Page 58 of Take Me Home for Christmas

Take a good look, people,I forced myself to think.Because here I am. Could that drink get here any quicker? Because I sure needed it.

While I waited, I said hi to—well, everyone I could. Old neighbors, teachers, our family doc who’d written me a recommendation letter for med school, my old dentist, and anyone else I could. Once I started, I just kept going. Finally, I ended up back at my family’s table.

“Where are the bridesmaids?” Caleb asked, taking a sip of his drink.

“It’s not a wedding reception,” I said.

“No bridesmaids?” he said, looking disappointed. But then he squeezed my shoulder, and it occurred to me that he wasn’ta complete Neanderthal. He was only trying to make me laugh. Was Caleb actually…maturing?

“Hey,” he said, smiling enough so that his dimple showed, also making me feel a strong sisterly fondness toward him. “If you need us, you’ve got Liam and me right here.”

I hugged him. “Thanks.”

Just then, Brax returned. Caleb gave him a little nod, which was cordial but not much more. I wished he would dial down the big-brotherly thing just a little.

Brax handed me a drink. “I have a question for you.”

“Okay.” I took a sip and coughed. “I do too. What’s in this?”

“A lot of vodka. Drink up.”

“Do I look that nervous?”

He scanned me up and down. “Yes.” As I forced down another gulp, he lowered his voice. “How was the um—you know—with him?”

I narrowed my eyes. “The um-you-know?” I thought about that. “Are you asking me about sex with Charlie?” I considered my answer carefully. “If you’re trying to take my mind off this, that may just have worked.”

“Hear me out, okay? He doesn’t strike me as the kind of guy who would make sure you were having a good time too.” He pointed to Charlie and Erin, who were now greeting a long line of people. “Just look at him. He’s talking to everyone, shaking everyone’s hands. No arm around her, not taking up her hand, not introducing her to people. It’s like it’s The Charlie Show, and she’s just along for the ride.”

I took another sip of the drink, which now finally went down less like a fireball and more like a cozy, radiant campfire that you warm your hands near. Brax—and Dina—had made an oddly perceptive point. Charlie had always wanted what he wanted. He wasn’t one to stop, slow down, and make sure his partner was on board. That fit perfectly with the way he’d ended things too.

A memory suddenly hit me, of the day I’d driven to Milwaukee and moved into my efficiency apartment, where I didn’t know a soul. I was exhausted. Scared.

And absolutely exhilarated. Thrilled to be starting over. Thrilled to be on my own. Feeling like my life was about to begin.

I remembered that feeling so clearly now. I hadn’t thought this at the time, but now I understood that it had been the feeling of freedom. A freedom that maybe I wouldn’t have felt or maybe even needed if things had been right with Charlie.

“Are you okay?” Brax asked, touching my arm.

My throat felt too closed off to answer, but I managed a smile. Took a deep breath. Set down my drink, took up his hands, and looked into his warm brown eyes that somehow managed to calm me and unsettle me at the same time. “Thank you for being here. For getting me here. And for making me feel…not alone.”

He leaned over and whispered in my ear, “If I were your partner, I’d make sure you never felt alone when you were with me.” He looked concerned. And sincere. And steady. And…something more.

A feeling hit me hard in my gut. Brax, the guy who basically said he couldn’t show up in a relationship, did—every single time. He’d come to a small town in the middle of the Wisconsin countryside to have my back. And he kept doing it, over and over.

Though my nerves, I smiled. “Somehow, I already knew that,” I said. “But you can show me exactly what you mean by that later if you like.”

A slow smile spread over his beautiful face. “Happily.”

All right, then. I set down my drink and gave him a nod. It was time to do something I really needed to do.

“Go get ’em, tiger.” How could I fail with all the belief I saw in his eyes?

I kissed him and headed over to the happy couple.

Charlie was standing near one of the front tables, talking to Henrietta and Jake, who happened to be the couple we used to hang with the most. Truthfully, after our breakup, I’d lost touch. It was just too hard.

I felt like I was starring in a weird dream, where I entered an alternate reality and did things I could never in a million years have pictured myself doing. This one went like “One day, you’ll be at Charlie’s wedding party and congratulate him on his marriage to someone else.”

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