Page 78 of Resist Me

The way he rolled his eyes made me laugh. “It’s about Willow, actually. And you.”

Immediately, I sat up. I instinctively put a little distance between us while I waited for what he was going to say.

“She told me about her past.”

My gaze snapped to his. “What? Why would she do that?”

“To make me understand you more, apparently. I’m sorry. I know that it’d be better to hear it from you, but…”

Swiping a hand down my face, I tried to calm my racing heart. Willow’s story was her own and she could tell it if she wanted to, but I felt like I’d been violated in a way. I wasn’t ready for Lincoln to see what lurked underneath my skin, the ugly monsters that crawled through my veins and twisted my mind. Only Willow and Kai knew the extent of it.

I sighed after a minute. “That’s why you’re being so nice to me.”

His brow tightened. “No, she just told me today. I’m not treating you any differently than I would if I didn’t know.”

“Of course you are. It’s just the natural reaction. People start tiptoeing around you and any time something happens, they look at you with concern. I can’t stand it. It didn’t even happen to me, so you don’t need to pity me just because I failed her.”

I moved to stand, but he pulled me down by my arm. When I shook him off, he rolled to his knees. I fought him, but he planted himself on me, straddling my hips. He managed to grab my wrists and pushed them onto the bed on either side of my head.

“Let me go,” I demanded.

“No, you don’t get to walk out of here just because I can see you. You’re West Densmore. You don’t run and hide from things because they’re hard.”

Craning my neck upward as much as I could, I glared at him. “You don’t know who I am.”

“I’m trying to. That’s why you don’t get to push me away. You want to be mad at me and shutter yourself, get angry and lash out? What, because your mom died? Because your dad is a dick and blames you for something that wasn’t your fault? We all have shit, West, and I’m so fucking sorry you’ve had to deal with all of that, but you’re not running. I haven’t tiptoed around you and I’m not being nice to you because I pity you.”

He released one of my wrists and brushed his thumb along my cheekbone. I blinked rapidly, averting my eyes. Something was bubbling up, ready to explode out of me. I wanted to throw him off of me and hit something. Anything to get rid of this ache in my chest that should have faded with time.

“I touch you like this because I care,” he went on softly. “If you need to lose control, go right ahead, but you’re doing it here. Let me see you, West.”

“You don’t want that.”

“Oh, I really do. I want everything.”

He didn’t mean these things. It was because of what Willow told him. He was on some white knight shit and if I gave into him, I’d only get hurt more when he decided I was too much. There were some things I’d learned a long time ago. If my own father couldn’t love me, nobody else could either. Not when they eventually saw me the way he did.

“You won’t talk about it,” he said. I shook my head. “Then don’t. Just stop hiding.”

I arched up and knocked my forehead against his. He swore, careening to the side. It gave me the chance to get up and leave, but I stopped. My breaths were coming quickly and my mind was racing between my options. With a growl, I flipped onto my knees and pushed him onto his back.

“Don’t try to open me up,” I said.

His eyes flashed with something- anger maybe. When he tried to sit up, I held him down by his shoulders.

“Fucking leave then,” he suggested. It sounded more like a dare. “When you’ve calmed down and thought about it, you’ll probably show up again anyway.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You’re too afraid to actually admit you feel something for me when we’re not pre or post-sex. And commitment? Forget it. I bet you’re the type that’ll bail early so somebody doesn’t have the chance to leave you first.”

My fist connected with his face, whipping it to the side. Grabbing his jaw in a firm grip, I glared down at him, at the blood on his lip. He stared back, eyes narrowed, but he didn’t react.

Fuck me.

When I kissed him, I tasted copper mixed with mint. His fingers dug into my sides painfully, a remnant of his own frustration. Underneath me, I could feel his dick harden. Mine followed suit.

Was I toxic? Probably, but he was right. If I left, I would’ve come back again. He’d put some sort of hex on me and I was mad about it.

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