Page 98 of Misery and Ecstasy

Squeezing her eyes shut, she places her head back on my chest and takes a deep breath.

It’s only been two days since she got out of the hospital. Tomorrow, she’ll start her chemo and radiation treatments.

She’s already tired, and I know she’s beyond stressed.

I’m trying to appear as easy-going as I can on the surface. But inside, I’m fucking dying. I’m terrified. I’m doing anything and everything I can to keep my mind off what’s coming so I don’t think about our future and all of the plans I’ve dreamed about going up in flames.

I do my best not to think about myself, too.

This time is about McKinsey.

All that matters is her.

I’ve been keeping as busy as possible when I’m not next to her—which isn’t often. It’s been anything but easy to quit, so I’ve been jonesing for a smoke for days now. But the moment I found out Kins has cancer, there was no fucking question about it. The cigarettes had to go.

In an effort to keep her as worry-free as possible, I’ve been secretly texting with several people without her knowing about it.

She’s concerned for her patients, but I’ve assured her they will continue to receive care. Marissa has opened up her schedule for a couple of them. For those she isn’t able to get on her own schedule, she found places for them with other therapists she networks with.

My phone vibrates with a text from Olivia.

Olivia:

We’re out front.

She and I have been working together to figure out the best way to tell McK’s mother and Alexander about what’s been going on. Kins has been putting off telling her. I know she will probably give us the silent treatment once she finds out what we did, but both Olivia and I agreed this is the best way. We couldn’t tell her ahead of time either. The anticipation of her mother’s arrival would have only upset her more.

We’d decided we would take the brunt of the information exchange off of McKinsey’s plate for her also. Well, that Olivia would. The thought of having to do so overwhelmed Kins. Olivia had Cheryl and Alexander meet her at McKinsey’s house earlier today where she was planning to explain everything that has been going on and all the information we have regarding her diagnosis.

It took three hours before Cheryl was calm enough to get into Olivia’s car to let her drive her over here.

Me:

On my way.

“Hey, I have to go outside real quick. Are you going to be okay?”

“What’s going on?” McKinsey narrows her gaze on me, but I won’t tell her anything until I have the reassurance that this visit won’t affect her in a negative way. “You’re not going for a smoke are you? I know it’s been hard, but you’ve been doing a great job.”

“No, no. Nothing like that. I just have to go take care of something. I’ll be right back.” Standing, I reach for the remote on the table. Sometimes, the brightness of the television screen hurts her eyes, so we darkened it as much as possible, enabling her to watch for short periods of time. “Take this, and find somethingrelaxingto watch. No crime shows, got it?”

She flips me off. It’s the new way she’s adopted to tell all of us to fuck off since rolling her eyes causes her too much pain.

“That’s my girl.” I shoot her a wink and a smile before walking to the front door.

I nod to Olivia who is standing next to her car with a reluctant expression on her face and her hands tucked into her back pockets. Taking the steps down to the gravel drive two at a time, I lock eyes on Cheryl and Alexander Sanders.

Despite the skeptical look on her face, I immediately see McKinsey’s features in her mother’s.

“I’m Draven.” I approach Cheryl with my hand outstretched.

This may be the most off-the-wall meet the parents moment, but I’ll still try to be as respectful as possible. Until it comes to laying down the law, then all bets are off. She can be a bitch to me all she wants, but I won’t tolerate her being nasty to Kins.

“Where’s my daughter?” Cheryl ignores both my introduction and my hand.

Respect may be a challenge with this one. It clearly won’t be returned.

“Hi, that’s Cheryl. I’m Alexander. It’s … nice to meet you.” Taking my hand in his, at least her stepdad tries to appear diplomatic.

---