Page 40 of Victorious: Part I

Staring out the window.

Trying to contemplate what the hell I do from here.

Inhaling sharply, my stomach churns, thinking of Livvy. She was such a sweet woman. She didn’t deserve to go out like that. I can’t even imagine what Poppy and the pres are going through—or Haven, for that matter. But after visiting my mother in prison right before all this shit went down, I can’t shake the feeling that Mom’s in the same kind of trouble as Livvy.

I’d managed to talk to Alpha about it before I left to ride back to the clubhouse, but by the time I rolled in, it was fucking mayhem. Shouting. Brothers pacing and yelling. The kind of chaos that makes your gut drop before you even know why.

No one noticed I’d walked in.

No one gave a damn I was even there.

Alpha was dead center of it all, fury radiating off him like heat from a firestorm. Loki was up in his face, trying to calm him down, one hand raised like he was approaching a caged animal—but Alpha wasn’t hearing any of it. He shoved Loki hard enough that he nearly hit the wall.

Then I caught it—Haven’s voice on the phone, sharp and panicked, talking about Livvy. How they were both at the hospital, and Livvy was bad—realbad.

That was all it took.

We were back on the bikes, riding hard, and the sick feeling twisting in my gut told me whatever had gone down, shit was only going to get worse from here. And as much as my head was still full of thoughts of my mom, there wasn’t time to even fucking process it.

I haven’t been able to talk to Alpha since. Nor did I think it appropriate to bring it up again, considering. But the fact remains—my mother’s in trouble in there, and while I completely understand I have to give Alpha the time he needs to grieve, I don’t want to add my mother’s name to the list of people we need to be grieving today.

Trust me, I know how callous that makes me sound. I’m not devaluing Livvy’s death at all. I just don’t want to lose my mother in whatever the fuck is happening in California right now too.

Suddenly, a chair slides out, and I glance to my left where Loki’s moving to sit beside me. Without saying anything, I shift my gaze back to the window to continue watching the sunrise.

Loki clears his throat. “Rhyan still in bed?” he asks in a hushed voice.

“Yeah, I thought I’d let her sleep. It’s been a pretty big few days,” I reply, my voice low, gruff.

Loki nods slightly. “I left Bea in bed too. After her dealing with the Governor, and now all this.” He lets out a long breath, swiping his hand through his hair, which is unusually down and out of his man bun this morning. “I dunno, brother. Something feels off. I’m letting Alpha have his time with Poppy and Haven right now, but my skin’s itching. I don’t like how this feels so… premeditated.”

I turn to face him, my brows furrowing at his words. “What do you mean?”

He spins in his chair, his attention fully on me now. “What happened to Livvy took planning. It wasn’t an opportunistic grab. What I’ve managed to get from Alpha is that Rico’s nephew, Javier, has relaunched the Cartel to defend his uncle’s name. But I don’t know, there’s more at play here. I think the Cartel’s been playing us. We just don’t know who the fucking players are.”

Groaning, I curl up my lip. “Well, that’s a great thought before I’ve even had breakfast.”

Loki hums under his breath in agreement, then turns back to face me. “Hey, you went to visit your mom before all this shit went down. She doing okay in there after all this Governor crap?”

Slumping further down into my seat, I cross my arms over my chest in defeat. “I called Alpha from the prison shortly before I left, right as everything started unraveling here at the clubhouse. I don’t know what’s happening in there, Loki, but Mom’s rattled. Seems like new inmates are heading in, and they’re all part of this gang mentality. They have matching tattoos, which isclearlypart of the initiation.” I scrub my hand through my hair. “I dunno, brother. Mom seemed anxious. And you know her, that woman doesnotscare easily.”

Loki raises a brow. “All right, Alpha needs time to deal with his shit. But in the meantime, I’ll do some digging, see what I can find.”

“Even the guards warned me, Loki. I feel like shit’s about to kick off in there.” I crane my neck, my emotions starting to overwhelm me. “I don’t want to end up like Alpha, VP.”

He puffs out a long breath of air and grips my shoulder just as Haven walks out into the clubroom, making her way over to the bar, and starts talking quietly to Navy. Loki peers at her, then stands abruptly, dragging me with him. “C’mon, brother. Let’s go see what we can find out.”

Raising my brow, I stand abruptly and walk with Loki toward the bar, not knowing where he’s going with this. As we approach, Haven quietly talks to Navy across the bar. “Yeah, he didn’t get much sleep. He was watching Poppy all night who, thankfully, did get some rest. I have a feeling today’s gonna be alooongday.” Haven weakly smiles.

Navy gently nods in response, then asks, “So, coffee then?”

Haven groans like that’s the best suggestion she could have ever made. “Fuck, yes. Navy, you are a queen!”

She winks at Haven, then moves off toward the kitchen as Loki and I step up next to Haven.

Loki is the first to speak. “Morning, how’s the presreallydoing?”

Haven raises her brow, then slowly shrugs. “He’s coping by using his anger. His thirst for vengeance, if that’s what he needs to get through this for now, then I’m on board with it. We can deal with hisactualgrief and how it hits after we are done with Javier and the Cartel.”

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