Page 104 of The Duchess' Replacement

“About what?” Sarah furrowed her brows.

“Charles.”

Sarah’s heart thumped at the sound of his name. Not more than a moment ago she had hoped he was standing here, but now, at the mention of his name, she was frozen. What had he come to tell her? Did Charles make amends with Eli and then asked him to break the news that Charles no longer wanted her?

Sarah pinched the bridge of her nose. She has to stop reading such dramatic novels, they are causing her imagination to run wild. Charles can barely look at Eli let alone send him on personal missions.

“What about Charles?” She asked timidly. She doubted Eli had seen Charles since they parted but, with Eli, she could never be sure of what his true intentions were.

Eli blew out a breath and pointed to the window. “Would you care for a walk? I find conversations flow better when one walks.”

Sarah looked outside to the sunny summer day. She sighed. “Very well.”

They walked outside and Sarah led Eli down the path to the small flower garden Eleanor had planted outside of her home.

Eli kept his hands behind his back while they walked side by side along the path.

“This is a beautiful piece of property. It looks like your sister and-”

“Why are you here, Eli?” She interrupted his mindless chatter.

Eli smiled. “I definitely misjudged you when we first met. For that I apologize.”

Sarah squinted against the afternoon sun. “You already apologized for your part in our past and I have accepted. Why are you really here?”

“You’re right. I have apologized for misjudging you, but Charles has not. Which is why I’m here.”

Sarah stopped to look at Eli. “Are you here to apologize for him?”

Eli guffawed. “Heavens, no. The old sport can do that himself. However,” he adjusted his cravat, “I am here to shine some more light on my family dynamics.”

“This is all good and well, Eli, but I feel even if I were able to relive your family’s past with you, your brother would still not approve of my knowing about it.”

The broken pieces of her heart rattled within her chest. It hurt knowing that Charles didn’t allow her in or that he didn’t give her a chance to understand.

Eli’s laugh was a bit more subdued this time. “You’re not wrong. He’s very protective of our family. And I have made us an easy target these past few years.”

Sarah grimaced. “I agree.”

They continued to walk, making their way to a bench that sat next to a fountain.

“Our father’s death changed Charles.” Eli said as he motioned to Sarah to sit on the bench. He continued to pace in front of her.

Sarah bit her cheek from smiling. It seems pacing is another common trait amongst the siblings.

“Not only was he a newly appointed Duke, our mother did not handle his death well. She was distant and despondent. Then one day she wakes us up to tell us that she will be having another child. We would’ve been shocked but life returned in our mother’s eyes. She was happy and had purpose again. Charles and I didn’t push for details to risk losing that.”

Eli stopped and looked down at his boots. “That’s when life became really difficult. Rumors started circulating in the town and mother’s trips to help those in need were rejected. It shattered her. It was like losing our father all over again. The taunts and ridicule she received was abhorrent.”

He rubbed the back of his neck as he brought his eyes to look up to the sky. Sarah sat still on the bench, wanting to know more, but at the same time wanting to hug the young Eli who had to go through this. And, yet, even through his retelling, Sarah couldn’t help but wish this was all coming from Charles.

“It affected Charles and I differently. I figured if people were going to make up rumors the pressure to be the perfect in the eyes of the peerage was pointless. So I went and had my fun, not realizing I was making it more difficult for Charles.”

Sad, green eyes met hers. “Where I was soft and having fun, Charles was hardening himself against the world in order to protect what he could. Our livelihood is that duchy and if anything happened to it we would be done for. Everyone was waiting for him to make a mistake.”

A small sigh escaped his lips as he dropped his eyes to the ground. “I guess they still are.”

Sarah fought to swallow over the lump that formed in her throat. She bit her bottom lip to stop it from quivering. Her hands clenched into fists to stop her from reaching out to him, to stop from lashing out against the world for being so cruel.

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