Page 65 of Edge of Control

But Theo had fixed the damage from that crash. His good morning texts, his sweet kisses, his smile and his jokes and his cool, effortless being and his ass and his dick and his lips and his heart. All of him. He created an antidote to the poison that my ex had forced down my throat. He’d given me back my confidence; he’d given me a reason totrust again.

The feather poked at my palm. Theo pushed in for a kiss. The feather fell from my hand.

“I’ve never felt like this before, either,” I admitted. Theo had me pinned against the wall. His body was a perfect fit against mine. He could have me locked in a cell with him, and I wouldn’t feel constrained. “It’s almost a little scary.”

“Nothing about this scares me. Everything about it cures me.”

“What if things are moving too fast?”

“By what standard? Who’s to say how fast any relationship should move? People have gotten married after days of knowing each other. People have broken off after hours of being together. There isn’t a rule book. There isn’t a guide to this.”

“I want this to work, Theo. So fucking bad. You make me feel like a god.”

“And all I want to do is worship at your altar.”

Theo’s eyes glittered. He was hard, and he wasn’t shy about it. Neither was I. I pressed against him.

“I was a complete mess before you got here, Jace. I couldn’t think straight. Could hardly catch my breath. My heart felt like it was ten beats away from exploding. But the second you got here, from the moment I got to hold you, that all stopped.” He leaned in and kissed my neck. I tilted my head back. Sighed. This was everything I needed.Hewas everything I needed. Everything I thought I had lost.

And it made me feel good to know I was helping him. I wanted to stop Theo from ever feeling any pain, any worries, any stress. Wasn’t that what being in a relationship wasall about? Making your other half’s life easier, and they’d do the same in return?

A moan escaped my lips as he sucked on my neck, his body beginning to grind against mine. The warning bells were nonexistent. Once again, Theo managed to pull my mind away from any caution or worries or suspicions. And he did it effortlessly, too. I hardly realized it. Could only focus on how good being with him felt.

“What if you’re lying to me?” I said, eyes shut as his tongue licked against my tender skin.

“About what?”

“About everything. I’ve been fooled before. My ex made me believe he loved me. But he didn’t. He made me think he was my biggest supporter, but he wasn’t.”

“I’m not lying to you. Not when I say that I want you with every fiber of my being. I’m not lying when I say I need you by my side. I’m not lying when I tell you that I’m falling in love with you, Jace.”

That made me pause. That caused my heart to leap up to my throat. Love.

Love.

Love?

Was that what I was feeling?

Love.

“I’m sorry,” he said, eyes turned down to the floor. “I just had to say it. It’s too powerful of an emotion for me to hold back.”

I wasn’t sure if I could say it back. I definitely liked Theo. I liked hima lot. But love took me longer to develop.

And yet, what else could explain why Theo was thefirst person I thought of when I woke and the last person I thought of as I drifted to sleep? He had consumed my thoughts. Day through night. He’d become my obsession.

“Don’t apologize. I’ve just been hurt before.”

“And that kills me. I don’t want you to hurt again. And if anyone does inflict any kind of pain on you, they’ll have to answer to me.” A possessive kind of anger flared in Theo’s eyes. My cock throbbed against his. My shirt, my pants, my underwear, it all felt too tight. Like I had to shed it all. I wanted to be naked with him, to feel my skin against his.

But that feather.

The thought hit me like a lightning bolt. He had already explained how it ended up in his apartment. It made sense. And yet…

Theo kissed me again. My hands landed on his hips. I could push him away. I could end this here and now. It would be giving in to the doubts I tried so hard to silence. Doubts about myself, my life, my judgment. I could make a choice to cut things off and go back to my sad, boring, pathetic life. Empty. No thrills, no passion. Just the same old boring routine, with no end in sight. The thought alone was already pulling in the curtains of depression, making me imagine a life spent lying in bed, full of what-ifs and whys and should-I’s. I could choose that life, or I could go in the other direction.

There was a clear crossroad set in front of me, and I had no map to guide me.