wanted Dr. Hughes. She slid her brown coifed hair, or what little of it that there was, behind her ear and gave a dazzling smile as he walked past the gathered crowd, into the conference room that would be a tight fit for those of us who gathered. Nevertheless, we filed in behind him and took a spot wherever we could. He pulled a few sheets of paper from his leather folder and began speaking.

“I called this meeting to announce a few items. One of which, is the online auction for Christmas Dreams Do ComeTrue is wrapping up. We want to make sure we get those bids in to help with making children’s dreams become a reality. Given children are our focus, it should come naturally. You have until tomorrow, December 1st, to put your bids in. I’m hoping to win a ski trip to the Alps, so be warned, I will pay whatever it takes to get that trip even though I’ve never skied and even though I’d probably break a hip doing it. I want to try something new.” The room broke out into laughter. Dr. Hughes's sporadic sense of humor did a lot to break up the tension from being called into this impromptu meeting. Because we all knew the auction couldn’t have been the biggest of his announcements. Most of us have placed our bids already. I was waiting to hear about the three bids I put in. I crossed my fingers I’d win at least a spa day at one of the premier day spas located downtown.

“Also, the new ICU beds we’ve been waiting for our Pediatric Leukemia wing will be delivered by next Thursday. We heard there were some delays due to US custom issues related to a new surge in the virus that continues to plague the world. But I’ve been assured the delay was temporary and they’ll have the machines on the plane by Friday. If they don’t keep their word, I’ll fly to wherever they are and ship them myself.”

He smiled and then put his paper away. “My last and biggest announcement is behind me. Dr. Powers, come out of hiding, so the staff can see you.

My stomach dropped as I watched Christian Powers, my old love, who up until this moment was hidden away in the corner of the room, moved out from behind a fellow doctor. As if he felt me staring at him, he turned and stared into my eyes until I looked away and at Stephanie who mouth “sorry” to me. Too damn late, Stephanie! Christian stood next to a beaming Dr. Hughes as if Christian came with a rather large donation since money seemed to be one of the main ways to make that man happy.

“Christian Powers, who used to be a resident here a few years ago, decided to come back to be our lead Pediatric Intensivist which is a position I’ve had a hard time filling since Dr. Porter left for Doctors without Borders a year ago. Christian completed his Fellowship in Pediatric Critical Care a year ago and brings with him research experience as well.”

Doctor Hughes continued to talk more about Christian’s experience and the challenges that our Children’s Hospital had been going through that he felt Dr. Powers would be able to assist with, but I could hear none of it. I couldn’t focus on anything else but the fact that the man that I once loved, the man that I once considered sharing a life with, was back here, not only in Pittsburgh but back at the hospital where I worked. And I had to wonder why? Why was he here, when I’m sure he knew I was still here too. Our breakup had not been pretty. Things had been said that afterward I regretted, and things he said to me in response, still burned in my mind. And yet he was here his presence confronting me with my past and there was no way to avoid him. Not if he would be working here.

The next few moments in this impromptu staff meeting went by in a daze, and the moment that it was adjourned, I moved quickly around silent Nurse Richards and maneuvered through the crowd. I could hear Christian’s voice call out for me, even over the other voices, but I would not give him the satisfaction of knowing I heard him. I kept moving towards my escape.

What was I going to do?

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