Page 25 of Breaking Her In

Everything in me is screaming to just throw myself into his arms and forgive him, but my heart is still split down the middle, and if I stay here any longer, I might just collapse.

So even though it pains me beyond words, I keep my eyes on the floor and walk around him to the door. His scent fills my nose as I pass, nearly pulling me back, but I keep moving.

Because love shouldn’t feel like this.

And yet every part of me aches for him.

I bite my lip, fighting back my sobs as I take the stairs to the front door and start walking. With any luck, Jess will be here soon, and she’ll get me out of here.

I glance back over my shoulder, but Colt isn’t following me. And that’s when I lose control. I sob into my hands as pain rakes through my chest.

But I put one foot in front of the other and keep walking.

10

COLT

She’s gone.Lena is gone.

The house is too damn quiet now without her. No clinking of dishes, no soft humming under her breath as she makes us both coffees. No fresh footprints in the dust from her designer flats that she wore when she first arrived.

The bathroom still smells like her shampoo. The boots I leant her are still by the door, missing her feet like I’m missing her. Her lip gloss still shines on the edge of the mug we both shared. I can feel her in every breath I take. In every goddamn heartbeat that passes through my chest.

Her presence here was heaven, but now all that’s left is the sound of the wind, the animals, and the hole in my chest where she used to be.

She came crashing into my life like a missile. A loud, sassy, entitled little brat who thought she owned the place. She drove me nuts, but she was also perfect. She flipped my whole world on its ass and lit my cravings on fire. Her laughter, her attitude, her pouty lips just begging for my kiss. That tight little body twisting beneath me as I claimed her, making me feel like a goddamn king.

I did my best to wall myself off from her, but it turns out walls don’t mean a damn when a girl like Lena walks into your life.

Now it’s been two days, and I haven’t slept a wink. When I’m not working, I’m pacing around, replaying everything that happened and how I fucked up the best thing in my life. I can’t get the look out of my mind when she confronted me–when she realized what I’d been hiding from her. I made her feel like she’s some kind of shameful secret instead of the miracle she is.

“It doesn’t matter anymore.”That’s what she said before she stormed off.

Before Ilether run away from me.

God, what was I thinking?

I press the palms of my hands into my eyes, searching for pain that will block out the image of her turning her back on me. She was crying. And it’s all my fault.

I should have stopped her–grabbed her by the wrists and roped her up like a stubborn mare. I should have told her again how much I love her.

But I didn’t. I acted like a goddamn coward.

I thought I was doing the right thing–keeping her safe from her father’s wrath. He’d take his anger out on me for sure, but she’d face it too. At first I thought averting my eyes would work. But when that failed, I thought we could hide things, stay in the shadows, even if it meant rarely seeing each other once she went back to the city. But now?

Now she’s just…gone.

These last two days have felt like months. I’ve been waiting for her father to show up with a brigade of men ready to beat the shit out of me–or the call that I’ve been fired and I need to pack my shit and get out–but so far nothing’s happened. All that can mean is he’s planning something dramatic to really sink the dagger deep.

I walk outside and pace the porch, my hands gripped tightly at my sides. I need somewhere to go, something to do to rid myself of this restlessness. But it’s useless. Not even the hardest work on the ranch can get my angel out of my mind. Nothing can stop this ache.

Everywhere I go brings up thoughts of her. How she used to follow me around in those short-shorts, pestering me just to try and get a reaction out of me. Those tiny little accidental touches that would get my desires pumping.

Lena made me weak, and even though I fought it then, I now know I loved every second of it.

I rub my face with my hand, then stalk over to the barn like I’m in a trance.

Despite the smell of hay and horses, Lena’s scent is still there. It may be faint, but it’s unmistakable. The vanilla of her shampoo andher. God, it hits me so hard that I have to brace myself against the wall.

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