Page 202 of On a Fault Line

“I am really sorry. I read that it’s rather common,” I point out. “Something like one in eight women struggle to conceive.”

Angie nods, looking relieved that she isn’t bottling all of this up inside. I wish she would have mentioned it to us sooner. We could have been more supportive.

“Do you have a backup plan?” Claire asks hesitantly.

“We’ll probably move forward with IUI or IVF then.”

I clear my throat, fighting back my tears. “We are here for you.”

“Always,” Claire chimes in.

I imagine Claire feels weird as we get closer and closer to her due date. It would be hard being pregnant while your best friend is struggling with her own fertility battles.

“See?” Angie asks. “This is what I do… I make things about myself.”

“Nonsense,” Claire says, giving Angie a hug as I join in. “We are in this life together and all the struggles that it brings to us.”

“Things will work out with you, Penny,” Angie says confidently, “just like they will work out for me. It might not be the path we choose but it will be the path that chooses us.”

I allow her words to linger. “I’m not going to beg someone to choose me.” I mean, I basically did already and it didn’t work. “We have been playing this game all this time on uneven fields. And I was just naively stupid for thinking that anyone would want someone broken like me.”

Claire snaps her fingers. “Listen. My rules for getting a man’s attention still apply. It’s?—”

“Please don’t say foolproof,” Angie interrupts.

She shrugs. “It’s basically foolproof.”

“Except it’s not”—Angie gives her a serious stare—“and never is.”

Claire glares at her bestie. “I’m going to choose to ignore your pessimism today and grant you some grace.” Then she turns to me. “The trick to luring a guy in is to act like they are the ones who don’t exist. Men are hunters, and not one of them enjoy easy prey.”

Leaning over, Angie grabs a tissue box from the little decorative side table, and I instantly wonder just how many women have sat on this sofa and poured out their soul with friends. Every ladies’ room needs a comfort couch.

And I’m glad I found mine.

I clear my throat. “And how do I do that?”

“You go out there”—she points to the exit—“and live your best life. We are here to make some money for your dad’s charity. We are not here to soak in the sadness that surrounds us when our overbearing men think they have the upper hand, which they don’t. They have a penis, but we hold the power in the pussy.”

“That’s actually a solid speech,” Angie says in disbelief, making me laugh-cry.

“And I can be your emotional support animal for the night,” Claire says to me.

“Thank you,” I say, wiping my nose.

“And I have zero qualms about kicking that stubborn and pigheaded brother of yours in the nuts. Well, maybe shins.” She taps her finger along her jawline. “Yeah, let’s go with shins since I want more babies with him.”

What was I thinking getting involved in a sexual relationship with my hired bodyguard?

And how did I not fully prepare myself for this all to blow up massively in my face?

But I am here.

And I can do this…even with a shattered heart.

40

PENNY

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