Page 38 of Aftermath

In one dream, his fingers brushed over Cam's tattoos. In another, he was on the floor in that cell, and he was fucking Cam brutally, which had certainly never happened in reality. Then the dreams morphed into group sessions with Gale where they all tried to make sense of their kidnapper's motives. Even with a profiler from the FBI on the case, they still only had an educated guess as to why that madman had kidnapped them.

Before long, the dream became a nightmare once more. The torture always came back.

Torture and death.

Chris had been silent in his cell for two days before the other guys found out he had killed himself the same way James had—by slitting his wrists and swallowing the blades.

One cell was now empty. Chris and Pete both gone. Lance had been alone in his cell after James's death.

Their captor whistled a happy tune as he dragged Chris's body out of the basement, and before he disappeared, he told the others he had a performance review meeting planned with "Scott" later.

Scott's real name was Sean, and he shared a cell with Tim right next to Cam and Austin.

They all knew the outcome.

Not a thing to be done about that.

To be sure, though, Austin did search their cell for the umpteenth time, and this time Cam actually helped. Was there really no way out? Was it possible for a single man to keep ten others hostage? Now seven…

"Do you think we're still in Bakersfield?" Cam asked quietly, checking the bolts by the toilet. He tried to wiggle the toilet, but the solid chrome didn’t budge a millimeter.

"No idea, but I have a better question for you." Austin was on his back on the floor, looking under his cot. "Do you think people are still searching for us?"

"Dude, they fucking better be."

Names and blurry faces danced in the edges of Austin's vision; the nightmares held him hostage much like the madman had. Cam, Evan, Austin, Sam, Chase, Remy, Sean, Scott…there were too many names, and only half of them belonged to the guys in captivity.

The other names…well, they'd gotten their answers about that.

But why didn’t the insane fucker torture the real Sam? Why didn’t he beat the real Evan senseless instead of Cam? Why pretend with ten innocent men?

Hours later, a nearly unconscious Sean was returned to his cell.

What hit Austin the hardest was how Sean cried out for his children while Tim tended to his wounds.

Sitting down on the floor, Austin pulled up his knees and dropped his forehead to them. He wanted Sean to stop—to shut up and suffer silently. Because all he did now was make Austin want to cry for his own daughter.

While Austin missed his wife, too, it was different when it came to his child. It wasn’t until Riley was born that Austin understood his mother's words about the bond between a child and a parent being unbreakable. Friends could leave, wives and husbands could divorce, passion could fade, but the love you felt for your child was forever.

Maggie rarely spoke about the youngest son she lost to leukemia when Austin was ten years old, but that didn’t mean he was forgotten. She religiously visited Riley's grave, the photos were never coming off the walls, and she loved him as if he were still alive.

The day Austin's daughter was born and he announced he was naming her after his younger brother, Maggie had been proud, not sad.

"You can't lose hope, man," Cam said, sitting down next to him. "Keep hoping you'll see her soon."

Austin was thankful Cam didn’t make any promises. He wasn’t sure he was strong enough to listen to vows neither man could keep.

"I think I've missed her birthday," he mumbled, discreetly tilting his head to wipe away tears on his shoulder.

"When is it?"

"May fifth."

There was a smile in Cam's voice when he spoke next. "A Mexican celebration kid, huh?" He cautiously placed his arm around Austin's shoulders.

"Yeah." Austin sniffled and managed to pull off a small smile, but he kept his eyes downcast. "She loves Mexican food, too. And we wouldn’t hear the end of it if her birthday didn’t come with a piñata."

In fact, it was only recently Riley found outCinco de Mayowasn’t all about her. That had been a glum day, but it had brightened when Austin took her out for chips and salsa and queso. The girl was crazy about her queso.

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