Page 48 of Bending The Rules

“I’m sorry,” he said, shaking his head. “I just… I called myself surprising you. I probably should have called first. But… we never did really have that talk.”

“Russell… if you wanted to talk, you should have called,period. We can say what we need to say over the phone.”

He blinked. “Wow. So… you really are done then?”

“I don’t see how I could be anything else. We aren’t on the same page. I can’t give you what you want.”

“We’re still young,” he said, grabbing my hands. “I messed up, by breaking up with you. It was stupid, and selfish of me to push you about starting a family. I get it, Toni. You’re still building your publishing company, you’re still grinding. You’re not ready to slow that down and think about kids, none of that. But… we wouldn’t have to think about that right away. We can take our time to plan the wedding, get married, have a long honeymoon. Enjoy each other for a few years,thentalk about kids.”

“Why are you trying to force this, Russell?” I asked, shaking my head.

“Because I love you.”

“Do you?” I shrugged. “Didyou? Cause I would thinklovewould have kept you from breaking my heart while I was alreadybroken.So did you love me, or were you just used to me? Decided I would make a suitable wife, and then when you realized that a key element of my suitability was missing… you dumped me. And now, you call that a mistake, but I don’t think it was. Because it gave me to time to wonder if I really lovedyou.”

Russell swallowed hard, pushing his hands into his pockets. “And what did you decide? Did you love me?”

“I did.Did.”

His eyebrow twitched. “Wow. Ouch.”

“That’s the same thing I said when I realized you were breaking up with me.”

“So that’s all? That’s just… it? Even with me saying that I’m willing to step back, and compromise… nothing?”

“Everything good?”

I looked up to see Justin standing a few feet away from where Russell and I were talking, in my open door.

Russell looked up too, and once he saw Justin, turned back to me and scoffed. “So is this why you didn’t even invite me inside to talk? You’re dressing up for this dude? What, are you fucking him now?”

“Adjust your tone, my man,” Justin said, taking a few steps forward, but not getting between us.

Russell scowled, turning fully in Justin’s direction, hands raised. “This isn’t any of your business, okay? I’m just talking to her.”

“Okay. Say what you need to say… but adjust your fucking tone when you’re talking to her.” Justin took a few more steps, resting against the wall beside my door.

“Or what?” Russell asked, moving into Justin’s personal space. Justin didn’t move from the wall, just gave him a disrespectfully bored smirk.

“Or I might kick your ass.” Justin chuckled, then looked at me, raising a quizzical hand in Russell’s direction. “Who is this dude? “Or what?” Is he serious?” Justin laughed again, and I had to bite the inside of my lip to keep from laughing too.

“I am, actually.” Russell made what I clocked as a mistake, and stepped into Justin’s face. “You think you can come out of nowhere and take Toni from me?”

Justin straightened up, jaw clenched as he stared Russell down. “I’ve known Baby Girl since she was eight years old, bruh. I didn’t come out of nowhere.” That disrespectful ass smirk came back as Justin leaned in. “And let me tell you a secret… I can’t take what’s not yours.Sheisn’t yours.”

“That’s not up to you.”

Justin chuckled. “You’re right,” he said, pointing at Russell for emphasis. “It’s not. It’s up to her. And I think she made herself clear. Now if you don’t mind, we don’t want to be late for our plans.”

“And what if I do mind?” Russell asked, getting too loud, too close, and too aggressive – evidenced by the way Justin’s hands immediately went up to shove him out of his space.

“Then you can get your ass kicked, like I already told you,” Justin said, in a deep rumble that pulled at my belly. Justin advanced on Russell, who looked shocked to seethisside of “Mr. Bestseller”. “Who the fuck are you running up on, getting loud with? Donot,” Justin warned, finger in Russell’s face as he spat the words out, “let the literary accolades fool you into thinking I won’t mop the floor with your stupid ass, okay?”

“Okay,” I said, squeezing between them. I knew from experience that Justin was, at this moment, hyper-aware of my presence, and wouldn’t swing if there was a chance of hurting me. I pushed him back, then turned to Russell. “What the hell are you doing?” I whispered, trying to save some of his pride. “You don’tfight,fool! Justin willliterallymop the floor with you. I’ve seen him do it.”

“So youhaveknown him since you were a kid?” Russell asked, nostrils flared as he stared over my shoulder to where Justin was standing.

I nodded, trying not to meet his eyes. “Yes. Twenty-three years. He was my best friend.”

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