Page 90 of Exclusive

“I’m that, too. I was just so taken aback when you asked me to dinner. Up until then, you’d shown no real signs of reconsidering…us.”

I had to choose my words carefully here because this was delicate ground. “We had something really good. The least I could do is…try.”

“And how’s it going?”

“Well, you danced with my dog and told me I looked pretty. But I’m still grappling with the stuff from months ago.”

She pulled the car into a parking space. “Here’s the thing.” She looked around, clearly agitated. “Um…let’s get out of the car.”

I frowned and did as she asked, curious. The parking lot of the restaurant wasn’t full, but there were handfuls of nicely dressed people coming and going from beneath the maroon awning that marked the entrance. Carrie didn’t care.

“I’m trying to imagine sitting in a restaurant and exchanging witty banter, flirting with you, and talking about the amazing qualities of the food when none of that matters.”

“It doesn’t?” I frowned, trying to follow.

“All that matters is you understanding something very important, and I can’t go another minute until you do.”

“Okay.” My heart squeezed uncomfortably because we wereentering territory that left me feeling exposed, without armor. She placed her palm flat against mine and threaded our fingers. “You’re everything.” She paused to let the words work. “You’re not a piece of the puzzle for me. Not one of a handful of details. Not a contributing factor. But myeverything.” She swallowed and I could see how nervous she was. This was a woman who went in front of thousands of people daily, unflappable and calm. Nothing like the vulnerable, flustered, heart-on-her-sleeve version I saw standing in front of me. But it was the words she spoke that toppled my resistance. I meant that much? I was crying. I wasn’t sure when I started, but there were tears streaming down my face. She pressed on. “And somewhere along the way, in my quest to find my place in my unexpected new life, I forgot to inform you of my feelings, and to make choices that would reflect them.” She shook her head in annoyance as if marveling at her own idiocy. “Once the dust settled, it was so obvious to me that I’d taken a wrong turn, and how I’d screwed everything up and miscommunicated myself. I’m so sorry for that, Skyler. So I got the hell out of Seattle, which is probably the end of my newscasting career forever.”

I winced and she held up a hand.

“That doesn’t even matter to me as long as you know the deep-down truth, which is that if I lost you forever, I would be losingeverything. Do you know that?” Her brow was dropped, and she searched my face for any kind of clue.

I nodded and wiped the tears because I could actually feel the sincerity flowing off her in waves. I mattered that much to her. Me. “I can identify. When you walked out the door, I felt like my whole heart got up, left the room, and flew to Seattle.”

“Biggest mistake of my life and not one I’ll ever make again. Where you go, I go, if you ever give me that opportunity again.” She kissed the back of my hand. “Because nothing in life shines without you there.” She let go of my hand and took a step back. “And it’s not something you have to decide now or today or next week. We can take our time. We can—”

“I want an us. And I should have wanted us regardless of where you lived. I should have been stronger. I should have fought for what mattered. Not geography, but you. I was a jerk, and I’m so sorry for the way I acted. I clearly have a few insecurities to work on. But I want us. I do.”

She went still, mid-gesture. Silence. “Are you sure you know that?” She was clearly prepared to work to convince me, to put in hertime. For a moment, I imagined her wooing me with gestures. Courting me slowly, properly. But this was a two-way street, and that wouldn’t be fair. It’s also not what I needed. She was.

My tears welled again. “I miss you so much. And you came back. I didn’t expect that.”

“I had to. You were here.”

I grinned. “And let’s be honest. Micky was.”

She laughed. “Definitely part of the package. You’re lucky I wasn’t camped outside your apartment with a thermos of spiced rum and a poster board that saidLove me.”

I softened, took a moment. “Well, I do love you.”

She exhaled, and this time it was Carrie who lost the battle to tears. “Yeah? Because I love you so much and want to wake up every morning and look into your eyes and say it. I will spend my life trying to make you happy, Skyler. I never want you to doubt my feelings ever again.”

“Yes, please. Does that mean biscuits in a sexy robe?”

“At least every weekend. And I may be ahead of myself, but do you really need your apartment? I have tons of closet space and am willing to share.”

I paused because a family of four walking by was very interested in our conversation and heading our way.

“Big fans. Can we get a photo?”

I laughed and looked to Carrie, both of us a pile of emotion. “I feel like this might be a moment worth documenting.”

We stood together and smiled with the family. “I can’t believe we’re meeting both of you,” one of the moms said. “Our favorite newswomen.”

“Can you send me that photo?” I asked, realizing it had captured a true moment. I gave her my work email. I wanted to remember today.

The woman brightened. “Of course! Enjoy your night.”

---