Cam takes one of my hands and folds it in his, pressing a kiss to my knuckles in a way that’s both lovely and infuriating. “Next time. First, go out on your date. Then come and tell us how it went.”
CHAPTER35
STELLA
Ido my best to clear my mind of Cam and Wyatt before my dinner with Brandon, but it’s an impossible feat. At best, I only manage it for a few minutes at a time.
I leave Jessie at home with Marissa, telling her that her dad and I are going out to run errands. We all went to the park again earlier, and Brandon, who’s staying at a hotel nearby, returns to pick me up, freshly showered and changed into nice pants and a button-down shirt.
Cam pops into my mind when I notice how high Brandon’s shirt is buttoned up, and when I notice the outline of his undershirt. Cam never wears an undershirt over his spectacular pecs. The word pectacular pops into my head, and I almost giggle as we walk to Brandon’s car, but I keep it inside.
He asked earlier if I have a favorite local restaurant, and I thought about the places I went with Cam and Wyatt, but it would be much too distracting to go to one of those restaurants, and possibly out of Brandon’s budget.
We end up at a family restaurant, nothing fancy, but the food is good. We spend at least half the night talking about Jessie. It’s inevitable. As her mom, I could talk about her nonstop, but I rein in that impulse when I’m with others, especially people who don’t have kids. But if anyone should want to hear all about her, it’s Brandon, and he does.
It’s nice to have this in common with him, but when I purposely switch to other topics, like TV shows, movies, and even current events, the conversation becomes stilted on both our parts. I even dredge up memories from college, though it’s a bit of a sore subject for me, but nothing sparks.
I can’t help but notice the distinct absence of laughter during our date, putting it in sharp contrast to my nights out with Cam and Wyatt.
Brandon is a nice enough guy, and he’s definitely matured, but it’s hard to imagine a spark igniting.
On the drive back to my house, I wonder if I should kiss him goodnight, just to see if I feel anything. We must have kissed that one night in college, but I can’t specifically remember doing so, so it’s hard to imagine that it was anything special.
Glancing over at his profile, and listening to him talk about his favorite sports team, I can’t find anything that reminds me why I crushed on him for so long years ago, and I decide to stop hunting for something that’s no longer there.
I have it bad for my neighbors. When my mind wanders, it’s always daydreaming of being with them—back on the beach, standing in the grass in my back yard, and especially in their living room, where I’m naked and letting them do whatever they please.
As Brandon pulls into the driveway, I tell him that he’s welcome to move nearby, and that Jessie would enjoy seeing more of him, but there’s no point in us trying to force a romantic relationship.
What I don’t say is that while it might be good for Jessie to have her parents together, I want her to see me in a loving relationship, not just one of convenience or a last resort.
Someday, I hope she finds a man who adores her, and I deserve the same for myself.
If there’s one thing tonight has made clear, it’s that I need to follow my heart.
CHAPTER36
WYATT
Cam’s confident about how Stella’s date will go, but I can’t quite get there.
He and I are both spending the evening in the garage, where he’s working out on the weight bench and I’m cleaning out a tool chest. What I’m actually doing is traveling through the land of worst-case scenarios.
First of all, I don’t trust the guy she’s out with. He may keep current on child support payments, but that’s most likely due to court orders. It doesn’t mean he has good intentions, and it definitely doesn’t mean he wants what’s best for Stella.
In the darkest corners of my mind, the asshole is currently strong-arming her into doing something she doesn’t want to do. Or maybe he’s playing a pity card, or using her concern for her daughter as a tool of persuasion.
When I’m not worrying about what that jerk might be up to, I imagine that it’s Stella who decides all on her own that she’s better off with a stable, if underwhelming man, rather than two guys who make their living transmitting shirtless pictures of themselves across the interwebs.
One night out with her respectable yet boring “ex” will convince her that Cam and I could never be the right choice for her and her daughter.
“He’d better not be blowing smoke up her ass and making more false promises.” Cam’s out-of-the-blue comment jolts me from my ruminations.
“Yeah …” I finish rearranging the wrench drawer with more force than necessary. “Do you think Stella is uncomfortable with the type of work we do?”
“I don’t know, but I know she wants to be with us.”
“And what about the fact that there are two of us? Might be fine for going out on dates, but maybe she can’t picture herself settling down with two men.”