Page 100 of Our Secrets and Scars

“Yeah?” His eyes flare with hope and soaring relief.

“Yeah.” I nod. “More than enough.”

“I’ll earn back your trust, Kinz,” he says earnestly. “I swear it.”

I reach up to cup his cheek. “You already have.”

“Really?”

“Really. I know that you’ll never intentionally hurt me and I understand why you couldn’t tell me who you were. And if I’m being truly honest, I’m glad you didn’t. Because you were right in your letter, I wouldn’t have continued writing to you if I knew how you were connected to the accident. Everything was still so raw back then that I wouldn’t have been able to see you for anything other than the man who was imprisoned for the worst thing that has ever happened to me. So, yeah, maybe it wasn’t the right thing to do, but I guess everything worked out for the best. Maybe it was fate finally looking out for us.”

His lips are on mine before I’ve even finished talking. But I don’t mind. Because he kisses me with such devotion that I’ve never before felt so cared for. So safe. So loved.

And just like that, the electricity that had waned while we spoke returns in a sparking, galvanic surge. My core throbs from the force of it, and my body begins to tremble once again.

“Touch me, Holden,” I beg.“I need you so fucking bad.”

“I know, baby,” he whispers against my mouth. “I need you too.”

“So do something.Anything.”

“Anything?” He lifts an eyebrow, eyes twinkling with the promise of a secret.

I nod frantically because it’s true. He can take anything from me, and I’d let him have it all, no questions asked. Because despite everything, I trust him wholeheartedly. And maybe that makes me naïve and stupid, I don’t know, but I truly believe that Holden will never hurt me again. At least, not intentionally. My heart is safe with him, I know that implicitly.

Trust can be broken, but the love I hold for him is unconditional.

“Then I want you on my face.”

“What?” I blink.

“You heard me, little one,” he growls. “Come here and sit on my fucking face.”

I hesitate for a moment, a small burst of anxiety releasing tiny little butterflies in my stomach because this is something I’ve never done. It’s a position that requires total vulnerability.

But one tiny reassuring tilt of his lips is enough to settle my nerves, and with a hitched breath, I do as he demands. Lifting onto my knees so that I’m facing the headboard, I move to straddle him.

“No.” Holden halts me with a strong hand on my thigh. “The other way.”

My eyes narrow in confusion.

“Turn around and straddle my face so that you’re looking down my body.”

I do as he says, slowly lowering myself, my knees on either side of his head.

“Now sit down,” he orders but doesn’t even give me a chance to obey before he’s curling his hands around the tops of my thighs and pulling me down hard.

When he told me to sit on his face, I didn’t realize he meant it literally. But I was wrong. I was oh so fucking wrong. Because he’s taking my entire weight right now as his tongue slips inside my pussy and then drags up to swirl around my clit. All the while, he’s moaning like it’s the best thing he’s ever done.

I’m writhing on top of him, my hips grinding down of their own volition. My hands scramble for something to hold on to, the sheets, his chest, but nothing works to anchor me enough to truly lose myself in the magical ministrations of his tongue.

Holden’s hand slides up my back and applies firm but gentle pressure. It takes a moment for me to understand his intention, and then, like a camera flash, it clicks. The reason he wanted to do this was to have me in this position and facing this precise direction.

It’s a position that is sensual, erotic, downright pornographic even, but it’s also incredibly vulnerable. Because like this, we’ll be open to each other. And I don’t mean that in just the physical sense, but to bare ourselves to each other in this way will be a first for us both. It’s a way of promising that we have nothing left to hide. No secrets, no scars, no parts of our bodies that we haven’t shared with each other.

So, while doing this with Holden should maybe make me feel exposed and unguarded, it doesn’t. It probably would if it was anyone else underneath me right now, but with him, I feel nothing but safe and assured.

I take him in my mouth and suck him with the same fervor he’s currently using to eat my pussy. He groans, this incredible, guttural sound that vibrates across my sensitive skin and makes me shiver against him. So he does it again and again until I’m a trembling mess on top of him.