A low knock sounded from her door.
“Your Grace? It’s Lizzie. I have your food.”
Sarah let Lizzie in, who placed the tray on a side table by the door.
“Would you like me to help you get ready for bed tonight, Your Grace?”
Sarah nodded her head. “No, thank you, Lizzie. I always make sure my traveling clothes are manageable.”
Lizzie dropped her eyes.
“If I need help I will send for you, though. Thank you, Lizzie,” Sarah said, gesturing to the food. “I appreciate your help. It’s just been a whirlwind of a few days and I’m still trying to catch my breath.”
Lizzie offered a small smile. “We are very happy to have you here, Your Grace. I hope you’ll like it here.”
Sarah glanced over Lizzie’s shoulder and out in the hallway where she could have sworn she saw a lurking shadow.
“I hope so, too, Lizzie.”
Lizzie tilted her head before closing the door behind her.
Dinner smelled delicious but Sarah’s stomach wouldn’t even let her consider eating a single bite. Her stomach had been spinning all day. Her head and heart ached from the emotional upheaval she’s been through.
She didn’t expect Charles to be charming or even that romantic, but she relied so heavily on her mother’s theory that love can blossom out of the most unlikely places. Unfortunately for Sarah, in order for any relationship to blossom with her husband they would have to be in each other’s company. Outside of the carriage ride, she’s seen her husband a grand total of once and that was at the inn.
And even then it was only to give rules about what she was allowed to talk about and her responsibilities as Duchess.
It was also when he gave her ten days to wrap her mind around consummating the marriage in the hopes of producing an heir. A shiver ran down her spine at the memory of his words.
“And when I do take someone, I’m not gentle. You’ve been warned, Sarah.”
Sarah picked up her night shift and sat on the edge of the bed. Her hand cramped around the material from how hard she was clutching the shift.
Charles did not seem like a man that would be gentle.
Sarah heard a creak from a floorboard outside her room. Her heart rate picked up and she looked at the door.
Was he standing outside her door?
Sarah shook her head. She was becoming paranoid. Not having answers was playing tricks on her mind. It was most likely a maid or Samuels.
Still, she walked over to the door and locked it. She backed up until the back of her knees hit the bed and she sat, still staring at the door.
Sarah felt in way over her head. Nothing in any of her romance books prepared her for marrying a brute. Her books were all filled with undying love proclamations and grand scale gestures. There were soft touches, and seductive whispers in corners. Sarah’s focused on the space between the floorboards and the bottom of the door. She watched as a shadowed moved slowly from one side of the door to the other, footsteps moving farther away.
Sarah’s heart sunk further in her chest. She doubted she would get soft touches and words of affirmation or love from Charles. A love story like that doesn’t come with the paramour giving his love a deadline for consummation.
Sarah didn’t wipe the tears that began to fall. She let them. For tonight she was going to grieve the life she thought she’d live. She needed to come to terms with letting go of a life full of romance and love, one that she gave her happiness and security.
She laid down on top of the covers, still clutching her night shirt, and curled into a ball. Her body rocked back and forth as the tears fell and coated the duvet. She fell asleep thinking of what might have been and what she could not have.
CHAPTER 6
Sarah walked into the dining room the next afternoon. She spent all day with Mrs. Bates going over schedules and meeting more of the household staff. She was exhausted but she was feeling more confident in her role of Duchess.
The one thing she was not feeling better about was Charles. She had not seen him all day. His noticeable absence was grating on her nerves. Not only was it incredibly rude but she couldn’t help but notice the staff take notice of his avoidance of his new wife.
Samuels held out the chair for Sarah to sit in.