Page 43 of Ripple Effect

“A pseudonym, yeah. I go by Everett Rain.” Her lips part slightly, breath noticeably hitching. “Daisy, are you . .. embarrassed that you’ve heard of it?”

She groans, pinching the bridge of her nose, her shoulders sagging. “No, I just, well—I think I may or may not be subscribed to you already.”

I stand there, trapped in the weight of the silence that settles between us, her words ricocheting around my skull.Daisy Grey. Subscribed. To me.As the shock takes hold, my brows involuntarily arch, and a crooked grin tugs at the corners of my mouth.

God, that’s such a Daisy thing, such an unexpected, amusing twist.

I take a moment, just watching her as she squirms under my gaze, cheeks burning as I lick my lips. “On purpose, are you?”

“No, no, Iswear.” She throws her hands up in surrender, a sudden panic flashing in her eyes. “I had no idea you were a creator when I made the account, when I subscribed to your profile. It was a complete accident. A coincidence. I would never invade your privacy like that.”

“My privacy? Daze, it’s a public account.”

“I know, but I mean, you’re my friend. And there are boundaries.” She diverts her gaze again, swallowing hard. Her throat works nervously as she forces the words out. “And God ... I swear that I’ve never watched any of your videos. I haven’t watched anyone’s yet, I promise.”

“Hey, hey, you’re good.” I raise my hand, hoping to calm her down. “Even if you had, I wouldn’t be mad at you for it.”

“You wouldn’t?”

“No, it’s okay. I’m not ashamed of what I put up there. I just ... I guess I’m surprised you found it. Surprised you’re on the site in the first place.”

“What, why?” she demands, hands resting firmly on her hips, gaze finally flickering back to me. “Because a girl like me can’t get her rocks off watching porn?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“It’s safe and perfectly ethical. Plus, I was just trying it out.”

“Please don’t feel like you need to defend yourself, especially not to me. I’m the one posting myself online fucking strangers, fuckingmyself.”

“Elio.”

“Daisy, seriously, stop. Neither of us has anything to be embarrassed about, okay? Sure, I like to keep that part of my life separate from the personal stuff, but it is what it is. I don’t go to great lengths to hide it, which means people I know are bound to find out.”

“I know, I’m not ... it’s not that I’membarrassed.And you definitely shouldn’t be, either. I just—I thought that AfterDark would be my thing. My chance to ... explore that side of myself a little bit more. And now, with you in the mix, it’s all kinds of messy.”

“What do you mean by explore? Like, you wanted to get into content creation yourself, or ...”

“No, not like that. I meant, I just mean, ugh—why is this so fucking hard?”

“You know, I just laid out some pretty vulnerable truths for you.”

“I know, and that’s why I’m trying to explain to you.” The words are a whisper, like a secret confession, disappearing in the air between us. A deep sigh leaves her lips, and she pushes a lock of hair behind her ear.

“I signed up for the site a few weeks ago, not too long after Logan cheated. He told me that I was too safe, too reserved in bed. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized that he had a point. I mean, I know there’s nothing wrong with having a low libido or having no interest in sex at all. But, for me, it just feels like something I never really put much thought into before. Like, with the act itself, with sexual attraction in general. I don’t know ... am I making any sense at all?”

“You’re making perfect sense.” The words are sincere, spoken with a softness I’ve come to reserve only for her. I understand her more than she realizes—her fears, her uncertainties, her quest for self-discovery.

“Really?”

“Yeah, I get it. I getyou. And you’re right, AfterDark is a good place for you to figure out your interests, your wants, your desires. Like you said, it’s safe. A lot of people, a lot of my subscribers, go there to discover themselves sexually.”

She swallows, her gaze thoughtful, her fingers playing absently with the rim of the small glass. “Okay, yeah. That makes me feel a little better.”

“But Daisy, you do know that Logan’s a fucking asshole, and he had no right to say that to you in the first place, right?”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Good.” The room seems to shrink, drawing us closer. “And also, it’s not as messy as you might think it is—this situation with us. If you ... I mean, if there’s anything you want to know about the site, about sex, uh, I can try my best to help you where I can.”

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