Page 50 of Protection for Rowan

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

He cupped her face, kissing her gently. “We don’t have to.”

“I want you.”

This time, his kiss was more demanding. She leaned into it, needing the closeness. Excitement skittered through her.

Shine ran his hands over her back and down to her butt. She needed to feel more and wiggled closer. Being up against Shine was amazing. What they’d had before he’d left for his mission and she’d been abducted was back, or she thought it was.

She ran her hands over Shine’s chest to his back and then down to his butt. He felt so good in her arms. Soon, they were both pulling each other closer. Desperation sizzled between them. She needed to have Shine naked up against her.

Shine picked her up and wrapped her legs around his waist. If only they were naked. He adjusted her so her pussy was up against him. The friction was almost enough to push her over the edge.

He carried her to the bed, laid her in the center, and then stretched out beside her. His weight on her felt good for a second, maybe more. Then, a whisper of panic slid down her spine. Her lungs didn't seem to want to work. She tried taking in a breath, but it was too difficult.

Suddenly, she wasn't in Shine's bed. It was dark, and her arms were tied down. Then, the jerk was on top of her. The whisper of panic wasn't a whisper any longer. It was a full-blown rage inside that threatened to overwhelm her.

She sat up, gasping for breath, pushing away thegrabbing arms, trying to get free. Her mind twisted the situation, forcing her back into that place. He was coming for her. He would attack her again, and she would never escape.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Shine’s voice sounded like he was far away, on the outside of the walls she built to protect herself.

She pushed, trying to free herself, but nothing was holding her back, so when she pushed, she ended up on the floor. Shine was right there. She turned to face him, horror filling her.

“Oh God. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to?—”

“It’s okay. We should have taken things slower.”

She shook her head. “I don’t know if slower would have made a difference.”

“It’s okay.”

“How can you say that? What if I can’t ever—what if I’m never able…”

He leaned his forehead against hers. “We can get help. I’m here for you.”

“You shouldn’t be. You don’t deserve this.”

He pulled back enough to meet her gaze but was still close enough she had to blink to focus. This close, she could see the brown flecks in his eyes mixed with a little green. They were beautiful eyes, and a part of her wanted to study them, but she couldn't bring herself to open that much for him.

Hiding the shame and fear seemed more important than opening for Shine. They couldn’t live like this. She wanted to run, but running wouldn’t solve anything.

“I want us to find someone to talk to. Like together. I think it’s time for both of us to go in and talk.”

She shook her head. “No. It’s just me. Not you.”

“We’re trying to build something, right?”

She couldn't deny him that truth, though her answer sounded hesitant. "Yes."

He nodded. “Then that settles it. We need to find someone who can help us overcome this.”

Worry pelted her, making her shoulders dip in. “What if I can’t?”

“Can’t what?”

“Can’t recover. What if I’m like this forever? I don’t know that I can get past this.”

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