“Oh, my sweet summer child…” I settled onto the pillow beside him because my arm was going to sleep, and he shifted onto his side, draping his arm over my stomach. Trailing my fingers along his forearm, I said, “Trust me, there is such thing as a bad blowjob. Usually one that involves teeth.”

Connor shuddered. “Ow. That… doesn’t sound pleasant.”

“It wasn’t. Noteithertime.” I rolled my eyes. “I don’t do three strikes and you’re out—I gave himtwochances, and I thought that wasmorethan generous.”

“You’re a better man than me,” he said dryly. “I wouldn’t have let those teeth anywhere near my dick again, thank you very much.”

“I don’t blame you. I was much younger and more of a people pleaser back then.”

“You’re not a people pleaser anymore?”

The time I’d spent with Tobias flashed through my mind—what little people pleasing had still lingered in me was dead and gone by the time I’d rid myself of him. But I wasn’t going to bring him up and kill the mood, so I just chuckled and said, “You think I’d last as a people pleaser? Pfft. I’m a corpsman.”

He laughed. “Okay, point taken.”

That… actually sobered me. Only someone who was or worked with corpsmen would truly understand how much the job, as much or even more than a lot of military jobs, chewed up and spit out people pleasers.

Connor understood.

Because not only had he been a corpsman himself, hedidwork with corpsmen.

As a physician.

As an officer.

As someone way the fuck above my paygrade, and someone whose bed was not a place I should be if I still wanted to retire with my veteran benefits.

He must’ve seen the sudden shift in my mood, because he touched my face and whispered, “Hey. You still with me?”

“Yeah. Yeah. Just…” I sighed, clasping his hand in mine. “Reminded myself why we shouldn’t be doing this.”

His shoulders fell as he released a breath. “Fuck.”

“I’m… God, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to kill the mood.”

Connor shook his head. “You didn’t. It’s just a reminder that we have to make this count, I guess.”

“There is that.” I let go of his hand and carded my fingers through his hair, reveling in the cool softness and the way he closed his eyes and pressed into my touch. “It sucks. Because under any other circumstances, I’d already be looking forward to doing this again.”

“Me too.” He opened his eyes. “I know it has to be a one-time thing. As much as I want to do it again…” He shook his head. “But… that doesn’t mean I’m in a hurry for it to be over.”

“Neither am I.”

“Good. Because I’ve been dying to be touched, and everything we’ve done…” He exhaled hard. “It’s just so damn good.”

“Yeah, it is. And… dying to be touched? Does that mean it’s been a while?”

He laughed quietly. “That would be an understatement.”

“Yeah?”

Connor nodded. “This is the first time I’ve been touched since before my ex-wife and I separated. It’s…” He exhaled. “I didn’t realize how much I was missing that until now.”

“Yeah?” I smoothed his hair. “How long has that been?”

“We were separated for three years. It was probably…” He rocked his head from side to side. “Close to a year before that, maybe? And that was after a year or two of really sporadically doing anything.”

“Jesus,” I whispered. “I can’t imagine going that long.”