Page 47 of Her Wolf of a Duke

“It is partly that,” he confessed. “I have never met a lady so determined not to like me as you are, but it is more than that.”

“In any case, I cannot be seen with you. I cannot be another notch on your belt, no matter how much you might like me to be.”

“If it is any consolation, that was never my intention.”

“Then what was it?”

“Conversation and friendship, if you dare to believe that. You are interesting, and I like the sort of person you are. I admire how hard you have tried to make your sister happy, and the lengths to which you would go to please your father. You are a pleasure to be around, when you are not accusing me of the most outlandish things. That is why I enjoy being around you, and there is nothing to do with my belt there.”

Silence fell between them, and he looked into her eyes as she thought about what he had said to her.

With the way she had looked up at him, he could have inferred many things about her wants, but he would never act upon them unless she explicitly asked, and he knew she was too proud to do that.

“There was never anything between Miss Winston and me,” he repeated, and she came to a stop.

“Please stop,” she said softly, looking into his eyes.

“Or what?” he asked, “Until you believe me, I shall tell you over and over. Should you want me to stop, you should simply listen to me.”

“It is nothing to do with her,” she explained. “I simply cannot stand to hear you say the right things over and over, m-making me feel things that I do not want to feel, and tearing down my defenses. They have been there for far too long for you to destroy them.”

She came close to him, in spite of her words. Levi wondered just how many drinks Miss Penton had given her in the ballroom.

“Perhaps,” he said softly, his hands hovering mere inches above her shoulder in case he had to push her back for her own sake, “it is time for these defenses of yours to come down. You should trust yourself to make the right decisions without holding people at arm’s length.”

“You only say that because you want me closer.”

“Then come closer.”

“I cannot.”

“Then step away. I am not forcing you to be this close to me, after all.”

She seemed to realize where she was at that point, no longer being held in place at the banister but free to move, to leave if she wished.

At that, her shoulders slumped. She had lost all of the fight that had been in her, her anger dissipated, and for the first time since he met Miss Kendall he did not know what she would do. He half expected her to walk away from him and return to the safety of the ball, or to make another cutting comment about how he was a good for nothing rake that she could never care for. He did not want either to happen, but it was what he had expected.

What he did not think would ever happen, however, was that she would grab his collar with both hands, pulling him down towards her and closing the distance between them altogether.

Her soft lips pressed into his, and he lost all of his own defenses. It was wrong, he told himself, and she couldn’t think properly and would only ever regret it, but he couldn’t make himself believe it. There was so much desperation in it, so much desire, that he had to give her exactly what he had thought about since the first moment she admonished him.

They pulled apart, breathless, and her face registered only shock.

“My apologies, Your Grace,” she said quickly. “I did not mean– Oh, God.”

“It is alright, Miss Kendall. What is it?”

“I simply– I have been so good all of my life. I have spent years trying to be the perfect lady, hoping that it might one day mean something, but it doesn’t. I am unmarried and unwanted, and my sister that has done much the same thing, will never know love either. If this is what doing what is expected of us leads us to, then I no longer want any of it. I want to do the wrong thing, just for one evening.”

She said it so quickly that it took Levi a moment to understand. He took her shoulders to steady her, as she had begun stumbling again. She looked up at him again with a desperation in her eyes, and he could no longer do the gentlemanly thing.

The truth was, he wanted to do the wrong thing every bit as much as she did.

And so, he pulled her close again, holding her tightly to him as he kissed her in return, with a passion he did not think he had in him. He had kissed before, but it hadn’t been anything like this. He had never felt anything like it, something so intense, so wonderful, until her. She was unlike any other lady he had ever known, and that was precisely what made her so important to him, and what made him so desperate to please her.

Given the way she was holding onto him, he could only believe that he was doing so.

But they knew the risks, and of course the danger presented itself. Suddenly, there was a gasp nearby. Miss Kendall’s touch disappeared from his neck, and he opened his eyes to see she had darted several feet away from him, trembling and terrified.

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