Page 44 of Preacher

“I gotta say, I’ve never seen you like this before. It’s clear he’s gotten to you, and if he managed to do that, he’s gotta be alright.”

Hearing him say that made my tears fall even harder.

He pulled me into a hug, and even though I knew it would only make me cry harder, I let myself lean into it. No one on earth could hug me like him, and at that moment, I couldn’t imagine needing anything more. My face was buried in his chest as I muttered, “I’m scared.”

“It’s okay to be scared. Just don’t let your fear keep you from doing something that might make you happy. Because if anyone deserves to be happy, it’s you.”

Maybe he was right.

Maybe it was time I let myself find my happiness, even if the idea of it scared the hell out of me. I wiped the tears from my eyes as I said, “Okay. I’ll think about it.”

“Don’t. You overthink everything. You’ll just end up talking yourself out of it and regretting all your life choices.” He chuckled. “For once, just go for it. Just for the hell of it. If it doesn’t work out, it’s not the end of the world.”

“You really think?”

“I do, but don’t tell Sergei that I gave the okay, or I’ll never hear the end of it.”

“My lips are sealed.” I reached over and gave him a hug. “Thank you, Nikolai.”

He gave me a squeeze, then turned and started for the door. “Don’t stay out too late. You know how Sergei worries.”

“You think I should go see himnow?”

“No time like the present.”

“But I don’t know where to find him.”

“I’ll text you the address.” Before he walked out, he stopped and faced me. “Just because I’m telling you to go for it doesn’t mean you don’t need to be careful. If you have any trouble, you call me, and I’ll handle it. And I mean any trouble at all.”

“I got it.”

He nodded, then walked out and closed the door behind him.

I stood there for a moment, thinking about everything he’d said, and there was one comment that stood out above the rest.You overthink everything. You’ll just end up talking yourself out of it and regretting all your life choices.

He was right. I overthought everything and usually ended up talking myself out of taking any real chances. I didn’t want to keep making the same mistake, so I took my soup and dumped it in the sink. I took a couple of deep breaths, and then I went to my room to change.

I put on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt, then slipped on a couple of my favorite bracelets and my boots. I brushed out my hair, and after a quick check in the mirror, I grabbed my keys and made my way downstairs. Once I’d locked up, I started out to my car. When I passed Faith’s stall, I peeped my head in and smiled when I found her eating.

Hudson was so thoughtful to fix her stall, especially after the way I’d ended our date. I hoped it was a sign that I hadn’t completely ruined things between us. That was a thought that clung to me as I made my way to the car. I got inside, and as I started the car, my heart did this stutter-step thing, like it couldn’t decide if it was excited or terrified.

I knew the answer.

I was both.

The drive to the clubhouse wasn’t far, but my nerves made it feel longer. When I pulled up, the first thing I noticed was the size of the place. It looked more like a compound than an actual clubhouse. There was a tall security fence that wrapped around the entire property, and there was a gate out front that was guarded by two men.

As soon as I rolled to a stop, the larger of the two men came over to my window and asked, “Can I help you?”

“I’m Tabitha.” My voice sounded strained, so I cleared my throat and continued, “I’m here to see Hudson… I mean, Preacher.”

He eyed me for a second, then pulled a radio from his belt and stepped back. His words were mumbled as he spoke into it, making it difficult to hear what was being said. A few moments passed before he gave me a short nod and waved me through. “You’re good. Pull on in and park up front. Someone will be out to meet you in a minute.”

“Okay. Thanks.”

My heart started to pound even harder as I eased through the gate and parked at the front. I hadn’t even turned off the engine when the door opened, and a young man stepped out. When he started towards me, I got a better look at him and remembered meeting him when the guys helped at the barn. I smiled as I closed my door and said, “Hey.”

“Hi, Ms. Volkov. It’s good to see ya again.”

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