Page 34 of Reconcile

“He won’t hurt her, and he’s grown up,” Lola assures me.

I can’t help thinking they’re biased as hell, but I turn to watch the guys playing with the kids again.

And I let myself get swept away in the moment.

Audrey has never had this. Sure, she’s had some friends from school, but we haven’t attended any parties yet. And she’s never had a father figure.

I hate my treacherous body for responding when he picks her up and tickles her, making her giggle. I hate my heart for squeezing tightly in my chest as I watch her whisper something in his ear that makes him laugh.

But I can’t seem to help it. I never allowed myself to go there before. I never wanted to dream about what it could be like if Sawyer wouldn’t have been a lying cheater and I’d told him about my pregnancy.

Would we have ended up here?

21

SAWYER

“Baz isn’t too bad.” Audrey tilts her head to the side, like she’s thinking it over even though I didn’t actually voice a question. “But I think I like Jacee better.”

I grin at that as I hold her small hand in mine and we walk into her room with Piper in tow. “I’m still very okay with that.” She plops down onto her pink bed, and I kneel down in front of her, in awe of how similar her eyes are to the ones I see every day in the mirror. But hers sparkle. “Hang on to that.”

“Sawyer,” I hear Piper from behind me, and I can’t stop my laugh.

Today was fun.Really fun.

I always have a good time at Ash and Viv’s, but tonight was different. I got to spend time with Audrey. The kid is a giggler. She laughs at everything. So different from the way I remember Piper when she wasn’t too much older than Audrey is now.

She also hates pickles. And her favorite color is pink.

The kid is an open book, and I took full advantage to get to know her better.

Piper walks to the dresser, it’s white but has rainbow handles. She pulls it open and pulls out a nightgown. “It’s definitely past your bedtime, missy.”

Audrey pouts for a moment but then kicks her shoes off, and then... yeah, the kid giggles. Which makes me laugh. “Okay, Mommy.” She looks at me as Piper dresses her in a nightgown. “Can we do that again?”

I nod my head, a thrill shooting through me at her asking. “Yeah. They do that a lot, and I’m usually invited.” I grin. “Which means now, you are too.”

“And Mommy?”

Piper looks slightly uncomfortable as she runs a brush through Audrey’s hair. I face Audrey. “Of course, Mommy too.”

Her smile is vibrant. “Good.”

Piper kisses her forehead. “Get good sleep tonight, baby.”

“Okay, Mommy. Love you.”

“Love you.”

Piper walks toward the door, and I stand next to Audrey’s bed, unsure how to leave it. She can’t know I’m her dad, so I can’t exactly say I love you. But I don’t want to just say goodnight.

Fuck, this is hard.

“Thanks for going with me tonight, kiddo. I’m glad you had fun.”

“Thank you, Swearer,” she says, and I laugh.

“Baz tell you to call me that?”

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