Page 96 of Feel Free to Scream

If I learned one thing last week it’s that Keller genuinely loves shopping. Especially shopping for stuff for me to wear. Whenever I wear the clothes he picked, I catch a look of smug appreciation. And he adores removing them from me.

“InMichigan?” he says, the same way some people might say, in hell. “Do you guys even have decent shopping places here?”

I think for a second. “I’d be offended, but I truly don’t know.”

Firstly, because I don’t know what stores he would consider decent, and secondly, because I could never have afforded them, or been allowed to shop there before, so I never looked.

“I’m not going to barge in and introduce myself to your grandmother,” he reassures me, pinpointing the reason behind my hesitancy. “You have good reasons to not want that yet. I’ll respect it. But you’re also going in knowing that this will be a fucking terrible time. So I’ll be there. At the cafe. I checked—there’s one a few doors away from her room. You deal with her, you come find me when you’re done, andwe’llgo shopping. How about that?”

He truly does get me, doesn’t he? He cuts through all the bullshit, straight to my problem, and dishing out nothing but support and reassurance. It’s crazy that he’s able to understand me so well, so fast.

“In Michigan?” I echo his outraged tone. “I don’t think so.”

“Then we’ll just have to stay in our awesome suite. Try to find a way to occupy our time.” He grins.

That sounds good to me.

38

CLAIRE

“So, you’re here, hm?”

It would be inaccurate to say I don’t know this tone of my grandmother’s voice. I’ve heard it my whole life. Except typically she uses it to talk to my mother.

Bracing myself, I walk in. “I told you I’d come at five. Did they check you in all right?”

She was admitted at four, and I know the private care Keller arranged for her means that she would have been shown to her room right away.

“Yes. They’ve been pleasant this time—none of that waiting around for hours I get when my insurance is footing the bill. I’m truly blessed to have been chosen for this grant. But none of that. You, young lady, are getting yourself into some trouble, I can tell. What sort of person stops talking to her family and breaks up with her boyfriend offour yearsmere days after moving away? Something’s very wrong with you.”

It’s a struggle not to roll my eyes. Maybe I would have called if she were interested in speaking to me about something other than Noah. “Noah and I didn’t fit. I’m glad it’s over. But I didn’t come back to discuss him. I’m here so you have company before and after the operation. I understand they’re taking you in at six?”

“Yes. Bit late for a procedure, hm?”

It is. Likely so I could be here without missing classes. Keller is the kind of guy to think about everything. “Maybe.”

She’s not to be deterred, determined. “And well,Iwant to talk about Noah. His grandparents are my friends. How can I face them after what you’ve done to the poor boy?”

Jesus.

So far, I’ve enjoyed wine and cocktails and champagne because they tasted good in fun, social settings. For the first time, I understand people who drink as a copying mechanism when dealing with stupidity. I could down a glass of Pouilly-Fumé right now. Where’s Arlo’s chilled wine selection when we need it?

“You can tell them people break up all the time. Noah’s not that bothered.”

And that’s true. After a few days of insults, he gave up. I didn’t even have to block him.

“That’s not what he told me,” she snaps.

A knock interrupts us, thank god. Grateful, I turn, expecting a nurse, but it isn’t. Instead, I find myself face to face with my mother.

I don’t see her very often. When I do, it’s hard to really think of her as a parent. She’s too young, too pretty, too confident and aloof. Like a cool aunt. And that’s the role she’s had in my life in any case.

She’s holding a bouquet in one hand. “Oh, here you are! Glad I didn’t get lost!”

Striding in, Hyacinth Fairmont seems to bring in sunshine with her.

She’s my height, my body type, and my face. Her hair’s a warmer blonde. She assured me it used to be as crazy as mine, but her hairdresser tames it into well behaved curls instead of my cloudy mess.