Page 23 of Bodybuilders for the BBW

“This place up the road from work,” I told him, half expecting him to tear that idea to pieces. Garrett had opinions, lots of them, when it came to food, clothing, drinks. Most weekends we were forced to go to some bougie market to buy artisan cheese or whatever, whereas Rhys and I would happily live on protein shakes, steak, and eggs. “They say they’re a modern Italian place.”

“So completely inauthentic,” Garrett tutted, but he was moving towards my wardrobe and pulling out items in rapid succession. “Nope, washes you out.” He dismissed a reddish brown shirt. “Grey does not work for you and I’ve told you that multiple times, even though you keep buying shirts that colour, but this…” He held out a dark blue shirt and held it near my face before shoving it into my chest. “That and some black slacks. Shoes, not boots.” He pointed a finger at my face, making clear what would happen if I dared disobey him. “And give them a polish.” My best friend stepped back, pursing his lips as he stared me in the eyes. “You really like this girl, don’t you?”

I hadn’t spoken much about Katie to him or Rhys. What the hell could I say? That the minute she walked into the fire station break room I was on my feet and taking a step towards her, like it was my arm that was meant to go around her waist, not Dave’s. Every damn firefighter there noticed my reaction, including that prick. He’d shot me a snide smile as he introduced her to everyone.

When she smiled at me, my heart beat way too hard, way too fast, and why the hell was that? She was gorgeous, but that wasn’t the reason. I felt… something, a rapid tumble of emotion I’d given up thinking I’d feel again, and that’s what had me hanging around another man’s girl like a bad smell. There were pretty girls, and hot girls, and even beautiful ones, but they didn’t get a reaction from me, not like she did. That, that feeling of connection, something I’d given up hope feeling was what had me stressing over my fit like a teenage girl.

“I don’t know,” I said in answer, but that didn’t feel right. “Not much opportunity to chat up a girl when she was going out with a colleague. I guess we’ll find out if there’s anything there tonight.”

“But you want there to be.” Garrett stared into my eyes, making clear he wouldn’t let me fob him off. “You want to see if something serious can come of this.”

“That’s all that any of us wanted, right?” I snorted and shook my head. “I know fuckboys are a thing now, but that’s not me. Just feels like masturbating in a hole, taking some strange woman home to fuck. Not good for her, not good for me either.”

“Funny way to say you’re shit in bed.”

I found myself smiling despite myself.

“Nothing’s changed for me,” I said, standing taller. I grabbed the shirt he’d chosen and some black pants, then inspected my shoes closely. A rub at the toes with my sleeve and they were looking alright. “We said we wanted…” I stopped myself from going any further. We didn’t talk about the break up, not ever, and I wouldn’t start now. I didn’t need the spectre of our failures haunting us now. “I still want someone to come home to, someone to look after, to care for.” My breath escaped in a shuddering sigh. “Not just a roll in the hay. I want to wake up beside her, watch her sleep.”

“Because that’s not creepy,” Garrett muttered.

“And be there when she wakes up.” That was what had me pining after Katie. I was too much in my own head, creating scenarios that would never happen, but… When I listed all the things I wanted, I saw her every time. When I looked at Garrett, I shrugged. “I could be overthinking this.”

“No…”

The prick, he could take a sip of coffee and still make it sarcastic.

“Maybe there’s no connection there, but I need to know. You only get one go at life, and I’m not wasting it on might’ve beens.”

“OK.” He pulled a belt out of my wardrobe and a pair of socks and then handed it to me. “You’re taking her somewhere nice. That’s good, shows you’re serious.” He looked over his shoulder at me. “You’re paying, right?”

“Of course I’m bloody paying.”

“Open her door for her. Pull out her chair. Ask her questions about her day. Don’t bore her with stories about yours.” Garrett was like some kind of dating coach right now, ticking off each item. “Make everything about her.” He came to a stop in front of me, and suddenly I felt like I was lined up in formation, ready to hear the station chief’s speech. “If you give yourself a chance to get to know who she is as a person, then you can see if there’s anything real there, but afterwards, I need you and Rhys to help me get this place tidied up. The dog shelter staff are coming to inspect the place, see if we’re a good fit for the dog.”

Still wasn’t sure what the hell he’d do with a dog. Garrett was a cat person if ever I’d met one, strangely contained, but hey, the story he’d told me about the dog’s background? I was in, 100%.

“Done.”

I collected up everything he’d handpicked and threw it in a duffel bag, which just had him rolling his eyes. I think he said something about creases or some shit. I didn’t think about that as I walked out the door, nor when I entered the station.

“Rhett,”Gareth said as soon as I walked in the door.

“I’ve got a long day of paperwork ahead of me?” I asked, hopeful I wouldn’t turn up to my date with the stink of smoke still hanging around me.

“You’re heading over to the primary school.” He thrust a handful of paper at me. “One of the fellas is out sick, so I’ll need you…”

To try and wrangle a bunch of hyperactive little kids, apparently. We tried to convey some fire safety information to the preschoolers, but their little brains weren’t able to focus, not with the massive fire truck there. I looked at my partner and we both nodded and then set the kids loose on the truck. They were like a pack of screaming monkeys, climbing like ones as they clambered over the vehicle. We were hoisting some kids up into the back seat, stopping yet others from trying to climb onto the ladders. They each got a turn at tooting the horn, the delight on their faces making the day worth it, even if I had to scramble when we got back to the station at the end of the day. Back into the showers, I cleaned myself up, then carefully changed into my date outfit, taking care to comb my hair just right.

“Well, well, look at you,” one of the guys said as I made for the door. “Looking sharp there, Windy.”

Mum had named me for Rhett Butler, the character in Gone with the Wind, which then devolved into a convoluted series of nicknames before everyone settled on Windy.

“What’s going on?” Charlie asked, stumbling out into the hall and then looking me up and down. “Funeral? Dinner with the parents?” He stabbed a finger in the air. “I know?—”

Knox stepped out, interrupting his team mate.

“You’re going on that date.” Those grey eyes seemed to see straight through me. “With Katie, if I’m not mistaken.”

---