Page 55 of This Loving Feeling (Mirror Lake)

“Sounds like your question really is, is the sex still good?” Alex set down her glass with a thud on the surface of the wooden table. “Damn right it still is.”

God bless Alex, whose bluntness didn’t disappear with her tipsiness. “Even after twelve years of marriage and four kids?” Sam asked. “I mean, doesn’t it get ... boring?” Oh, she needed a drink. Where the hell was her margarita?

“Girls, is that Effie?” Olivia asked.

Everyone turned to see Sam’s grandma scooting down the single bar aisle holding a beer, joining a table of Assisted Living friends. She wore a brightly flowered shift dress with her orthopedic tennies, not her usual ensembles of jogging suits or colorful cardigans and dark pants.

Sam closed her eyes and prayed.Please, God, don’t let her see us. Just for tonight. Just for one—

“Yoo-hoo,” Effie called, waggling her fingers. “Hi, girls!” Sam cracked a smile and waved back halfheartedly, hoping not to encourage her to join them.

“Since when does Effie drink?” Meg asked in a whisper.

“Since she’s been going through some kind of crisis,” Olivia said. “Does anyone know what it is?”

“She told me she’s sick of being the nice grandma, whatever that means,” Sam said.

“Effie not wanting to be nice is like Santa barhopping instead of delivering presents on Christmas Eve.” Alex pulled a nacho off the pile, the melted cheese stretching all the way to her appetizer plate. “Completely out of character.” She took a bite and turned to Sam.

“To answer your question as honestly as I can after three drinks,” Alex continued, “when you get married you find there’s a lot of different kinds of sex. Makeup sex, haven’t-had-sex-in-a-while sex, blow-off-steam sex, I-really-love-you-and-I’m-so-into-you sex, or I-don’t-really-feel-like-it-but-you’re-into-it-so-that’s-okay-too sex. It’s all good. Marriage is hard but sex can really help to get a couple back on the same page. When we’re not totally exhausted and falling asleep, that is.”

“We always try to have date night once a week,” Olivia said. “It’s easy to get caught up in all the kids’ activities all the time and forget about time with one another.”

Everyone looked expectantly at Meg, who blushed deeply. “Oh, come on you all. I’m not going to lower myself by talking about my sex life.”

Olivia nudged her. “We already know all about that, Meg.” She looked around the table and smiled. “She’s Hot for Doctor.”

Judging by the way she blushed, Sam knew it was true. These women were totally in love with her crazy brothers.Ew.

“Is there a problem with Harris?” Meg asked gently. Maybe Meg didn’t want to talk about her own sex life, but it appeared she had no trouble asking about Sam’s.

“No! Of course not. Absolutely not.” Finally, finally, her drink arrived and Sam took a big gulp. The slushy coldness slid easily down her dry throat. But that didn’t make it easier to talk. What could she say? That in bed Harris was sweet, so sweet, accommodating to her needs, but she often ended up ... faking it? A lot. So she took another sip.

“You know,” Olivia said gently. “It’s not just about the sex. It’s stuff like when you’ve had a really rough day and he rubs your feet as you sit there and watchDancing with the Starstogether.”

“With Tom it’sNaked and Afraid,” Alex said. “He tapes it every week so we can watch it after the kids are asleep. He needs to be prepared for survival after nuclear Armageddon. Kind of endearing, you know?”

“Sounds like he’s been doing too many disaster drills with the other first responders in town,” Olivia said.

“I think it’s touching,” Meg said. “How about when you’re exhausted and a kid is crying in the middle of the night and he gets up instead?”

“Sometimes things get off track and you have to work to get them back on,” Alex said. “Like, when the kids were little and we were dog tired, super exhausted all the time. One night we left them with a sitter and walked down the street to the B and B and checked in and fooled around until we had to go home. We ordered pizza and ate it in bed. It was so fun.”

“We could have watched the kids all night for you,” Olivia said. “Or all weekend. Why didn’t you ask?” That was the great thing about having a ton of family in town. Instasitters and Instacousins.

“It was spontaneous. We just did it on impulse. We walked three blocks but you would’ve thought we’d flown to Vegas for the night.”

Sam mulled over Alex’s Vegas comment. She’d used words likespontaneousandfun. Those two traits were not exactly a big part of Harris’s gene code. Plus, he’d think it was a waste to spend money like that for just a few hours. He was great and thoughtful about bringing her gifts ... but when was the last time they’d spent an evening together and just vegged out on the couch? Hung out and ate ice cream? She’d been chalking all of his recent behavior up to his being overworked and stressed. She’d cut him slack because of the pressure he was under. But what if this was the norm? Life was stressful. The stress wasn’t going to stop after the case was over.

From across the table, Meg was staring at her. Sam knew that look. She was reading her emotions in that empathic way Meg had. “It’s all about how he treats you, Samantha,” she said.

“Harris treats me very well,” Sam said and flashed her biggest smile. He did. Look at all the surprises—tickets to shows, flowers for no reason. He loved her. So why was she obsessed about sex? Besides, Harris was well-liked and really good-looking. Maybeshewas the problem. And there was no way she was bringing that up.

The table grew quiet. “Look, I just asked a question, okay?” Sam said. “Don’t go reading all kinds of stuff into it. I mean, I’ve been dating him for six years. I—I think he’s going to ask me to marry him soon.”

“That’s great Sam,” Olivia said, squeezing her hand. “We’re happy for you.” But she sounded kind of lukewarm. Guarded.

Meg sighed. “Forgive me for this in advance. But a marriage proposal isn’t something you earn. It’s not a prize to be dangled in front of you that you win if you’re good enough.”

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