“I knew something was going on, especially when you started finding reasons to deal with everything alone, but I would have never guessed this,” Sean sighs. “There again, I never thought you would be as careless as you have been with Jasmine's safety.”
“I was protecting Jasmine,” I snap.
“No, Christian, you weren’t,” Sean answers firmly. “If you had been, you would have made sure we were all aware of what was happening. You have put her in danger every time you have been in the same building as her.”
“Terry has been aware of it all from the start and put extra security in place. No one would have gotten near the house or her without someone knowing.”
“But we wouldn’t have known.” Jason looks at me, and I see the hurt in his eyes. “We wouldn’t have known to be weary and what we were looking out for. What if they tried to get to you through us and Jaz? We haven’t been on guard like we should have been.”
I rub my face, knowing that he’s right.
“I know, okay. I know I fucked up, and I’m sorry.” I turn in my seat so that I can see my three brothers. “All I have tried to do is keep you as safe as possible. Let’s face it Tommy didn’t give a shit; if he had, he wouldn’t have dragged us into this mess. Without Mum to protect us from his crap, I had no choice but to step up.”
“We know that, and we are grateful for all you have done for us,” Sean starts, but I shake my head.
“I don’t want you to be grateful; I want you all to be safe!” I’m feeling overwhelmed with it all again, and it shows as my voice gets louder. I take a deep breath in an attempt to calm myself. I look at Jason, who has been by my side for as long as I can remember. “Which means, at times, I have hidden things from you, keeping you out of the loop and protecting you in any way I can.
“Do you really think this is the first time someone has put a price on my head? After all the shit I’ve pulled over the years, do you believe that I haven’t pissed off the wrong person a few times? Because I have, and I have kept you out of it so that you are safe.”
“For fuck’s sake, Christian. How many times have I told you over the years not to hide shit from us!” Jason curses, looking away in anger. “You aren’t the only one Tommy threw to the wolves. I know you were the first to kill, but it was me who had the gun held to his head that night. You think I wasn’t with you every step of the way? Because I was! You aren’t the only person who Jaz’s dad’s death has haunted. He died, so I didn’t; you don’t think I feel guilty about that because I fucking do. Even more so now we know who he was to Jaz and how it affected her.” He takes a deep breath and runs his hand over his face.
“This shit needs to stop, Christian. You need to stop trying to protect us and let us work with you. We only discussed it this morning.”
“You are asking me to go against every instinct I have. You are telling me to ignore my gut, the one thing that has kept us alive for this long. I know it needs to change, but it’s hard.”
“What about when we have kids? Will you continue to pull this shit?” I turn to look at Maximus, who is red in the face. “You keep going on about wanting Shorty pregnant as soon as possible. You know we all want that, but how can we bring a child into this mess? How can we trust you to be the father we know you can be if you don’t keep us in the fucking loop!” He slumps back into his seat and closes his eyes. “I want nothing more than to get married and live our lives with our girl and any children that come along. But right now, I worry that we are putting her in danger just by living with her.” When he opens his eyes, he looks deep into mine; for a moment, I think I see tears.
“I love you, Christian. You have been the only father figure I needed. But-” Maximus takes a deep breath, obviously to calm himself before he continues. “But, if I have to choose between you or Shorty, she will win every time. I will protect her over you, even if that means taking her as far away from you as possible. I will not let her get hurt again, not because of who we are. I will not lose her.”
“I think it’s safe to say we all feel like that,” Jason sighs as I look at him. “We are a team, the four of us. We always have been, but if I had a choice, I would walk away from our lives and never look back. I want nothing more than to pack Jazzy up and take her as far away from this mess as possible. Because losing her isn’t an option, not anymore.”
“I would never ask you to choose me over her,” I point out, looking at each of them. “She is my world and protecting her is my priority. If it ever becomes a choice of saving her or me, then I want you to grab her and run as far away from me as possible. I want you to give her the life she deserves.”
“Yeah, well, hopefully, it will never come to that because, like I said, we are a team, and Jazzy losing a husband isn’t something she will survive.” Jason sits back in his seat and looks out of the window. “There's movement.”
We all turn our attention to the house across the road and see the guy walking out of the house, Mitchell, standing at the door in a dressing gown.
“Take it he had more than a blow job,” Maximus mutters under his breath. I hate people who use their authority over others to get sexual favours out of them. It’s just another form of rape in my eyes.
“Fuck waiting fifteen minutes; I say storm the place now,” Maximus announces behind me. Anxious to get in there and end this shit as much as I am.
“Then let’s get this shit done and go home,” I answer, looking to Jason, who nods in confirmation.
We all get out of the car and give each other a quick nod for encouragement before heading off to our chosen places. Maximus and I head for the front door, Jason and Sean at the back. We have checked everywhere, and there are no other exits other than the windows.
I wait momentarily, giving the others a chance to get into position, as I pull on my leather gloves before knocking on the door.
“I never get why you attempt to be civil. Why don’t you just kick the door down?” Maximus whispers beside me.
“Because this way doesn’t cause anyone to be suspicious of us hanging around.” I look around to check to see if there is anyone walking a dog or driving past, but luckily, the streets are quiet.
I knock again, this time a little louder, to ensure that he will hear me. Checking the windows at the front of the house, I try to work out which room he might be in and if he has seen us. My curiosity is answered when I hear the door being opened.
Mitchell is standing at the door, flicking through some money in his hand, not looking up at us.
“I hope you have change 'cause I don’t,” he mutters, moving some notes into one hand and holding it out in front of him. He finally lifts his head and sees me looking down at him.
“Afternoon, Mitchell.”