Page 71 of The Nanny Goal

“I’ll make the coffee,” I whisper before darting past him and down the stairs, as if I’m being chased. By him. By the kiss. By the stupid sounds I made while he kissed me.

I fire up the espresso machine and pretend that my lips aren’t still swollen and my panties aren’t probably soaked.

If he’d wanted to have sex, I’d have gone along with it, I’m sure.

I willnotthink about how his bare skin felt under my fingers.

Nope.

As I finish making the second cup of espresso, Alexei strides in holding Inessa. I slide it to him, then grab her a sippy cup of milk and a muffin.

She sits in her highchair without argument, and if I hadn’t made out with her father to start the day, I’d think that was another win.

“Do you like eggs?” he asks, as if this we’re having a normal post-road trip morning.

“I can make them,” I mumble, not looking at him.

“I’m offering.” And there’s an edge to his voice now, that says maybe it’s not a completely normal morning for him.

He leans against the counter beside me, arms folded over that broad, bare chest. He makes the kitchen feel way too cozy, makes it feel as small and intimate as the library upstairs.

“Actually,” I say, my voice pitching a little high, “since it’s your day off, I thought I’d go out for a bit.”

“This early?”

“Yeah.” I force a shrug. “Becca said something about a Pilates class. And I need to do some shopping.”

Although instead of going to buy more clothes, I should be buying a plane ticket straight back to Minneapolis.

No, I don’t need to run away. I simply need to get away from his bare chest for a few hours.

His brow lifts, but he just nods slowly. “Okay.”

“Cool,” I say, not soundingcoolat all. “Great. What time do you need me back?”

“Take all the time you want. We’ll be fine all day. We’ll go to the hospital, won’t we, little one? Shall we visit Baba?”

“Emmy too,” Inessa said solemnly.

I shake my head. “I gotta run some errands, baby girl. You know how you don’t like to go to six different places? That’s what I’m going to do this morning. Go toall the placesin one morning so I don’t have to do that with you tomorrow and the next day!”

She laughs, like I’m being silly, but five days into knowing her, I’m completely serious. Our days just go better when we have one thing to do in the morning, one thing to do after a nap, and that’s it.

I shoot back my own espresso and then hightail it back upstairs, to the scene of the kissing crime.

The first thing I do is text the WAG chat to see if Becca really is going to a Pilates class this morning. The next thing I do is search for a walk-in clinic that is open this morning, because the way that Alexei looks at me isn't safe, and I’m not the innocent girl from two years ago.

I don't think that accepting this job was a mistake. He needs my help right now, andInessaneeds me right now.

But it's getting harder and harder to separate the professional from the personal.

Maybe there’s another reason that I’m here right now, something private and intimate. Maybe we have unfinished business to deal with, Alexei and me.

I know that he’s not the person for me.

He's too worldly and I'm too much of a Midwest college girl. Deep down, I will always be that person when it comes to him. My heart is too soft, too innocent despite my effort to change, for me to enter into what I'm sure would be an incredibly hot fling with my boss.

So I’m going to resist the pull between us.

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