Page 34 of Lovers in Lockdown

Honey

Noah has declared war on my vagina.

That sounds wrong on so many levels, but take it up with him if you have an issue with it because this is all his fault.

And hey, while you’re there, tell him he’s a doucheface and will never get me to beg him to do anything.

Ever.

He’s not even that good of a kisser.

Okay, that was a total lie. His kissing skills are off the charts. If kissing was an Olympic sport, he would win gold. If kissing was a Nobel Prize, then trust me Noah would be cashing in the million-pound prize. If kissing was a country, Noah would be president. No, he would be the king.

And don’t even get me started on what he can do with his tongue. His oral skills are the stuff of filthy legends and they took me places no man ever has before.

But I digress.

If Noah thinks he can beg me to do anything, then he is sadly mistaken. Even if it means hiding in the bedroom for the rest of my lockdown days, washing myself in makeup wipes and not even leaving the room for meals, then so bloody be it.

Worst comes to worst, I’ll just feed on the banana plant Reid keeps on his windowsill.

I will do what needs to be done to make sure I stay clear of Noah’s lips.

And tongue.

God, that tongue.

But I am Honey Matthews and I refuse to be defeated by some six-foot-four pretty boy who can do more than just cook in the kitchen.

My stomach growls, but I’m too angry to eat. Besides, another taste of that creamy sauce will only serve as a reminder of what happened right after Noah made me try it and I’m doing my utmost to get the image of his head buried between my legs out of my mind. To no fucking avail.

Trying to force out the memory of his dexterous tongue only makes me remember more the unspeakable things it did to me.

Shit. I need a pep talk. Need to remember I’m a badass bitch who can resist the delicious temptations of a certain long-tongued chef and there’s only one woman for the job.

Honey:You up?

Ellie:Always. What can I do you for, my lady?

Honey:You’re so weird. How did you know I needed something?

Ellie:I read your mind from halfway across the country with my sixth-sense.

Honey:Oh, yeah?

Ellie:Yep, no lie. So, what do you need?

Honey:Okay, are you sitting down? I’m gonna need you to take a few deep breaths before I tell you this.

Ellie:I’m ready.

Honey:Noah went down on me in the kitchen. And it was amazing. Like top-notch, toe curling, forget-my-own-name amazing. But I stopped it before we went any further and now Noah has basically declared war on my vagina.

Ellie:*facepalm emoji*

Ellie:Are you an idiot?

Honey:Excuse me?

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