Page 33 of Instinct & New Identity

He hadn’t mentioned a girlfriend, butIalso never asked.Afew nights ago, he said he was going to be late coming home.NowIwondered if it was because he was spending time with her, and nowIfound myself suddenly having the urge to punch her in the face.

I knewIdidn’t have any claim onVincewhatsoever, but knowing that this woman did made me oddly jealous, andIdidn’t like it.Idecided to just leave the building and go make the meal becauseIdidn’t want to be around if she started touching him or kissing him.

“Bye,Ruthie.Seeyou tomorrow,”Isaid asIwalked by the desk, interrupting their discussion.

“Bye,Cat!” she said back to me and went back to her conversation with skinny businessBarbieasIwalked out the door.

I spent the next hour prepping and cooking thepastelón.Itrequired a lot of prep work, butIhad been making it for so longIcould normally make it with my eyes closed.Today, though,Icouldn’t seem to concentrate.MaybeIwas about to start my period, or maybeIwas just tired.Iknew deep down neither of those were the reason.No, the real reason for my frustrated state was skinny and blonde and had waltzed right into the office and shattered any hopeIhad ofVincelooking at me any differently than just a friend.Icouldn’t believeIever thought the look on his face was that he might want to kiss me.Ugh.Ididn’t have much experience with dating and men in general, and it was showing.

It was moments like theseIwishedIhad girlfriends.WomenIcould ask about these things.EllieandRuthiehad been super sweet, and we were even going to go out for a girl’s night afterThanksgivingweekend, but we weren’t there just yet.Plus, they knewVince, so that might be a conflict of interest for them—especiallyRuthie, since she worked there.Iloved my sister, but she couldn’t keep her mouth shut and would absolutely say something in front ofVince, even if it wasn’t on purpose.

The food was cooking, andIwas still frustrated, soIdecided to use some of that pent-up energy to clean the apartment.Vincesaid he had a housekeeper come by once a month, but with three of us living here now, we were definitely making more of a mess.Iwanted to help out.Ialso needed to work out this frustration beforeIdid something stupid.Cleaningwas like therapy, except cheaper and with lemon-scented results.Now, the whole kitchen was spotless, the spices were alphabetized, andIdidn’t need bail money for whatIwanted to do to skinny businessBarbie.Itwas a win-win.

I was just about to put the cleaning spray away whenVincewalked into the kitchen.

“Smells good in here,” he said, smiling at me, butIshrieked, having not heard him come in.Howsomeone as big as him could move around so quietly was scary.

I leaned down to pick up the cleaning bottleIhad just dropped, whenVinceapologized.

“Sorry.Ithought you heard me come in the door,” he said, andIwas unable to answer sinceIwas still breathing hard, clearly becauseIhad just had five years scared off my life.

“Did you cook and clean the house?” he asked with a stunned look on his face, andIrealized maybeIshould be doing this more often so he wasn’t so shocked whenIactually helped out.

“Yes, butIneed to help out more around here since you won’t let us pay for anything,”Itold him, and admittedly, there was a bit of a sharpness to my voice. “Ididn’t clean the whole house.Justunloaded the dishes, wiped down the counters, alphabetized your spices, mopped the floor, and cleaned and reorganized your refrigerator.I’lltry to do more tomorrow in some of the other rooms.”

The smile that had been on his face whileIdetailed all the cleaningIdid was now suddenly gone.

“Cat,Ihave a housekeeper for most of that.Youdon’t need to do it,” he said.Istarted to speak, but he held his hand up to stop me. “AndwhileIappreciate your help,Idon’t use those spices often enough for it to matter if they are alphabetized.”

I knew he was teasing me, especially with the smirk on his face, but it angered me that he wouldn’t let me help more and was just brushing it off.Andhe didn’t even like me.Notthat ifIwas his girlfriend, it would meanIdidn’t need to cook and clean, but at leastIwould feel likeIwas contributing to something meaningful in his life, like his happiness.Butnow thatIknew he already had a girlfriend, his jabs at my offering to help bothered me even more.

“Laugh all you want, but when you’re looking for paprika, you’ll thank me,”Ispat back at him, sensing my fullLatinaattitude, asValliked to call it, coming out with a vengeance. “I’msorry.Ijust wanted to ensure you’d never mistake your coriander and cardamom!”

He snorted and looked at me with a small smile. “Idon’t even know what any of those are, butI’msure one day it will be appreciated.”

Yeah, by his girlfriend.Shewould probably appreciate it.Thethought of that made me even madder.

“You won’t letValand me pay you for rent or utilities or help out in any way!”

“That’s because family does those things for each other for free,”Vincesaid softly with kindness in his voice.

“ButI’mnot family,Vince,”Itried to tell him.

“Yeah, you are,” he said sternly to me, almost as if he was mad at me for even thinking otherwise, butIcorrected him.

“No,I’mnot,”Ishot back forcefully as he walked toward me and into my space.Hewas so closeIcould feel his breath on my face.

His hand came to my left cheek, and he spoke quietly but firmly.

“You may not be family by blood, but you mean just as much in every way that matters.”

BeforeIhad much time to even think about what he said, his mouth was on mine.Thekiss was soft and gentle at first, and then his lips pressed harder and shockwaves sprinted through my body.Then, what felt like too soon, he pulled away slowly.Hiseyes were intense on me, andIfelt the need to break the silence.

“I don’t think family kisses each other like that.”Igrinned at him, light, happy feelings coursing through me.

“No, butI’vewanted to do that since the dayImet you in person, and you stood there full of attitude with your hands on your hips arguing with me,” he said, grinning at me unrepentantly.

“You did?”Iasked, a little shocked at his words.Then, when he nodded back at me,Ismiled and decided to tell him my honest thoughts. “I’mglad you did.”

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