Page 51 of Uprising

It’s not until my breath gives out, leaving me gasping, that the silence plunges between us once more. I felt the dampness on my cheek before I realized I was crying. I told myself I would never let him see me break, but here I stand. Broken and begging him to trust me with the truth.

Just when I don’t think he’s going to answer me, Reed rounds the corner. Grabbing my chin, he tips my head up.

“It was my fault. You were shot, and it was my fault.”

My brow furrows, confused as I search my brain for the memories. Suddenly everything flashes before my eyes. I was leaving; I couldn’t stand the thought of Reed being the one to walk away from me. He was asleep and?—

“Goodbye,” I whisper.

The burst of gunfire sounds; my vision blurs for a second before I feel the searing heat of the explosion in my shoulder. In slow motion I watch Reed jump up, his eyes searching for what happened.

“NOAH!”

My mouth opens to say something as my knees weaken, my shoulder burns, and my world fades to black.

“I—I was shot...” my voice trails off.

“Yes, my love, and it was my fault.”

None of his words make sense. My mind feels sluggish trying to remember what happened after, but I don’t.

“I don’t understand. How was it your fault? You didn’t shoot me.”

I stare at him, searching for an explanation of how he can think that me getting hurt was his fault. But all I find is guilt.

“I would never,” he whispers.

“Then, I’m confused. How was it your fault?”

A strange, twisting feeling wrapped around my stomach. I tried to push past the fog in my head, but the memories wouldn’t come. After I passed out, there's nothing, not until I woke up in bed.

He glances away, trying to hide himself from me. I swallow around the pain, wrapping my arms around his waist so he can’t move from me.

“You have to speak to me; I can’t read your mind.” I try to convince him. Fear licks up my spine, afraid that he’ll push me away further, that he’ll break what little thing we have going on.

“It’s better if you can’t read my mind,” Reed mumbles, turning his head back towards me.

“I’m not letting go until you tell me, so you better get used to wearing me like a second skin. Or I’m going to keep nagging every second of every minute of every hour of every day. I’m stubborn, so pick your poison. Not being able to get rid of me or tell me why you’re blaming yourself?”

Reed’s jaw clenches, his hand dropping from my face. The space between us stretches wide, fragile and threatening to snap under the weight of him not being honest with me.

I tighten my grip around his waist, earning a growl from Reed. I smile and decide to test the waters. Leaning forward, I rest my chin against his chest.

“I can wait here all day,” I remind him.

Reed sighs, his head dropping back.

“We were thirty minutes from the cabin. From here. We were right here, and if I would have just pushed us further, you wouldn’t have been shot.” He finally lets the truth out. Only I’m confused, as I have never been good at reading between the lines.

“I’m not understanding.”

“Noah, we were this close,” he puts his fingertip and thumb close enough together that you can barely see between them. “I shouldn’t have let you stop. I should have told you we were close to the cabin.”

“If you want to blame someone, you can blame me.”

Reed’s head snaps down to look at me.

Taking a deep breath, I confess, “I was going to leave.”