Page 21 of Betrayal & New Beginnings

Never in my life hadIcraved someone likeIcravedEllie.Itwas likeIwas a teenage boy all over again with no impulse control around girls.

That stops now, before you make an even bigger mistake.Oh, andJackkills you for touching his sister.

9

ELLIE

What the hell just happened?

One minuteIwas laughing; the nextWade’smouth was on mine, giving me the best kiss of my entire life.God, that man could kiss.Ididn’t have much experience outside ofRandall, since during my peak teenage years my parents died,Imoved to a new state with my grandma and started a new school, then my brother left, andIhelped pick up more of the workload around the house withGran.

I wasn’t upset about my limited experience.Itwas just thatIdidn’t know whetherRandallwas just not that great of a kisser or ifWadewas just that amazing.

AllIknew was thatIloved the feel of his beard – it both tickled and scratched my face, and oddlyIloved it.Whenhe stuck his tongue in my mouth,Ifelt something short-circuit in my brain.Myinsides warmed just at the memory of that kiss.Icould have spent hours kissingWade, but alas, that was part of the problem.

Getting involved with another man so soon afterRandallwas a bad idea, even if that man was nothing like him.Iknew from my conversations withTammyand the others at the pub as well as my brother thatWadewas nothing likeRandall.Sure,Randallhad friends, but he didn’t treat them the same way thatWadedid.Ifone of his friends or co-workers needed him,Wadewould do everything in his power to help, andIknew from my brother thatWadehad putJack’slife before his while they were overseas.

Jack would never get specific about any of his missions or locations, but he’d mentioned multiple times thatWadehad saved his life by tackling him to the ground right before a sniper would have hit and killed him.Randallwould never risk his life to save another, not even his own family.Oneof many red flagsIdidn’t see until it was too late.

Wade was a good man through and through.Thatstill didn’t mean it would be a good decision to get involved with him.ButWadewas the kind of man who made that kind of decision really hard.Hesmelled so good too, and when he grabbed my face…Sigh.Hiskiss was rough, but his hands grabbed my face gently, as though he was caressing me and soaking it in, yet some part of him lost control and he couldn’t get enough.Itotally understood that.I’dfelt the same, and then he’d ended it.Abruptly.He’deven apologized.Iwasn’t sure if that was because he regretted kissing me or he thoughtIdid.

Maybe he’d thought it inappropriate since he was my boss, or maybe because of what happened earlier in the day.And, yes, admittedly, it was a rough day, which brought me back to my original thought of how dumbIwas for falling forRandalland staying with him longer thanIshould have.Whycouldn’tIhave found a man likeWade, instead of a crazy person likeRandall?

God…Randall.Howhad he even found me?I’dtold himIwas coming toGeorgia, butI’dnever mentioned whereJacklived.I’dnever mentioned the new security company he was setting up with his friends, sinceJacknever really told me much about that to begin with.Randallnever seemed interested in wanting to visit my brother or even get to know him.Irealized now that should have been yet another red flag.Somany red flags.

My phone buzzed next to me, andIsaw it was a text fromRuthie.

HeyEllie, it’sRuthie.Ihope you don’t mind, butArchertold me what happened tonight at the pub.I’mso sorry.

Great.Isighed and leaned my head back to look at the ceiling.Wademust have alerted everyone atRangerShieldabout what had happened, includingRuthie.Thiswas so embarrassing.Anothermessage pinged on my phone, andIlooked down.

Ruthie:

I take self-defense classes two nights a week.Youcan totally say no, but you’re welcome to come with me if you want.

While it was embarrassing that word of tonight’s incident was spreading, it was also really sweet of her to reach out—especially since, on the surface, she seemed like an introvert.Besides,I’dalways thought about taking a self-defense class but never actually looked into it.Maybethis was a sign to finally do it.

Me:

HeyRuthie,Iwould love to.Thanksfor inviting me.Justlet me know when the next class is, andIwould love to come.

We made a plan to meetTuesdaymorning to go before we both had to be at work.

I decided to just go to bed and start fresh the next day.Icould pickWade’sbrain aboutRandalltomorrow on the way to his family’s house.

OhGod.Therewent the anxiety-meter again.Iwas going to meet his family.Ididn’t know whyIwas suddenly so nervous about that.Itwasn’t like we were together, andIwas meetingmyfuture family.

Oh, but that kiss.Iput my fingers to my lips and could still feel his lips on mine.Wouldhis family know we kissed?Ishook my head.Don’tbe ridiculous,Ithought.Justbe yourself, and go there to enjoy a home-cooked meal and meetWade’sfamily.ThisisJack’sbest friend.Youare meeting his best friend’s family.That’show we approach this.

At least, that was howIconvinced myselfIwould treat this lunch tomorrow.Thesister ofWade’sbest friend.

AsIclimbed into my bed,Itried to calm my brain from all that had happened today.Nosense stressing about meetingWade’sfamily orRandallfinding me any more tonight when my brain was officially fried.

Remember whatGranused to say.Focuson the positives and thingsIcan control.

I was finally starting to make friends.

I enjoyed my job.

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