Page 25 of Finders Keepers

“No problem at all,” he says, straightening up without pushing.

I feel Sophie’s grip tighten on my leg. The earlier lightness from playing with Tommy has vanished, replaced by the familiar tension I recognize all too well. My anxiety has transferred to her like a current between us.

I kneel down beside her, turning my back to the others to create a small private space between us. “Hey, Soph,” I whisper, brushing a loose strand of hair from her face. “Everything’s okay. We’re just meeting some new people, that’s all.”

“You scared me, Mama,” she whispers back, her blue eyes wide and searching mine.

My heart clenches. How much has she noticed over the years? How many times has she seen my fear and absorbed it into her tiny body?

“I’m not scared anymore,” I tell her, hoping it’s true. “We’re going to have fun again, okay? Maybe we can ride the carousel next.”

She studies my face for a moment, then nods slowly. “Promise?”

“Promise.” I give her nose a gentle tap, earning a small smile.

Ms. Lucy claps her hands together. “Dr. Mitchell, why don’t you join us? We were just heading to the carousel.”

The carousel is at the far end of the fair. I hold tight to Sophie’s small hand as we weave through the crowd, the smell of cotton candy and popcorn floating on the evening breeze. Ms. Lucy walks between Gavin and me, chattering about the fair’s history and how it’s grown over the years. I keep my eyes fixed ahead or on Sophie, though I can’t help but catch fragments of Gavin’s responses in his deep, warm voice.

I don’t look at him. Don’t engage. Keep walking.

The neon lights from the carnival games paint the ground in shifting patterns of blue, red, and yellow. Sophie’s grip tightens on my hand as we pass a particularly loud game where people are throwing darts at balloons.

“Look, rings!” Tommy points to a booth where dozens of glass bottles gleam under strings of lights. “Can we play? Please?”

Molly laughs. “One more game, then we have to head home, we have an early day at the shop tomorrow morning.”

“Okay. Sophie, you wanna play too?” Tommy bounces on his toes, looking at my daughter with hopeful eyes.

She grips my hand tighter looking up at me with uncertainty. Before I can respond, Gavin speaks up.

“Here,” he says, holding out a red ticket. “I’ve got an extra one.”

My chest tightens. I don’t want to accept anything from him, it feels like I’ll get in trouble if I continue to engage with him but Sophie’s eyes the ticket and looks at me, silently asking permission.

It’s just a ticket. It doesn’t mean anything. Let her have fun.

I reach across Ms. Lucy and take the ticket, careful to avoid any contact with his hand. “Thank you,” I murmur, still not meeting his gaze.

“Can I try, Mama?” Sophie’s voice is barely above a whisper.

“Yes.” I hand her the ticket, and she hurries over to join Tommy at the counter.

The carnival worker, a teenager with braces and a striped vest, hands them each five plastic rings. “Land one on a bottle neck and win a prize!” he announces with rehearsed enthusiasm.

Tommy goes first. One comes close, bouncing off the neck of a green bottle, but none make it.

“Your turn, Sophie!” Tommy steps aside, giving her room.

Sophie clutches her rings, looking back at me. I give her an encouraging nod. “Go ahead, baby. You can do it.”

She turns back to the bottles, her small face scrunched in determination. Her first throw falls short, landing between bottles. The second spins wildly off course.

“Like this, Sophie.” Tommy demonstrates the throwing motion. “You gotta throw it like a frisbee.”

She tries again, this time getting closer but still missing. Her bottom lip trembles slightly as her fourth ring clatters to the ground between bottles.

“Last one,” the carnival worker says kindly. “Make it count!”

---