Page 49 of Queen of Ever

Either way, the fact that he couldn’t give me a concrete answer told me everything I needed to know.

‘I can’t accept that, Solas,’ I said instead.‘You can’t buy my forgiveness, it has to be earned.’A fact which wasn’t applicable to this situation, since I was sure that he wasn’t trying to buy my forgiveness at all.Whatever magic was on that necklace, it did something he didn’t want me to know about, otherwise he’d have told me what it did.

‘Is it that you think I’m trying to bribe you or that you’d feel guilty?’he asked, his voice turning hard as his mood soured.

‘What are you talking about?’

‘Do you think I don’t know that you snuck out with him last night?’Solas spat.

So much for secret.Anger surged, heating my skin, muddling with the sense of exposure I suddenly felt.He was calling me out on something private and mine and nothing to do with him, and the fact that I’d ever felt like I needed to conceal it from anyone suddenly felt insane.I got to my feet, closing some of the distance between us.‘That’s none of your business.’

‘While you’re under my care, it is.’

‘No, it isn’t,’ I snapped.‘We are on neutral ground, and we’ve broken none of your ridiculous rules.It’smychoice who I spend my time with.You may be the Seelie King, but that doesn’t give you the right to dictate my life.’

‘Careful, rabbit, lest you say something you regret.’

I held his gaze, even as it turned cold, even as it sent a chill down my spine.I would not let him scare me, despite the clear threat in his words.I didn’t know what he would do if I wouldn’t bend to his will, but the more he pushed, the more I knew that pushing back was dangerous.

But I was damn tired of tiptoeing around him.

Finally, he moved.He stuffed the necklace into his pocket.‘You’re acting very human today.Keep it up and you’ll start being treated like one.’With that final warning, he stalked away.

‘And you’re acting like an asshole,’ I muttered angrily under my breath.I wanted to show him that he couldn’t control me, that he had no power over me.Whatever shitty game he was trying to play with me, I was done playing it.

‘As much as I enjoy seeing you direct your rage at Solas, I’d rather you look at me,’ a familiar voice said.

I spun around.‘What are you doing here?’I asked, my voice dropping in volume despite the fact that we were alone.Though, it seemed ridiculous to worry about secrecy now.

I was tired of worrying about what other people would think or say or do anyway.The only reason we were keeping the secret was because of my own caution.‘Hang on a minute, how long have you been watching?’‘Why?Do you have something to hide?’

‘Only you,’ I said.‘Though you are making it difficult.’

He shrugged.‘It was your idea to keep this secret,’ he said, as if he’d read my mind.

‘I know.’I was always denying myself, my own wants and desires, and for what?Because I was too worried about the consequences.But damn the consequences.Damn the Seelie King and the Unseelie Queen and the courts and their damn rules.Why shouldn’t I have what I wanted?

And what I wanted right now was Tarian.

‘Come on,’ I said, taking his hand and leading him out of the courtyard.

‘Afraid to be seen with me?’he asked, but he didn’t resist.

‘Not exactly,’ I said.Maybe he read some of my mood, my intention, because he didn’t press me further, following me silently up a flight of stairs, down a corridor, passing by an open door where two Seelie ladies caught sight of us and I still didn’t relinquish his hand.I led him brazenly to the door of my room, and I didn’t even glance to see if anyone was watching as I opened that door and pulled him through it.

He watched me closely as I closed the door behind us, and suddenly I had doubts about what I was doing.I had never been bold like this, and maybe I still wasn’t.

‘Taking me into a private room alone, a man might get ideas,’ he said.But I knew he didn’t mean it, knew he would expect me to have another reason for bringing him here.Perhaps he’d mistake the blush in my cheeks for embarrassment over giving the wrong impression.

But it wasn’t wrong.

‘What kind of ideas?’I asked, my voice soft, portraying my nerves.There were so many reasons not to do this, not to give in to temptation, but the only reason that mattered now was the one for throwing caution to the wind.

I loved Tarian.I chose Tarian.

His eyes darkened, though he didn’t move, his expression didn’t change.The only hint I had to his emotions lay in the way he held my gaze, as if he wasn’t sure what he should do in this situation.I had been the one to put the restrictions on our relationship, to insist on the secrecy, and yet, here I was, breaking those rules.

‘Is this because of Solas?’

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