Page 71 of Lady for Embers

“You think she chose you over Briar?” Tarek asked, entering her personal space.

She stepped back again, feeling far too crowded in her own godsdamn chambers. “She did choose me over Briar. She is still here while he sails west.”

“And yet she has news of their travels.”

“She is not betraying me,” Talwyn insisted.

“Then she should come to tomorrow’s meeting. Share what she knows. Maybe some of it will be useful to us.”

“What?” The back of her knees bumped against the bed as she scrambled for a reason to deny this request. She couldn’t let Ashtine near any of them. They would scent a child on her the moment she stepped into the room. Clearly they knew she was involved with Briar. There would be no question as to whose child it is, and it would certainly be used against the others somehow. There was no way she would allow Ashtine and that babe to beused as a weapon. Briar may not be here to protect her, but she would do what she could until Scarlett came to collect her debt.

“Ashtine obviously has information on their movements. Maybe we can take advantage of that so that our next attack will be more fruitful,” Tarek was saying, ?ngering the hem of her shirt.

“The last mission was a failure?” she asked.

“The Solgard heirs still breathe. Scarlett still sails west and has not been returned to her master. So yes, it was a failure,” he replied, crowding into her even more. She leaned away, back landing on the bed. “But if Ashtine has a way to communicate with their company, perhaps she can plant some information of our own.”

“Ashtine does not play such games,” Talwyn snapped, letting him slip her tunic over her head. She needed him to move on from this idea. If she had to use her body to protect Ashtine, she would.

“She would if her queen demands it of her,” Tarek countered, eyes glazing as he took in her bare torso, stepping between her thighs. “What happened to the queen who would stop at nothing for her revenge?”

His hands came up, ?ngertips skating along her ribs.

What happened to her?

Talwyn had to hold back her huff of laughter. What had happened was she had faded away along with her soul in that throne room. That queen was ?nally starting to realize just how much she would be required to sacri?ce to have that revenge she thought she was owed, that maybe it wasn’t worth everything anymore.

Not that it mattered at this point. There was no turning back from the choices she’d made. She had made this bed. It was no one’s fault but her own that she was now forced to lie in it. Literally.

She tightened her knees around Tarek’s hips, and he looked up at her in surprise. “The only thing her queen is demanding right now is a distraction,” she said.

With a quick movement of her hips, she had Tarek ?ipped onto his back on the bed. He chuckled low in his throat, quickly losing his pants as she removed hers.

“You always need to be in control, don’t you, Moon?ower?” he said, hissing as she slid down onto his length.

She did need control. Except with Azrael.

With Azrael, she’d ?nally given up that control. With Azrael, she’d had a place to let herself be vulnerable. She could let him make the choices and decisions, giving her freedom from herresponsibilities, just for a little while. In those moments, he controlled her world so she didn’t have to.

But this, with Tarek, would do nothing for her. It hadn’t since he’d returned. It couldn’t when she was too dead inside to feel anything. She’d simply gotten annoyed and let him take care of his own needs with her body.

And later, as she lay next to Tarek sleeping beside her for the ?rst time in nearly two months, she decided she would do this. She would do whatever it took to keep Ashtine away from them. It would in no way atone for any of her sins. It wouldn’t save her from the torment Arius surely had in store for her. But she wanted Ashtine to know she saw what she had sacri?ced for her. She wished she hadn’t. She wished she’d left with Briar, left her to her self-in?icted demise, but she’d repay this debt with a sacri?ce of her own. Perhaps the only real sacri?ce she had ever made for someone other than herself or in the name of revenge.

Chapter 14

Scarlett

Scarlett hoisted herself up the rungs as she climbed the main mast of the ship. They had spent the morning on Briar’s ship paying respects to the fallen. She had learned that Fae are not entombed the way the mortals entomb their dead. No, the Fae give their bodies back to the element that ran through their veins when they crossed the Veil to the After. The body is burned, and then the ashes are offered up to the god of their element in a ceremony they call The Farewell. And while she had watched as the Fire Fae had worked to carefully burn the bodies of the thirty-two Fae warriors they had lost, she hadn’t been able to help. Panic had wrapped its icy claws around her chest, leaving her unable to move, scarcely able to breathe as she watched them continue to burn those of the ?re element until even their ashes were nothing. Because that had almost been Sorin. She’d nearly lost the contents of her stomach as Azrael carefully stored the ashes of the Earth Fae to be scattered among the soil whenever they reached dry ground again. And when Briar had released the ashes of the Water Fae, of Nakoa, back to the sea, she couldn’t keep the tears from spilling over any longer. She’d paid homage and respect to those Fae who had given their lives to protect her own, to protect the innocents, to protect their home.

She wanted to go and hide in her quarters with Sorin beside her, escape to the place where it was just him and her, where everything going on around them couldn’t seem to touch them. She wanted to lose herself in him, remind herself that she wasn’t watching his ashes burn away to nothing to return to Anala. But as much as she wanted to do that, this needed to be done more.

She reached the top of the mast, climbing onto the lookout platform where a female sat with her legs dangling over the edge. Her red-gold hair was unbound, blowing in the breeze, weapons discarded on the small platform beside her. Her grey eyes were ?xed on the sea, the same direction Briar had released the ashes of the Water Fae.

Scarlett moved silently, lowering down beside her. She reached over, grasping her hand and intertwining their ?ngers. Eliza rested her head against her shoulder without a word. Scarlett reached up with her other hand, smoothing her friend’s hair back before resting her cheek against the top of her head.

The Farewell was the ?rst time she’d seen the general since the battle. She’d watched Eliza through her tear-?lled eyes. Watched her keep her composure as she used her ?ames to light the pyre around Nakoa’s shrouded body, the Water Court at her side. Watched her bottom lip tremble the smallest amount. Watched her ?ght back the tears but didn’t let a single one fall as she said her goodbye to a teacher, a fellow general, a friend, a lover.

She didn’t know how deep her feelings went for the Water Commander. She knew that when Eliza had surpassed all the instructors in the Fire Court, Nakoa had taken over her training, helping her hone her skills into what they were now. She knew they often trained the Fire and Water Court armies together. She knew they often shared a bed, that Eliza had spent more nights on Briar’s ship with him than she did on their own ship these past few weeks.

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