Page 4 of No Time Off

It took me a few seconds to get there. “Ah, your little black cloud?”

“Exactly,” she said and then lowered her voice. “Contingency plans should be made.”

I was way ahead of her. “Fair enough, and I do admit contingency planning is already a significant piece of my calculation. That’s why my top priority for a honeymoon destination involves a remote location where nothing exciting ever happens. Like, ever. After what we’ve been through lately, peace and quiet is just what we need. I also sought a resort a long way from anyone who might know us. After all, we don’t want a repeat of Xavier and Basia’s honeymoon.”

“You mean when I ran into them by accident at their not-so-secret honeymoon resort and got mistaken for the bride?” she asked.

“That’sexactlywhat I mean.”

“Well, then, why don’t you go first with your selection? I’d love to hear about a place where my little black cloud can’t get us into any trouble.”

“No, you go first,” I insisted. “Just be sure to outline your decision factors. It would help me clarify how strongly I feel about mine.”

“All right.” She opened her purse and pulled out her phone, swiping for a bit until she found what she wanted before setting it back down on the table. She grinned, her eyes alight with excitement. “I, too, was looking for a place far away from here where we could enjoy spectacular scenery, privacy, and a limited population. It was critical that any travel agency or resort we might choose must have an impeccable reputation for discretion.”

“Sounds like an excellent criterion,” I said, sipping my wine and greatly enjoying the conversation. “I presume your location is somewhere we haven’t been before…and more importantly, it doesn’t have spiders and snakes.”

“If only,” she said. “It pains me to admit there are indeed spiders and snakes at my destination, but my research indicates most of them are reclusive and uninterested in humans. As to your point, though, it’s a location we haven’t been to before.”

I thought it over, decided to take a guess. “Australia? I hear there aren’t a lot of people in the outback, only animals.”

“True, but in Australia, spiders are the size of small dogs, and snakes are everywhere, and they’re all venomous.” She spoke a bit emphatically and then lowered her voice. “Well, maybe notall, but tons of them are. Regardless, I do want to visit Australia someday, if I have proper protection against said spiders and snakes. But Australia is not what I have in mind for our honeymoon.”

I leaned forward in anticipation. “So, what do you have in mind? Pray tell.”

Pausing, she spread out her hands. “Picture two glorious weeks alone among the greatest venues in Patagonia. We could visit some spectacular locales and stay at an exclusive resort on the shores of the Pacific Ocean, a luxurious boutique hotel near Tierra del Fuego and a private hunting lodge in the Andes.”

Patagonia was an interesting and unexpected choice. I cocked my head, considering. “Argentina or Chile?”

“Chile,” she said. “For fourteen glorious days, we hike the dramatic granite peaks of Torres del Paine, explore the waters of the Chilean Lake District, see the Tierra del Fuego, explore the fabulous wine region near Santiago, and then visit the mysterious and wonderful Atacama Desert.”

I raised an eyebrow in surprise. “Did you say hike? That truly surprises me, because I thought you’d sworn off any such activity after being chased through the mountains of Papua New Guinea and across the Amazon rainforest in Brazil. Not at the same time of course.”

She shuddered. “No, not those kinds of hikes. My idea of honeymoon hiking is being transported to the mountains in luxury vehicle with snacks, where we can stroll from amazing overlook to overlook at our own pace. Not the hauling-myself-through-rugged-terrain, or sweat-pouring-down-my-back, scared-out-of-my-mind, all-while-avoiding-someone-who-wants-to-kill-me hiking.”

“Fair enough,” I said with a chuckle. “I just wanted to clear that up before I inadvertently suggested something inappropriate.”

She gave me a smile that could still make my heart skip a beat. “So, what do you think so far, Slash?”

I had to give it to her—it was an excellent suggestion. “Honestly, it sounds amazing. How would we get around?”

She consulted the notes on her phone. “We could rent a car and drive ourselves, but if we want to make this as relaxing as possible, I think private drivers and guides would be the best approach. Amanda, our wedding planner, recommended a tour company that has a long-standing reputation for discretion. They select resorts and vendors who highly value their clients’ privacy—not that anyone, hopefully, would recognize us outside Washington.”

I loved the sound of that. “That seems like a wonderful adventure with a mix of activities that will keep us on our toes. I’ve always wanted to go to Chile and see the southern Andes. It’s a great idea,cara.”

“I have brochures of all the places we would stay and can send the rest via our personal, encrypted file-sharing app, but first I’d like to hear what you came up with.” She set her phone down and put her elbows on the table before looking directly into my eyes. “Your turn.”

I took another sip of my wine and leaned back in my chair. “I admit I took the opposite approach. Instead of choosing a so-called experience vacation, I opted for an ultra-private location where nothing ever happens and no one would know us. I just wanted to get away to somewhere we could relax, do nothing if we wanted, and spend a couple ofverylow-key weeks to be alone and reset. I imagined our focus to be on each other and not the craziness that seems to follow us around.”

“Is there such a place on Earth?” Her eyes lit up with interest. “A lovely, quiet retreat where nothing happens? Where no one knows us, and even if my little black cloud followed, it wouldn’t matter?”

“I can’t make promises about the little black cloud, but even if it does follow, I doubt there’s much it could do in this place. That’s how remote it is.”

“And where exactly is this magical, secretive place?”

“Rarotonga, initially. It’s the main island of the Cook Islands, and where the capital, Avarua, is located.” I carefully watched her expression to gauge interest and saw she was definitely intrigued. “After a week there, we’d travel to another island nearby called Aitutaki, which is an even more secluded resort island—popular with honeymooners for exactly that reason.”

Her brow wrinkled in a certain way which often happened when she recalled information. “The Cook Islands are in the southern Pacific Ocean, northeast of New Zealand and somewhere between American Samoa and French Polynesia. Right?”

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