Page 24 of Between Us

There’s a soft expression I’ve never seen on her before. “That’s beautiful, Adrian. And it makes sense.” She offers me a small smile that morphs into a grimace. “No I mean, what prompted it isn’t beautiful, but you know… the outcome?”

It ends on a question like she isn’t sure what she meant anymore. I can’t help but laugh. Blake’s inability to shut up is quickly becoming one of my favorite things.

“Nah, I knew what you meant. I underestimated how taxing the job would be though, and I’m not even technically workingthe jobyet either.”

She doesn’t say anything for a long moment. I start to wonder if this is too deep of a conversation for her, grasping for another deflection, when she says quietly, “I overheard my dad once. He was saying that they teach you about the less desirable aspects of the job, but there’s no way toknowhow it’ll affect you until you’re there, doing it… I wish I had more advice to offer you, but talking to someone, like my dad or a therapist might help. Especially if you’re feeling that way.”

My brows furrow in surprise. Blake’s openness to seeking mental health doesn’t necessarily match her closed off personality. At the same time, I’ve seen the way she’s emotionally receptive to patients and clients. So, it makes me believe Blake’s advice is coming from a place that not only respects the benefits of therapy but understands it.

“I’ve never really considered that,” I admit. It’s not that I have negative feelings toward it or that I think I’m above it. I just don’t have any deep seeded traumas. “Truthfully, I never thought it could be a preventative sort of thing, I guess.”

Looking at me through her lashes, she quietly says, “You’d be surprised by the emotional tools someone could provide you, and it would only help you in the long run.” She gives me a smug, knowing look as she takes a huge bite of her waffles.

The tug of my lips that never loosens when she’s around pulls even wider. Nodding slowly and watching her, I realize Blake’s right. Being proactive about my future is what has gotten me into one of the best DVM programs in the country, as well as the job at Amada Beach Animal Clinic. There’s no reason that shouldn’t include my mental health as well.

I like that Blake feels comfortable enough to push me to be better, and I plan on listening to her about this.

Chapter Twelve

Blake

Shovingeverythingintomybag, I don’t stop to wrap my yarn better. It just gets thrown haphazardly into the tote like everything else.

Well, with the exception of the mango and chili lollipop I found waiting for me on the desk this morning—and a sticky note with a smiley face on it. That’s safely in my hand because it’s pretty much the only thing that’s gotten me through the day.

I don’t even know what’s wrong. It’s just one of those days. From the moment I woke up, it felt like my own brain was assaulting me with insecurities and ‘what if’ scenarios.

Like,what if Margo decides her new fashion school friends are way cooler than I am, and she moves on from my friendship? What if Meera makes it so big in the classical music world that I never see her again? What if she doesn’t make it at all because of my selfish thoughts?

And so on… and on… and on…

If my dad wasn’t my boss, I would’ve called into work today. But I didn’t want to talk to him, or my mom, about how I’m feeling.

Sometimes it’s hard to talk to them. Especially when nothing is reallywrong, I just feel… desolate. It could be because I miss my friends, or that my brother never answers his goddamn phone anymore. Honestly, there’s always been this part of myself that feels lonely even when I’m surrounded by the people I love, and who I know love me. It didn’t take my high school bullies to create that crater in my heart. It’s been there for as long as I can remember.

Even if it’s counterintuitive, all I want is to crawl into my bed and be alone for a few hours.

Practically jogging to my car, wanting to avoid having to talk to anyone else, I don’t notice the two completely flat tires until I’m about to step in.

“Why?Why, why, why?” I ask no one while I drop my head on the roof of my car.

I mean, could the day get any worse?

The day started off bad due to my own brain, but it only went downhill from there. I was stuck on a forty-five-minute call with Polly as she lectured me about the prescriptionmy dadwrote for her cat, and something I have absolutely no say in. After that, Lela came in with her husband andChispafor a pre-op appointment. She started crying when she told me that the operation is scheduled for five days from now. Then the system crashed, and we lost almost all of the appointments scheduled today. And it was just one thing after another.

So, even though it may seem like an easy answer, I pull out my phone, thinking about my options…

Tears build in my eyes, but I bite my lip, fighting them off as much as I can.

I will not cry until I’m in the comfort of my own bed, I mentally repeat for the hundredth time today.

I could call either of my parents,of course, and they’d be here in ten minutes, but they were really excited about cooking tonight. My dad got a new Blackstone, and he’s been thinking about fajitas all week. It’s kind of adorable when he gets in these moods. Plus, I need all the time I can get to pull myself together before I have to face them. They’ll know I had a shitty day before even seeing my face.

The towing company is only about five minutes away, and Mr. Bennett wouldn’t charge me full price, though still more than I’m willing to pay right now.

I’m about to sayfuck itand call for a tow when I hear Adrian and one of today’s mid-shift veterinarians walking out. I turn around to find them both looking at me with concern. Adrian turns to say something to her but motions in my direction, then he’s walking to me while she reluctantly goes to her car. I cross my arms and wait, not having any other choice.

“That sucks,” he observes.

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