Page 49 of Take Me to the Wedding

Oh. Lilly.Hadn’t thought of her for a while. And right now, I was wondering about Sam. “What turned you off of love?” I asked before I could censor myself.

Another withering look. I definitely should’ve censored myself. “The day I discuss my love life with you will be the day the earth freezes over. I will literallyneverdiscuss my love life with you.”

“As it should be.” What was I doing? Flirting, asking her out-of-the-blue personal questions. I couldn’t tell her that I no longer thought Lilly was everything I’d thought she was—she’d think I was as unreliable and superficial as she’d initially believed. I cleared my throat. “Now then. Back to business.”

I took her cup, and she hiked herself up to sit on the top rung of the rail fence.

Then I stole a sip while she was getting situated. “You’re right. It’s good.”

She took a sip. “Really good.” Then she held it back out to me.

“Aha, so youdidlearn to share in preschool after all.”

She rolled her eyes.

A weird idea popped into my head. On impulse, I pulled out my phone. “Let’s take a selfie.”

She laughed. “A what?”

“Oh, come on. It’s the perfect moment.” I held the phone at arm’s length, got the rising sun behind us, and said “Smile,” while I clicked.

She humored me, standing close and putting our heads together. And it turned out to be a really nice shot. I took a bunch of photos, somehow desperate to capture this exact moment. “There. Farm weekend captured for posterity.” That wasn’t why I did it. I wanted to remember forever exactly how she looked right at this moment, sort of glowing, fresh and beautiful, with the rolling hills and the dewy new morning as a backdrop. And I wanted me in it too. The two of us together. Like I said, it was an impulse, and I went with it.

“So, did you see Lilly last night?” Sam asked. “Did you go for a walk in the moonlight? Did you take her down by the lake and pour out your heart? Did you get all those pent-up feelings out on the table?”

“You’re making fun of me.”

She blinked.

“You said you would help me. So that should mean not judging me.”

Silence. I could feel her considering that. “You’re right. I’m sorry. Sometimes I can be a little sarcastic.”

My turn to lift a brow. “A little?”

A flash of vulnerability sparked in her eyes, but it passed quickly. She heaved a sigh that sounded sad and resigned. “Sorry. You called it. I don’t really believe in love,” she said. “I mean, I just don’t.”

I respected the admission, but I wanted desperately to understand. “How can anyone not believe in love? I mean, love is… everything.”

She took another sip of coffee and glanced out across the misty meadow. “It rarely works out.”

“I wonder, with a magical grandma, why you’re such a cynic.” I scanned her face intensely. This was the most honest thing she’d ever said. But she stared into the distance, her eyes focused straight ahead, and they weren’t revealing any secrets. At least not to me. “Haven’t you ever been in love before?”

“I never wanted to be,” she said. Then she faced me. “Look, my mom—she got pregnant young. And she married my dad, but she shouldn’t have. She didn’t go to college—she just worked and struggled endlessly to make ends meet. And tried to find a better guy. Only none of them were better, you know what I mean? She’d come and go, in and out of my life, and then she got pregnant with Wynn. By the time Wynn was eight, she left for good. Which was probably the best thing, because our grandma was amazing.”

I was so bowled over that I almost had to sit down. How had she accomplished all that with all she’d been through? How had she survived? I had to stop myself from asking more questions, because I sensed she’d shut me down, but I wanted to know everything about her. Hell, I had to stop myself from gathering her up in my arms. I wanted to hug all that pain right out of her.

“So you see,” she continued, “your assessment of me is spot-on. Iamjaded and cynical. Nothing can convince me that love is a big old fairy tale. How are you so certain that Lilly’s the love of your life?”

“I’m not. But I needed to see her again to find out.” That was the truth. And I forced myself to stop there. I’d already found out that my romantic fantasies hadn’t panned out, but I kept that to myself. “My mom and dad—they’re still in love, even after all these years. I wouldn’t say what they have is a fairy tale. They’d be the first to call it hard work, but they still stick together through everything. From them I learned that your true love is someone who gets you. Who has your back no matter what. Who you miss when you’re not with them because you find yourself wanting to tell them all the little things that have happened through your day. Who’s kind and smart and fun.” I grinned because she looked so perplexed, like I was speaking a foreign language or something. “Someone who doesn’t frown at you and give you a headache every time you interact.”

“Ha, okay, I get that last part. Has Lilly had your back?” She must’ve seen my surprise, because she said, “I’m asking because I’m worried that this romantic notion of love you carry has clouded your vision.”

I stiffened. “You’re starting to sound like my parents.” And my friends, to be honest. Had everyone figured this out before I did?

And what was the answer to that question? I’d always thought of myself as needing to have Lilly’s back—but failing. Had Lilly ever hadmyback?

“Maybe they don’t want you to get your heart broken again.” She assessed me carefully, then said, “I mean, I hope that’s not the case. But a lot of times if someone’s friends or family doesn’t agree with their choice, they might be right.”

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