Page 95 of Ruined

“They wouldn’t leave your side.” A nurse steps into the room. My body freezes for a moment before I take a calming breath. “I’m just here to take some vitals, and afterward, you can shower if you want.” She smiles.

Nodding my head, I glance down at the hospital gown I’m wearing. My skin feels clammy and sticky. A shower would be nice.

Scooting down the bed, the nurse helps me stand, tossing the blanket in the middle of Jace and Ryker. Smiling at them cuddling, she takes my vitals before helping me into the bathroom.

“I’m Jennifer, by the way. If you need any help, just hit the emergency button.” She points to the remote in the shower. Backing away, she starts to close the door. Grabbing her arm, my nails bite into her arm. I shake my head, tilting my head towards the door.

“The door?”

I nod my head.

“You want me to leave it open?” she asks frowning.

Again, I nod my head.

“Okay, dear, I can do that.” Jennifer smiles sadly at me. I wait until the hospital room door shuts before I drop the hospital gown. My eyes drop from the mirror, unable to look at myself. If I do, I know I will break, and I can’t chance the guys finding me like that.

Taking a deep breath, I flip the shower on. Stepping inside, I lean against the cold wall. I hiss when the freezing water hits me. My eyes close, and flashes of Jace sitting in the chair with a knife lodged into his neck hit me.

What if I hadn’t been able to break the zip ties? What if she had killed me before I was able to save him? Instead of me being tortured, it’s Jace. He’s the one being stabbed and cut.

I shake my head, trying to get rid of the thoughts. He can’t die. He can’t leave me.

My breath comes in ragged, my knees buckling. I’m not strong enough to hold myself any longer. My legs crumble beneath me. My ass hits the groundwith a thud, and I’m sure I woke them up. Tears spring from my eyes, pouring down my cheeks. I can’t breathe.I can’t breathe.

My fingers grip my throat, and my nails dig into my skin. Clawing at my neck.

Arms wrap around me, my ribs screaming at me when I flinch, jerking away.

“Shh, it’s me, Sunshine,” Jace murmurs into my ear. My body immediately relaxes, my head falling back against his shoulder.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. Fuck. Blake, I’m sorry.” His voice shakes as he speaks. I shift around, my legs wrapping around his waist as he holds my back. “I never should have taken you there. I’m sorry. I never meant for you to get hurt. I never should have fallen for it, Blake. I’m so fucking sorr—” He sobs, dropping his head to my chest. My fingers brush through his hair as he cries. Tipping my head up, the water sprays over my face. Before I would have panicked if the water hit my face. I would have cried and stabbed anything touching me.

But now, with Jace’s arm around me, holding me as if his life depends on it, I smile, letting the water hit my face, and calmness rushes over me.

“Jace,” I mumble, my voice raspy and scratchy. “I love you[SK1] .”

Jace freezes, his sobs melting away. I cup his cheeks, picking his head up. His eyes blink rapidly, not believing I talked. It’s hard to believe myself; it wasn’t something I planned. I just had this overwhelming need to tell Jace that I love him.

I swipe his cheeks, not sure if it’s from him crying or the water from the shower.

“I’m so—”

“I love you,” I croak, pressing my forehead against him. His body shivers against mine, his cock hardening in his pants.

“I never thought I would hear your voice,” he says, his voice pained.

I shake my head. The moment Jace let me stab him and locked me in the gas station bathroom, I knew he was going to tear down my walls. I knew he was going to be the one who broke into my brain and demanded to hear my voice.

“I love you,” he whispers crushing his lips to mine. I smile against his mouth, a laugh bubbling inside my throat and for the first time, I let myself feel safeenough to let go. Jace smiles, his hands sliding up my sides and to the back of my head. Gripping my hair, he pulls me back.

“I’m so in love with you. I’ve loved you since you threw that knife at my face. You weren’t scared of me. You didn’t take my shit. I dreamed of hearing you speak, that you would feel comfortable enough to trust me. That you would know the moment you let that last wall down, you would know I’ll always run to you. It’s only you, Blake.” Jace pours his heart out, never once looking away. He wanted me to know and understand everything he was confessing.

There was no doubt in my mind. I might have only met them weeks ago, but no one besides Ryker and Jace was going to make me feel safe enough. Because I knew no matter what, if I screamed for them, they would be there to save me.

36

There are days when I wish I had died in the fire that took Laia and Grams. Things would have been much easier; I wouldn’t have murdered countless people, even if they deserved it. But at the same time, Luna wouldn’t have survived her ex, and she would never have become obsessed with Jace. Then, she never would have hurt Blake.

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