Page 49 of Shadows of Fate

Not a Damn Thing

Silvana

Raiden and I ended up back at the manor, but not in his office where I expected. We were back in the library, in two of the chairs that overlooked the Forest of Feronia, glasses of blood in our hands. The sky was slowly turning a deep midnight blue, the clouds leisurely rolling in. I knew Raiden’s shadows would cover the windows at any moment, but like a lost girl finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, I didn’t want to miss a single moment until I had to.

I could feel that he was itching to talk, and I understood, truly. But I wasn’t sure where to begin. Was I okay with the bond that linked us? Maybe. Was I okay ruling by his side? Did he even want that? I had no idea. Sure, he called me his queen, but that could easily just be a nickname. I didn’t even fully know what it would entail, being his queen. Or even his mate. Would he expect me to stop killing the filth of this world? What would it mean if I refused? A vigilante queen of the Court of Shadows? I’m sure the rest of the court’s citizens would love that. I scoffed internally.

“I can feel you thinking over there. What’s going through your mind, darling?” Raiden asked quietly.

I glanced at him and then took a sip from my glass, buying myself time. The crimson liquid sat heavily in my stomach. Ever since I tasted him that night, my stomach wanted nothing else but his blood. I guess what they said about mates drinking from each other was truly an option. I swirled my glass for a moment, watching the way it moved and flowed around the clear sides. Wishing I knew for a fact that this conversation would flow the same. Letting out a breath, I looked over at him again—deciding to just be honest.

“I don’t know how this goes, Raiden. I don’t know… how to be… your anything. I don’t know what it means or entails or— What if the entire court hates me? What if they try to usurp you for choosing me? I don’t even know who I am!” By the end, I was yelling at him. Which wasn’t my goal. I was trying to remain calm and collected. Go figure it didn’t work out for me.

Raiden set his glass on the table next to him and then dropped to his knees in front of me, his hands on my thighs. They spread out easily and covered my entire thigh, making me feel petite in a way I never had before.

“Listen to me, and listen well, my little ice queen. I would burn this court to the ground, subjects and all, just to see you smile. I would give up my seat as ruler and run from this place if that is what you wished. I would give up my never-ending quest for revenge and throw away every weapon I own if I thought it would have you agreeing to be mine. There is no one you could’ve been in another life or this life that would make me feel any less for you.” His onyx eyes reflected just how deeply he felt every word he was saying, and it took all of me to continue voicing my worries before agreeing to this.

“I don’t want to be owned, Raiden… I did that before and I… I can’t. Not again,” I whispered.

He sat up on his knees. Reached for my face with one hand and cupped my jaw. “You are mine, as I am yours. You own me just as much as I own you. We are each other’s alone. You and I against the rest of this Fates-damned world, Silvana. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’ve been waiting all of my existence for you, and you couldn’t be any more perfect if I wrote the list out myself.”

“So… you don’t want me to change?” I asked, my tone clearly confused.

“Not a damn thing. I want to begin each day wondering if you’ll fight me at knifepoint or fuck me the same way. I want to watch you torture subjects who deserve such a thing, but only if you let me help kill them by your side. I want to read books by the fire and wake up next to you every sunset for the rest of our existence together.”

The part of this bond that I couldn’t believe was real, was that I couldfeelhis truth. I could feel how much he meant every single word. I could feel that deep in his very soul, his heart beat for me, and me alone.

Without another thought about how wrong this could go, I leaned forward, pressing my lips to his. Where the first kiss we shared nights before was intense and rough, this was gentle. Soul-consuming. Never-ending need rushed through my body for this male, in a way I’d never experienced before. His lips were bruising as the need intensified between us. His hand ran down my jaw and rested around my neck. He gently broke the kiss and looked at me, his ebony eyes peering into the soul he was slowly consuming and claiming as his own.

“Tell me you want this, Silvana. All of it, with me,” he said, his voice pleading. I nodded my head in confirmation, but he growled, “Words, Silvana. I want no confusion on either end about what is beginning here tonight.”

I felt the smile curving my lips as I bit my bottom lip, in the exact way I now knew drove him crazy with lust. “This is what I want, Raiden. I don’t know what it will look like, and I’m terrified of what the future holds. But I’m here, by your side. I’m not going anywhere.”

He inhaled sharply, and I knew it was everything he wanted to hear. He stood, quickly scooping me up to carry me bridal style.

“Where are we going?” I yelped.

“I’m not about to make you my mate, wife, and queen on the floor of the library, darling. Don’t be ridiculous.” He kissed me swiftly and then carried us out of the room and down the hall toward the steps that led to our chambers.

Thankfully we didn’t run into anyone on the way, because being carried by this male was just increasing the level of my arousal by the second.

We crossed the threshold of his room, and he kicked the door shut behind us. Slowly setting me down beside his bed, he stepped back. His hard length already clear through his pants. But instead of touching me like I expected, he turned one of the chairs beside the window to face the bed, and he sat down. Leaning back, his thighs wide, he leaned onto the armrest and sat his chin on his clenched fist.

“Strip, darling,” he ordered, his voice hoarse.

Somehow, I knew this was a small punishment for the way I reacted to this news before. I knew he didn’t blame me for having reservations about it, but it didn’t mean he wasn’t hurt by the rejection.

“I won’t ask again, Silvana. Strip,” he growled, and I realized I hadn’t moved a muscle.

If it was going to get my fangs in this male’s neck while he was buried inside of me? I would do almost anything. I locked eyes with him, only breaking contact for the moments I needed to pull the shirt off my body. I dropped it on the floor and took a step closer to him. Only stopping when he shook his head.

“I want to see all of you, in the light. I want every bit of your body memorized by my eyes, hands, and teeth before the sun dips below the horizon tomorrow evening,” he purred.

I smirked. “As you wish, My Lord.”

I pulled the cloth band off and tossed it with my shirt. Then my boots and leggings. Leaving me in nothing but my shadow stone and silver daggers. I reached down to strip the holsters off my ankles and remove my weapons when he cleared his throat. I glanced up at him, an eyebrow arched.

“Leave the shadow stone, darling. If you don’t mind.” I undid the silver and tossed it on the side table next to his bed, and started to slowly stalk toward him,my male. I stopped when I was standing between his thighs, looking down at his hungry gaze.

---