Page 103 of The Arrow and the Alder

“Not really, no.” He took two steps to the table and refilled his cup. Water sloshed. “There are only a few of us who can.”

“You’re always a stag?”

“Onlya stag.” He set down the flagon. “I am a shifter. The ability manifests in youth, and honestly, the first time you do it is rather painful.” His gaze flickered to her, his brow furrowed as if his mind had briefly gone to some other subject entirely, and he lifted his cup and took another long sip.

“Are you still you when you’re in that form?” Seph asked carefully.

“Yes and no. I know my own mind, but my proclivities as a stag compete with my kith form, and the longer I remain a stag, the stronger those proclivities become.”

Seph remembered what he’d said before about how he’d stayed a beast for so long it’d frightened him. “Your hair is the exact same shade of black,” she added. “It even reflects the light in the same way. There’s almost a…burgundy hue to it sometimes. Your eyes are the same steel-gray too, and you still smell like…”the forest, she’d meant to say, but his lips were curling, and she felt a flare of heat all over.

She raised the cup to her lips again. “Anyway, how long have I been asleep?”

“Three days.”

Seph had expected him to say something along the lines ofhours, and the cup froze at her lips as she gaped at him.

Alder gave her a stern look. “That arrow nearly killed you, Josephine. It was fatefully close to your heart.”

I had to cut out the arrow.

“I didn’t realize it was that serious,” she said.

“Oh, it’s worse. It was also enchanted to prevent your blood from clotting.”

Ah, that explained why her blood had flowed like a river.

“Thankfully, Sienne is a healer, which means she knows a good deal about unwriting those particular kinds of enchantments. Though there was a moment…” His voice trailed off, his brow creased, and his gaze flickered over her before he glanced away and took another sip of his water.

“And I imagine she also knows about Abecka by now,” Seph said quietly.

“She does.” His gaze settled back on her. “They all do.”

Worry needled at the back of Seph’s mind as their present circumstances drew into focus. She was still grieving the fact that she’d just lost her great-grandmother, but the people of Light had lost the queen they’d known much longer, and there was a subtle question in Alder’s tone that Seph didn’t much like. “Who will lead them?”

He studied her. “Who, indeed?”

Seph didn’t like the look on his face either—not at all. She felt a twitch of panic and she clutched the cup to her breast. “Certainly, they don’t expect me to…that I…” She let the unspoken question linger.

“YouareJakobián’s heir, Josephine.”

“Alder, I can’t stay here! I know I said that I’d stay and fight, but that was only because I couldn’t get through the Rift! Once we defeat this curse, and the Rift is safe for me to pass through, assuming I’m still alive by the end of it, I need to?—”

“Careful. You’re going to spill water all over yourself.”

Seph realized that, in her exasperation, she’d taken to pacing and waving her arms like a belligerent. She set the cup on the mantel over the hearth of embers. “Alder, I need to go back to Harran. To my family.”

“You can’t have a life there, Josephine. You know that.” He wasn’t saying it to be cruel. It was simply truth.

“But that doesn’t mean I’m going to stay here!”

“Where do you intend to go?”

Seph’s chest rose and fell quickly, and she turned to face the embers, one hand braced upon the mantel. This conversation was making her alarmingly out of breath, and she knew it had to do with all the blood loss. “I don’t know. I’ll figure that out after, but I must return to my family. I can’t just abandon them—Iwon’t—and little Nora…” Seph chewed on her bottom lip. This wasn’t at all what she wanted to talk about right now.

Linnea’s words came back to haunt her. They’d cut at the time…because they were true. Seph didn’t disappear into the woods strictly for Nora. She went for herselftoo, for the freedom it afforded, for the solitude. What would be required of her if she inevitably stayed here? If the curse was eradicated and the war ended, and she made sure that her family was safe—what sort of life would Seph have in the Court of Light? One thing she knew for certain: she was so weary of others laying claim to her life.

“What if you brought your family here?” Alder asked, blowing right through the blockades of her resolve.

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